SAHM turned Student/Working Mother: I want to hear your story!

[cakemama579]

Hello All,

I was hoping to hear some stories from other mothers out there who made the decision to return to school or work, not based on necessity, but by choice, after being a SAHM for at least a couple of years. Where did/do your children go while you are away? How did/do you cope with the separation? How does your child handle the separation (especially at first)? Do you feel it is the right decision? Any regrets?



Sarah

[SoulCakes]

Hi Sarah!

I decided to go back to school when my daughter was two (now five). It was definitely the best decision for me--I was getting antsy staying at home, though I enjoyed being able to have those first couple of years and hope to have them with my next.

We enrolled our daughter in a wonderful daycare center near our home. It was a bright, cheery, colorful atmosphere and she loved it there although there was an adjustment period. At first she wasn't happy about being left, but she did adapt and fairly quickly at that. That said, she only attended three days a week from about 9am to 2pm for the first year, then she began attending every day and she actually seemed to enjoy it even more (probably the routine). It was a great place, and we never had any problems.

No regrets whatsoever. Had she not adjusted well, I probably would have felt more guilty, but I had to do what was right for me at the time, too, which was use my brain in more active ways. I also did my research when it came time to find childcare--had I not been so happy with the provider I chose, I obviously would have felt differently about my decision.

Good luck!

[LittleBattleAxe]

I made the decision to go to work FT this fall, and I am so excited! I haven't worked FT in many years as I have been raising my little tribe, but I got offered the job I really, really wanted, so I took it!

My youngest is four and will be going to a fulltime preschool with after care; he is very social and excited about being with other kids all day. My oldest children are in school, so for them, it just means that they have to stay in the afterschool program for about an hour.

The biggest change is going to have to be the way chores fall -- which is mostly on me. I have told the kids they are going to have to be responsible for cleaning up after themselves more than they are now, my dh is going to have to get them to school every morning, they are going to have to pitch in with laundry and such. They are excited for me, but I am sure it is going to be an adjustment for all of us.

[Peony]

I have a relaxed schedule so I may not be the person you are looking for. I was a SAHM for 7 years before deciding to add more things on my plate. For 6 of those years I did volunteer extensively for an organization (I do still) so I used to having other commitments, but it was very child friendly although I couldn't bring all my children with me all the the time. I decided to take the one class I was missing for the IBCLC exam, at the same time, a part time job offer in my field dropped in my lap, it was WAY too good to pass up. So despite not needing it, I accepted. I work mostly from home which is rough trying to do it around my 3 kids, I take a lot of phone calls in interesting places! I have to go into the office twice a week and attend or conduct meetings 3 times a month. Child care is patched together right now. When school starts again my oldest is in 2nd grade so 5 days a week I have her taken care of. My middle child will be in pre-school 2 days, I aligned my in office days with those two days, and then I just have the 1y left. He gets pawned off on family, friends, and sitters, it literally is patching it together every time I need to go in but I don't need to be in there enough to have regular child care for him.

I work some every day but it could be 20 minutes from home or several hours in office or again at home. The trade off on my relaxed job is that I am always on call, I have 5 employees I supervise for my program and I have to respond to their calls promptly because of the nature of the program (medical).

I also was accepted to grad school this fall but I have spent all of this year studying for one thing or another while doing this job so it shouldn't be too much worse then what I already have going on.