Remember Invisible Grandma? Well, a few days ago she resurfaced in an email to DH. The email went something like this:
"I'm going to be in Indiana to visit The So-and-So's. Can you come out to see us?"
DH-"Umm no. I have to work, and even if I wasn't working I still couldn't and wouldn't do that. It's six hours away. We cannot afford the gas money, the hotel room, the meals, or anything involved with travelling. Besides, our children are too young and have never done an overnight. It would be miserable for all of us. Why can't you come and see us?"
But wait, there's more!
DH phones me today and says he got into with SIL over text messages! SIL wanted pictures of our kids to send to FIL since yesterday was Father's Day. Okay, that's great. We were very busy yesterday, both of us had to work and then had plans with family later in the day after work. We took videos and pictures of all the kids and sent them over email, also sent other pictures we had taken earlier in the week when we were at the park. No problem, right?
Wrong. SIL sends DH a NASTY text message saying "You never fail to disappoint." HUH??? "Those pictures weren't what we had in mind." SAY WHAT? Allegedly, FIL wanted to see our kids dressed up and performing like circus animals-figuratively speaking. DH said the only reason SIL is mad is because he is the only one who is willing to say NO to FIL and his own selfish demands. DH resents that his father made him "perform" in front of people all the time and never let him just be a kid, and he absolutely refuses to treat his own kids that way. Again, SIL "claims" this is what FIL wanted to see-However, while not entirely out of the question, FIL is in very poor health and has been for many years. Any other time we have sent him pictures of the kids he has been immensely grateful for that, and I really don't think he has the energy to be as insistent and unreasonable as he once was. DH said that SIL is the only one who is upset about it because SHE was the one who wanted to see our kids that way and was embarrassed when DH sent her quite the opposite.
And of course, MIL and SIL are like peas and carrots, so of course SIL is gonna run to MIL and tell her all kinds of insane lies. Just so you understand what kind of people we are dealing with here, we're talking about two individuals who a few months after the onset of FIL's disabling illness booked a monthlong trip to Italy, leaving DH who was 17 years old at the time at home by himself to care for FIL with no help.
DH says they're both nuts and wants nothing to do with them anymore.
I think it's sad and I wish his family wasn't so messed up. Then again, I'm still boiling angry that they act like we aren't as good as they are, like they are somehow above us and we're just not high class enough for them and would at least like to tell them off before I cut the cord completely.
"I'm going to be in Indiana to visit The So-and-So's. Can you come out to see us?"
DH-"Umm no. I have to work, and even if I wasn't working I still couldn't and wouldn't do that. It's six hours away. We cannot afford the gas money, the hotel room, the meals, or anything involved with travelling. Besides, our children are too young and have never done an overnight. It would be miserable for all of us. Why can't you come and see us?"
But wait, there's more!
DH phones me today and says he got into with SIL over text messages! SIL wanted pictures of our kids to send to FIL since yesterday was Father's Day. Okay, that's great. We were very busy yesterday, both of us had to work and then had plans with family later in the day after work. We took videos and pictures of all the kids and sent them over email, also sent other pictures we had taken earlier in the week when we were at the park. No problem, right?
Wrong. SIL sends DH a NASTY text message saying "You never fail to disappoint." HUH??? "Those pictures weren't what we had in mind." SAY WHAT? Allegedly, FIL wanted to see our kids dressed up and performing like circus animals-figuratively speaking. DH said the only reason SIL is mad is because he is the only one who is willing to say NO to FIL and his own selfish demands. DH resents that his father made him "perform" in front of people all the time and never let him just be a kid, and he absolutely refuses to treat his own kids that way. Again, SIL "claims" this is what FIL wanted to see-However, while not entirely out of the question, FIL is in very poor health and has been for many years. Any other time we have sent him pictures of the kids he has been immensely grateful for that, and I really don't think he has the energy to be as insistent and unreasonable as he once was. DH said that SIL is the only one who is upset about it because SHE was the one who wanted to see our kids that way and was embarrassed when DH sent her quite the opposite.
And of course, MIL and SIL are like peas and carrots, so of course SIL is gonna run to MIL and tell her all kinds of insane lies. Just so you understand what kind of people we are dealing with here, we're talking about two individuals who a few months after the onset of FIL's disabling illness booked a monthlong trip to Italy, leaving DH who was 17 years old at the time at home by himself to care for FIL with no help.
DH says they're both nuts and wants nothing to do with them anymore.
I think it's sad and I wish his family wasn't so messed up. Then again, I'm still boiling angry that they act like we aren't as good as they are, like they are somehow above us and we're just not high class enough for them and would at least like to tell them off before I cut the cord completely.
