Does this seem reasonable for this service?

[kittynurse]

I'm hoping to get some advice on what to pay a mother's helper/support person for this summer.

I have a just turned 6 yo DS with ADHD, SPD and anxiety. I also have a 3.5 yo DS with lots and lots of energy!

I've hired a teenager to come twice a week to play with them, do some fun school activities (Handwriting without Tears and other fun stuff like that) and most importantly, go to karate class with DS1 and be his support person in the class.

The teenager's mother was DS1's Inclusion Facilitator at preschool for 3 years so I am very comfortable with her plus I know that she has the skills to do the job as well as having her mother for backup.

I've been struggling with how much to pay her. I asked her mum but she didn't really give me anything concrete. I want to give her a fair wage and I think she should get more than the average babysitter because of DS1's issues and also because she will be going to the karate class.

I only want her for 5 hours 2 days a week and we're also going away for 2 weeks which is another reason I feel I should pay her a little more because she could have gotten another job with more hours.

I tried to approach it from the perspective of how much the service would be worth to me over the course of the summer. I decided that it was worth $1000. Honestly, her just going to the karate class alone is worth that to me - I love my son dearly but I'm pretty much done being his support person in classes, we both end up frustrated and upset.

Anyway, when I worked it out by dividing that $1000 over the summer it works out to ~$17/hour. Does that seem totally outrageous? We can afford it so that isn't an issue. Would I be better paying a lower rate and then giving her a bonus at the end of the summer? If so, what would you pay?

What do you guys think?

Martha

[kme]

I am one to overpay babysitters and it seems like a lot to me although not "totally outrageous". I used to pay $20/hr for my 4 kids. Good babysitters should be paid well in my opinion!! Have you already told her the hours? If not, I would probably pay her the $1000 but add in a few more hours. If so, I would pay a bit less and then if she does a really good job pay her a bonus up to the $1000.

I think the amount depends on several factors:
1. How reliable and how "good" she is
2. How old she is
3. Where you live (cost of living)
4. The functioning level of your son(s)

[sncmom]

I'm fond of overpaying babysitters also. But $17/hour seems like a lot to me too. You might just want to have her there for more hours/week. I would also think about whether or not that's how much you're willing to pay her if she babysits in the future. If so, go for it.
Good luck. She sounds great.

[kittynurse]

Thanks for the advice guys!

More hours per week isn't an option since she had another job on the other days and we are quite busy this summer.

To answer some of the questions:

She's never babysat for us before so I can't say for sure I know about her reliablity but we have gotten to know her over the last 3 years and feel very comfortable. We know her mother very very well since she is DS1's inclusion facilitator at school and also have gotten to know the family outside of school. The daughter is the oldest in the family and is very responsible and sensible (I've gleaned this from conversations I've had with her mother and the other teachers). She wants to be a teacher and has even taken some courses to learn about inclusion in classrooms. She also has a younger brother whose issues are practically identical to DS1 so I feel like she does have good experience dealing with our particular needs. She came over last summer for me to teach her how to make jam and she ended up playing with the boys and they all seemed to get along well.

I believe she is 16ish.

I don't actually know what the cost of living is here but I should point out that we are in Canada so with the exchange it would be a bit less in USD. The family is of modest means so I know that the money would be helpful for her.

My son is very high functioning in one way but needs constant reminders, guidance and help. Both boys are extremely active (hence, the need for a break for Mummy!) She definitely won't be sitting around reading while she is here!

I think I have decided upon $12 an hour and then I will give her a bonus at the end of the summer to bring it up to the $1000. She is also looking after our cats this weekend so I will be able to add a bit in that way. This truly is worth it to me.

Thanks for helping me think this through!

Martha

[Kathy2579]

I have a mothers helper come in 3 days a week 2 hours a day. My son has some unknow issues at the point he is almost 2 and I have a 6 month old. She does games puzzles and often helps me go to the store or swim class.
I pay her $10 an hour. The average sitter gets about $5-7 an hour per child in my area. I am with her at all times she is 15 years old.

I would go with $10 an hour at this age most teen can't get a job that pays that.

[kittynurse]

Well, she came today and it was awesome! The kids love her and they had a great day. I got tonnes of housework done which is a minor miracle.

The best part of all is that DS1 *loved* his karate class despite initially being very scared to go. The babysitter was a great support person for him in the class and I have a feeling it is going to be a very good experience for DS1.

She has even come up with some ideas for fun school-like activities for the boys (with some help from her mum) to help DS1 stay on track and not lose any ground over the summer.

So, I'm definitely sure that I've made the right decision on how much to pay her.

Thanks for your help guys!

Martha

[kittynurse]

Originally Posted by Kathy2579

I have a mothers helper come in 3 days a week 2 hours a day. My son has some unknow issues at the point he is almost 2 and I have a 6 month old. She does games puzzles and often helps me go to the store or swim class.
I pay her $10 an hour. The average sitter gets about $5-7 an hour per child in my area. I am with her at all times she is 15 years old.

I would go with $10 an hour at this age most teen can't get a job that pays that.

I think I was a bit misleading in my initial post. I used the term mother's helper because I will still be here but really, she is babysitting them. I'm home but I'm going to be busy working on the house and catching up on stuff that I never get done.

[Kathy2579]

Originally Posted by kittynurse

I think I was a bit misleading in my initial post. I used the term mother's helper because I will still be here but really, she is babysitting them. I'm home but I'm going to be busy working on the house and catching up on stuff that I never get done.

i would say my set up is the same. I work go to the store or clean.
You have to do what best for you. It sounds like things went well.