My Dad has cancer UPDATE in post #47

[paintedfire]

I just posted this in grief but I think it probably belongs here more:

I just got a phone call from my Dad. He had his annual checkup last week. He's always been ridiculously healthy for a man of this age with his history, diet, and habits but last week was different.

My Dad was just diagnosed with prostate cancer.

I don't know what to do. I can't stop shaking or crying. I've already lost one father. I can't handle losing another - not this way.

[texmati]

o gosh paintedfire. I'm so so very sorry. I know that this is devestating-- but I have heard of good outcomes with prostate cancer.

Anyway you can see him?

[NaturalMama311]

I know there's nothing I can say to ease the pain or make you feel even the tiniest bit better at such a terrible time. But I'm thinking about you and sending lots and lots of love and hugs. Keep your head up and hope for the best.

[cmnewbs]

I am so sorry to hear this. It's good that he gets check ups regularly,hopefully it's not advanced. He needs to get on the right treatment plan and fight. There are lots of survivors out there. It's hard, but all you can do is be there for him, and that means a lot. Sending healing thoughts to you and your family.

[baglady]

I'm so sorry. What horrible news. I did a quick google; prostate cancer is considered very treatable, not that that makes it sting any less. I'll keep your family in my prayers.

[momtoS]

HUGS. Prostate cancer, I believe, is pretty treatable and slow growing. I hope he will be okay!

[paintedfire]

I just tried to call DF but he's upstate doing a interview today and I keep getting sent directly to his voice mail. He never turns his phone off so he must be out of range.

I'm the first person my Dad called. He's turning 78 in a little over two weeks, so he's not young but he's not terribly old, either. He does live in Houston, so he's got MD Anderson right there and that helps but I feel like I need to be there. He said I shouldn't come, but I don't think I'm going to listen to him.

[~Adorkable~]

Hearing something like this. Must be so hard.
If I can suggest one thing from having been around a lot of medical folks, give it a few days or weeks to get to the bottom of things. There will be folow up test and a lot of things to figure out and get a plan of attack.
I understand his wanting you to stay put until things settle and the facts are know, these first days are so hard.

Hugs lady, we're here for you

[paintedfire]

Originally Posted by •Adorkable•

Hearing something like this. Must be so hard.
If I can suggest one thing from having been around a lot of medical folks, give it a few days or weeks to get to the bottom of things. There will be folow up test and a lot of things to figure out and get a plan of attack.
I understand his wanting you to stay put until things settle and the facts are know, these first days are so hard.

Hugs lady, we're here for you

I get that, really I do. I just want to make him tea, you know? I'm a mother hen when not in crisis mode and hearing the word "cancer" is making me panicky.

My sister-in-law battled breast cancer a few years ago and won, and cancer in general is big in my extended family - in the immediate it isn't though. Especially not my Dad - he doesn't even get colds, so I've got no frame of reference for him being ill. The closest thing I can come with is when he had hernia surgery back when I was a teenager or how his knee acts up from an old high-school football injury every so often.

DF is the best at calming me down, but he's god only knows where.

And thanks. I appreciate it.

[MPsSweetie]

I am so sorry to hear that! (((hugs)))

My mom has lung cancer... she is 51. She also had a few strokes when my DS was 2 weeks old, its HARD when your parents are sick.

[Beverly]

Oh, such a bad shock. I'm really sorry to hear it.

[stormgirl]

Hang in there! Sorry.

[mumma cop kaz]

Im so sorry leigh, I would want to be there too. Hopefully you can talk to your DP soon and work out what is best for you and your dad.

[Saminvero]

I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. Prostate cancer is one of the most treatable cancers with the BEST success/survival rate with treatment. We're here if you need us. Sending BIG hugs!

[thebigfam]

Oh Leigh, My dad was diagnosed with cancer when I was in AIr Force Basic training. Unfortunately i had no option to see him. I was in Texas he was in Michigan. He had cancer in his eye, it was removed and he is now 7 years in remission. At the same time my cousin was fighting testicular cancer and my grandfather bone cancer. I hope your father has the same outcome as my father and cousin!

Big momma

[thebeljur]

s
Keep us posted, OK?

[paintedfire]

Okay, I've been obsessively reading studies on the different therapies for prostate cancer. I talked to my Mom, both my brothers, and my Dad again. He told me that he's seeing the specialist on Tuesday, so after that appointment we'll know more about where this is going.

DF finally got back to me, too. He's got to finish the project he's on right now, but he's already taking care of me: two of his good friends - they all work together - are coming by with takeout, ostensibly to feed me, but really to watch me and make sure I stay calm.

I don't want to talk to them, though. My best friend, Matt, was here a little bit ago to pick something up and I told him what's going on. He offered to cancel his plans and stay with me but I'm just not up to company right now. I figure I'll eat dinner with Julia and Molly (DF's friends) but try and shoo them out after a bit.

I was even calmer than I am now but when I talked to my Dad I found out that his Gleason scale sum is a 7. That's bad because the highest you can get is a 10. The higher the number, the worse the prognosis. But I'm trying to mellow out again and just hope for the best come Tuesday. We'll see.

Thank you so much to everyone. I appreciate all of you more than I can say.

Also, this is so bad of me, but I can't help but wonder: am I ever going to be allowed to go a week without catching something or someone in my life getting bad news? Just a little boring, that's all I'm looking for - just a little. A month of relative quiet. A week, even.

[Bethla]

My dad had lymphoma and then several years later was diagnosed with prostate cancer. He is a very healthy guy, lots of exercise and eats a good varied diet and non-smoker. He decided to have his prostate removed and everything has gone well. That was probably 5 years ago. It's defintely a stressful situation for the whole family. Best wishes to you and your family!

[QuestionGal]

oh HUGS. I live in Houston. PM me and let me know if there's anything I can do. I lost my grandfather to prostate cancer BUT it was his choice to NOT seek treatment. The prognosis was actually really good for him but he'd already lost his wife and didn't want to go on anymore.

[mamas2atti]

Big, huge hugs mama. I'm so sorry.