How very horrible to be there, experiencing that
I really think you need to talk to Mom. She needs to know what you went through- what you say- the way Dad behaved. I know it's akward, and maybe difficult, but if you were taking awesome care of MY DS- then I would want to know.
Up here (northern cali) the one gym I belonged to had no lifegards on duty as well. They also had Deck Supervisors- their sole job was to clean the swim area (towels, drinks left over, also set out equiptment needed for classes, put away equiptment) they are absolutly NOT trained as Lifeguards. It's POSTED that they have NO TRAINING, and when you join the Gym you must sign several releases that state 1-No Lifeguards on duty 2-No Training is provided to Deck People 3-the Gym is not liable for any accidents, injury or death related in regards to the pool.
I would also write the Gym a letter. Very clear about what you want/expect to happen. Very clear about your upset over the Employee's standing around not doing anything. I also would include the rude woman on the phone and the attitude you've endured. It's not acceptable, even if you were the 112th caller regarding this. Grow some Customer Service, for crying out loud.
I would also debate contacting CPS after talking to the Mom. I am deeply disturbed by the Dad's reaction. It seemed to me like he was intoxicated (drugs? alcohol? rx's?) by his strange behavior. Yes, stress and grief make people react in different ways, but it seems to me this was almost a Joke in his mind.
Very Very Very disturbing. I'm NOT big into calling CPS, however this situation is one that the child almost died- and the dad was wondering why he Sh*t himself???? REALLY??? Just horrible
I agree that you should see someone for some counseling. I think talking to the mom will help, and maybe even seeing the little boy. Provide some closure, but that won't get rid of the picture of him in your head
Please consider this as well.