I'm so confused by this. Ole people would call this "playin house". You don't want to be legally married but you call him your husband. You don't want to legally change your name just call yourself his name? If you are so anti marriage then why do you pretend that you are? Do you think that it'll be an easier fit for your family into society's box of what is a family?.... I may be biased on this one though because this a personal pet peev of mine.
I'm not going to pretend to understand everyone, that may drive me insane! But if you want to be seen as a traditional family unit, society has ways of letting others know of our commitments to another!
I feel like when people call each other "husband" and "wife" when they aren't married or play house as htcmommy put it, I think it degrades the level of commitment married couples have made to each other.
There is nothing wrong with having a partner, or the father of your children, or a boyfriend. If that is what you are, then don't hide it!