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Traditional Catholic Moms Summer 2010 chat - Page 7

post #121 of 139
9/13/10 at 9:58am
Hi everyone!

Could you, please, help me with these to thing:

- How many kids do Gregory and Lisa Popcak have?

- Are there any books written for Catholic moms who have to work outside the home? A friend feels down when she reads the "normal" books about Catholic motherhood, and cannot find any that would speak more to her. (And this lady really HAS to work outside the home.)

BTW, Did everyone know that Bill and Martha Sears are practicing Catholics? It makes perfect sense but I just found out.

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post #122 of 139
9/13/10 at 10:50am
just checking in: My whole family is still really struggling right now with the loss of Emeric. It is definately affecting all of us and we could sure use some prayers. Also, dh and I are struggling as he feels very done having children and I would really like another one. I have put a lot of prayer and meditation into this and the answers that I have received really leads me to believe that we will have more children I just have to back off and it will happen in God's time.

On another note:
Although, our parish has a wonderful nursery, pre-school for my 3 yr old, and children's liturgy of the word my 2 older boys sit through part of mass with us. They are 8 and 6 but both have sensory processing disorder (spd) and ds2 has other issues as well (I think adhd although it hasn't been diagnosed). My childen are usually fairly well behaved but very wiggly and it can be sometimes difficult to get them to participate (especially ds1) as he checks out and really can't follow what is going on. My kids like to sit in the front row so they can see (which bothers me as I don't want others to see all of the squirming, or me crying which I do all the time during mass right now, etc) but since they want it that is where we sit if we get there on time and it is usually a better experience for all of us. Yesterday ds to was wildly dancing to the gloria and singing every word. I never know if I should repremend him and have him be more reverent or just accept it. I just went with it and during the CLOW the priest called my ds2 up and announced to the congregation how wonderful to see someone so young participate and be happy about the entire gloria and that some of the adults could learn something from his inthusiasm. Then at the end of mass on the way out of the church the priest and deacon both stopped by and said what a great job we were doing and how it was so awesome to see our kids so involved..... It made my day and it made all of the hard work worthwhile.
just wanted to share.
post #123 of 139
9/13/10 at 11:04am
blessedmama (Christine)- Congrats! How many c/s have you had?

anumaria- I can't answer any of your questions, but with regards to your friend, if she HAS to work, then she is doing what God wants her to do to fulfill her vocation. She is called to take care of her children and if her DH can't do it (or if she has no DH), then she is obligated to do so. She has nothing to feel ashamed about. If God wants her home, He will provide another way for her to do things so she can be home. Until that time she should try to be at peace that she is doing God's will.

theboysmama: Your story made me smile My little ones are very vocal singers and we don't discourage it (as long as they are singing at the appropriate times). My DH brought our 18 month old up to the choir loft with him to help me out and all the people in the choir loved his "singing." Oh, and :HUGS As for having more children, maybe don't worry about that right now. Those things have a way of working themselves out.... I can't remember, is your dh Catholic?
post #124 of 139
9/13/10 at 11:45am
my dh is catholic. He does believe me that i have received a very strong message. He is just not willing to be open yet and admits that. We attend mass together every sunday and try to go to adoration about 1x a wk together. I do believe it will work out as God plans but being completely hormonal, postpartum, and full of grief I am having a hard time waiting
post #125 of 139
9/13/10 at 11:50am
Thread Starter 
Congratulations on the baby, Christine!

s and prayers for you and your family, Nicole.
post #126 of 139
9/13/10 at 12:34pm
Thanks, Corrie! The friends knows it is God's will that she work, so that is not the problem. She would simply like to find some advice and encouragement in books meant for someone like her. She has read so many books that make her feel down as they talk about how the mom needs to stay at home, or otherwise are just not helpful. There must be something out there for WOH Catholic moms....?

