Ideas On How To Help My Friend (going back to work)

[AnnaNova]

so a friend of mine went back to work and is really struggling... well you know, we've all been there, her baby is about 4.5 mo old. she's not a particularly close friend, a neighbor - we talk once in a while and i invite them over once in a blue moon. I feel so bad for her. I went back to work when my son was about 4 mo and I'm still struggling with it.
I've been trying to be supportive when we talk, but I can see that she is really on the verge of breaking into tears a lot of times when she talks about her work and her baby.
Her boss is not very understanding, and i think she's holding on to the job because of her concerns of never finding something as good and losing everything she has gained so far in terms of career advancement and experience.
Somehow even though i went (and still am going) throuh similar things, I find myself at loss for words or ideas... mainly because i just had to suck it up and deal with it. I really want to help though.
Any ideas welcomed

[mokey4]

I don't really know what you can do/say, but I think being there for your friend as a person to talk to who understands is really important and helpful. You could also let her know that you're there for her, if she needs any additional support from you.

[Caneel]

How long has your friend been back to work?

A good and wise friend of mine had her children years before I did and she quit working just shortly after she returned after the birth of her first child. (She quickly came to regret leaving her job)

The advice she gave me was to do nothing, make no descisions for at least the first 3 months back to work. Sort of along the theory of things will settle down after a while and everyone will get into a groove. I found this to be true.

[AnnaNova]

Originally Posted by Caneel

How long has your friend been back to work?

A good and wise friend of mine had her children years before I did and she quit working just shortly after she returned after the birth of her first child. (She quickly came to regret leaving her job)

The advice she gave me was to do nothing, make no descisions for at least the first 3 months back to work. Sort of along the theory of things will settle down after a while and everyone will get into a groove. I found this to be true.

that is excellent piece of advice! i think she has been back at work for a little over a month. yes, it's a very hard time for her, and i think a lot of it is hormones and just being away from her baby for the first time since he was born.

[laurabfig]

I think just being available to listen is great. Invite her over on the weekend for coffee/tea. Cook extra dinner and bring some to her family. Ask if she wants to go for a walk or run together.
She may just need a compassionate listening ear...which it sounds like you are.
I think sharing your honest experience can be helpful too...so she knows that you care and can relate to what she is feeling.