Help! Where di my sweet, easy going boy go? 4 yo driving me CRAZY!

[kindacrunchy]

My 4 yo has been having some serious tantrums, really digging in his heels about things, you ask him to do something or not do something and he does the complete opposite, he eats 4 bites and he is off and running then either melts downs down (cause he needs to eat) or asks for treats, then melts down when i say no. Dinner is the biggest issue. He looks at everything I make and says he doesn't want that (even though he has loved it in the past). I know he is trying to establish independence. He is also the youngest and now his brother is home all day, everyday due to summer break so I think he is missing all of our one on one time. Even though I know that, I'm just at my wits end about it because it is really taking its toll on the family.

[4evermom]

You'd have to pay me some serious bucks to do 4 over.

I did start telling him the opposite of what I wanted in an obvious (melodramatic/silly) way. I wasn't really trying to trick him but it gave him an outlet for being contrary. Made him feel good and kept me from going nuts.

[fyrwmn]

no suggestions, just sympathy. dd hit a rather difficult stage at around 3.5 and 4 has been a rollercoaster rde. she can be sweet as pie one minute and then act like a teenager the next. she'll eat fine, it's just getting her to actually sit during mealtime that we have a problem with. she prefers to perch in her chair or half stand/half sit, usally half in dh's seat lol. our biggest problem is the freshness. people keep tellin me that 5 is much better, so i'm hoping. i think they're just at a point now where they want that independance, but don't want to give up being our babies either. it has to be a very confusing time for them!

[Asparagus78]

There right now. Some days (ok, most days!) I love him, but I don't like him, if that makes sense. It makes me want to take back every complaint I ever had when he was a baby. Babies are easy compared to preschoolers. I can't wait for the teen years

[lonegirl]

My son will be 4 in Nov but he is hitting that stage now. Some days his non-stop meltdowns drive me bananas. Seriously, he hates being told no....sure we all do....but oh my goodness please. Then if I say no, he asks again 2 min later then again 2 min after that...clearly trying to wear me down. I explain to him that my answer is not going to change that if it is now, 5min from now or an hour later I will have the same answer for him.
grrrr