I finally found out: The Popcaks have 3 children, the youngest being adopted and about 10 years younger than the second child.
post #127 of 139
9/13/10 at 12:42pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by happyblessedmama View Post
hi ladies! I assume by the dates on recent posts that this thread is still sorta going? I don't want to miss a switchover to a "fall/autumn" thread

We had our 6th baby 10 days ago via c-section so I've had a little more computer time as I recover than I otherwise normally would... wanted to say hello!
Congratulations
post #128 of 139
9/14/10 at 2:02pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by happyblessedmama View Post
hi ladies! I assume by the dates on recent posts that this thread is still sorta going? I don't want to miss a switchover to a "fall/autumn" thread

We had our 6th baby 10 days ago via c-section so I've had a little more computer time as I recover than I otherwise normally would... wanted to say hello!
I've said congrats in other places, but will add another here . I hope recovery is still going well.
post #129 of 139
9/15/10 at 12:18am
Just thought I'd pop in and say hi.

I was hoping for some prayers. I feel like my spiritual life is suffering especially in creating a proper practicing Catholic home. I have all of these grand ideas and yet I have a hard time on the follow through. We moved away from our very traditional parish to a parish that is so very different. I want to like it but I don't... I want to not be so judgmental about the music and other unimportant details but I can't seem to stop. I want to embrace this new Catholic community but I'm not. And worst of all I've let myself use these silly bits as excuse to not going.

So prayers for a stronger Catholic Momma and Wife would be oh so helpful.
post #130 of 139
9/16/10 at 9:37pm
Nicole, prayers for you! I can imagine things ARE very hard.

Cagnew - this was my first c-section (it was unplanned).

Olives - I can really relate to what you type! We moved to a community with one catholic church and no driving to the next parish over - there was no other town - and I hated the way they did things. At first. Then I grew to appreciate things like - it's OK that many of the prayers are in a language I don't understand (Yup'ik Eskimo), it's a blessing to the people who cannot understand English. It doesn't mean I didn't still wish I understood the prayers, and the homily for that matter... but I was able to find things to appreciate instead of agitating over how I wished it was "my way".

We recently relocated again to a town with lots of choices on parishes and I think we've found a good one. I hope you are able to make peace with where you are, or find a different church (are there any others w/in reasonable driving distance?). I would not stop going to Mass though - you gain blessings just by going. Have you considered offering up your frustration? If the songs are truly dreadful, could you speak to the priest? Do you have any musical skill you could offer (and then choose the songs yourself??)
post #131 of 139
9/19/10 at 1:18am
Hello mamas!

I have a conundrum.
DD goes to a public school, and I am very pleased with the education she is receiving. I have good communication with her regular teacher, her "specials" teachers, and the administration.

All of that aside, I received something I never thought I would get from a public school- a pamphlet from a local "interdenominational ministry" regarding having my child bussed to a local church for religious instruction, DURING school time.
My mother tells me that something like this occurred for her when she was younger. School got out early on Wednesdays for children to attend local religious education. Children went to their various churches for RE on these days. I understand that, and find it to be a laudable practice.

However, the "opportunity" the district is offering is not the same. I have no choice over what church my child attends, nor do I have power over the message she is receiving. And I am, actually, quite upset that this "invitation" came home. I cannot quite describe just why I am upset, but I do know that being "invited" to hand over my child's religious instruction, grates on my nerves. I do not know the people offering this instruction, nor do I attend their church.

Pennsylvania School Code 1546- Act 175 of 1982 "all children enrolled in public school, with the permission of their parent or guardian, may be "released" from school for one hour a week to receive religious training"
If the district is offering this "opportunity", why are no Catholic churches listed? Where is the listing for the synagogue?

