Friend's partner has a cocaine problem

[Pepe]

How can I help and support my friend who just found out his partner of 16 years has a cocaine problem? Confronted user denies it's a habit--he says it was just experimentation, but this has likely been a habit for some time, possibly as long as two years. My friend is planning on trying to get his partner to therapy (probably together).

This problem is certainly beyond the scope of my expertise, but can anyone recommend books or online resources? This information is less than a week old, so he's at the very beginning of trying to wrap his mind around this troubling information.

I can provide more info if needed--I'm trying to keep this short and to the point. Thanks for any help/ideas.

[RiverTam]

Good luck. You're going to need it.

No one can fix the problem, but the addict. It's not in the power of a loved one to make an addict quit. Even an intervention isn't a guarantee. Sometimes you do an intervention, and the addict refuses to quit or go to treatment or get therapy.

Sometimes (often!) the only solution is to break up with/divorce the addict.

Resources that might help:

Co-Anon - http://www.co-anon.org/
(for family members of coke addicts)

Cocaine Anonymous - http://www.ca.org/meetings.html

Rational Recovery - https://rational.org/index.php?id=1

Lifering - http://lifering.org/wp/

SOS - http://www.cfiwest.org/sos/index.htm


There is a drug that could help. Some cocaine addicts have taken Zyban (aka Wellbutrin or bupropion) to good effect when they're trying to quit taking coke. It's a weak dopamine effector and seems to help with cocaine cravings. (This is an off-label use. It's commonly prescribed for quitting smoking and as an antidepressant.)

[RiverTam]

One more resource -- I've found the family forums at http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/

to be very helpful.

There is a section for family/friends of drug users.

[Pepe]

Thanks very much--that's exactly what I was looking for. I appreciate it.

[Grace and Granola]

I highly recommend Alanon for your friend as the loved one of an addict. It will help him to NOT feel responsible for his partner's addiction or recovery. It is absolutely wonderful. There should be many groups to choose from, I'm sure you can just google Alanon.