How do I address this issue with the school, the school board, and the district?
post #132 of 139
9/19/10 at 5:11pm
That's a hard one, P&L. Where I live, one religion has a religious education building next to every public school in the state, and children go there for classes at various times throughout the day. I feel similarly uncomfortable about it even though my own child has not come in contact with this. I think that the first thing would be to figure out what you are comfortable with. Do you think it would be better to have an early release one day like your mom talked about? Would you be more comfortable if more religions were represented? What about if the school sent out an invitation for any student to invite their religious group to have religious education during this time and invite students to come? What about allowing parents to take their kids out of school once a week to educate them themselves or to take them to a religious service? It sounds like the flier was just a church that invoked their right to take kids out of school for a religious class and made the necessary arrangements. That shouldn't mean that other religions would be excluded from doing so.
post #133 of 139
9/19/10 at 10:23pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by JMJ View Post
That's a hard one, P&L. Where I live, one religion has a religious education building next to every public school in the state, and children go there for classes at various times throughout the day. I feel similarly uncomfortable about it even though my own child has not come in contact with this. I think that the first thing would be to figure out what you are comfortable with. Do you think it would be better to have an early release one day like your mom talked about? Would you be more comfortable if more religions were represented?
Yes. I think if more religious opportunities were offered, I would feel more comfortable.

Quote:
What about if the school sent out an invitation for any student to invite their religious group to have religious education during this time and invite students to come? What about allowing parents to take their kids out of school once a week to educate them themselves or to take them to a religious service?
This makes a lot of sense. However, I am not sure if the ability to use Act 174 was extended to any other churches. I have been trying to find the minutes from the school board meeting, and they are not available online.
Once I get the minutes, I will be far better prepared to address this.

Quote:
It sounds like the flier was just a church that invoked their right to take kids out of school for a religious class and made the necessary arrangements. That shouldn't mean that other religions would be excluded from doing so.
This is what I think. I am going to talk to Fr. Mark,and find out if my Church wants to invoke our right to use released time.
post #134 of 139
9/20/10 at 5:11pm
I started a new thread for us http://www.mothering.com/discussions...9#post15863859
post #135 of 139
9/20/10 at 5:16pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Olives View Post
Just thought I'd pop in and say hi.

I was hoping for some prayers. I feel like my spiritual life is suffering especially in creating a proper practicing Catholic home. I have all of these grand ideas and yet I have a hard time on the follow through. We moved away from our very traditional parish to a parish that is so very different. I want to like it but I don't... I want to not be so judgmental about the music and other unimportant details but I can't seem to stop. I want to embrace this new Catholic community but I'm not. And worst of all I've let myself use these silly bits as excuse to not going.

So prayers for a stronger Catholic Momma and Wife would be oh so helpful.
I am in the same boat. Workin' on it...
post #136 of 139
9/20/10 at 6:13pm
Ladies, please google grave and sufficient reasons. "Grave" was a translation error and what the Latin says is that you need sufficient reasons to use nfp. While it is a small detail, it still is something and describes things much better. You need good enough reasons, whether they are grave or not. In North America there is this idea (due to the earlier, faulty translation) that one needs to be very sick, have no food, etc. to use nfp. What is sufficient is pf course a hard question, something between each couple and God...
post #137 of 139
9/22/10 at 9:43am
re: the church and the religious education option - it's entirely possible that no catholic church wants to offer daytime RE for kids. I'd call your local parish(es) or the diocese and ask. They may just be unaware of the provision or opportunity, or they may not be able to fill the demand if one exists.

re: "grave and sufficient reasons"... did I miss where this discussion is coming from? (Realizing we have a new thread here, and i'm newly postpartum so the "huh?" may be warranted!)
post #138 of 139
9/22/10 at 3:37pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anumaria View Post
Ladies, please google grave and sufficient reasons. "Grave" was a translation error and what the Latin says is that you need sufficient reasons to use nfp. While it is a small detail, it still is something and describes things much better. You need good enough reasons, whether they are grave or not. In North America there is this idea (due to the earlier, faulty translation) that one needs to be very sick, have no food, etc. to use nfp. What is sufficient is pf course a hard question, something between each couple and God...
It's interesting that you randomly brought this up (I didn't notice it mentioned earlier). This is a topic of great interest to me and I am working on writing an article and maybe even a short book on NFP. The research required to get a good grasp on the topic is much more immense than I previously thought, so I am still in research stage. I am going to start a new thread about this and I will relate what I have learned so far there
post #139 of 139
9/22/10 at 4:26pm
Sorry, I have no idea where I was supposed to post the previous thing.

I do know that it did have something to do with someone talking about whether or not they had grave reasons.

On to the new thread...
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