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Queer Conceptions - July - Page 4

post #61 of 486

I have thought about surrogacy. I had very easy pregnancies and simple, uncomplicated births. I was also completely detatched from my DD for the first couple of weeks (thought she had some issues going on, which I would have learned to deal with, but very much not a bonding experinece in those early weeks), so I think if I had as many kids as I wanted (DP has upped her desired number to 7, LOL, so I don't see it happening any time soon) I could see going into it expecting to be carrying someone else's child and come out on the other side pretty ok.

I have a slightly harder time saying, yeah, I would like to adopt, but I would carry someone else's kid.


Yeah, I'm amazingly comfortable talking about this stuff to strangers. I don't talk about my own personal mucous and cervix, but I talk about generalizations. The girls at work drill me all the time about it, they're mostly all on the pill, so it's a really different cycle, but my cousin, I just talked with her about how to actually know what's going on with her cycle, since she's nursing. Yeah, I am a nurse, tho. I can talk talk about anything without blushing or, really even thinking it's weird (I start a lot of conversations with, Hi, how are you today? Are you having any pain? Have your bowels moved lately?). - tho at the same time, I got really grumpy with DP for trying to hand me a tampon in front of the bathroom at tractor supply the other day, tho I think that may have had more to do with the upsetness about still not being pregnant than the modesty.

I also have a lot of practice answering the, "do they have the same daddy" questions, which leads to a lot of other questions. Questions about how girls get pregnant. Interestingly, no one has ever asked me how they guys do their half.
post #62 of 486
Originally Posted by 2happymamas View Post
AmandaHope: Talk to your doctor about trying Femara, as opposed to Clomid. According to the RE we use, using Femara has a reduce likelihood of multiple follicles v. Clomid. The RE explained that he usually sees one dominant, better quality follicle when using Femara than the mulitple, not-so-great quality follicles on Clomid.
Thank you for this useful advice! I will!

QOTD 2: I'm very comfortable talking about the process (KD issues, names/labels, even some of the insemination details), though I don't generally describe my cervix or CM to anyone but DP and my two closest friends (one of whom is KD's wife who is dealing with infertility and is all to familiar with the nitty gritty). I did, however, say on Friday to my acupuncturist/chiropractor (who is helping me maximize fertility), that I needed to do cervix-opening visualizations in prep for Saturday's insemination. As I was leaving, he said, "I'll focus my thoughts on your cervix!" He is my age and rather attractive (for a man ), so I was embarrassed.
post #63 of 486
AmandaHope--- You may have just opened up a barrage of u/s questions On what CD would you suggest to u/s, then follow up? Since my DP is an NP, she could order them no problem. I don't have insur, so I'd have to pay, but could possibly get a professional discount, AND it would be comparable to what we're spending on OPKs anyway. I am truly convinced, that our big issue is timing, and if I can just catch that darn egg we'll be in business. (however I do have my questions about the quality of the sample we've been using the last 8 mos, but that's a different post)

Gelly-- SO sorry for your loss, hopefully there will be good news soon.

Judging by how attached I am to the baby I haven't even conceived yet, I don't think I would be a good surrogacy candidate. As much as I would love to be able to give that gift to someone, I just don't think I could do it. Secondly, being an adoptee myself (even though surrogacy is different) I understand that wound that a child feels when they know that the heartbeat that is holding them is not the heartbeat they heard for 9 months.

Im comfortable talking about this whole process with friends who know we are ttc, but that list is very limited. We arent "out" to a lot of my friends and family (lord knows how we'll handle that once Im pg, but that's another bridge), so Im pretty quiet about it for the most part. Ive gone back and forth from being super vocal, to now, not really telling anyone when we are actively trying/inseminating, etc. just to ease some of the pressure.
post #64 of 486
Miss Scarlett Others can weigh in with their experiences, since I've only done u/s for one cycle so far, but my RE (actually the NP) had me come in on CD11, and then I went back in on CD13. That way, the NP could see how fast the follicles were growing. On day 11, my lead follicle was 13mm, and on day 13, it was 17mm, so she proscribed me a trigger to take on the night of day 14 (when the follicle would be 19+mm), and I think I Oed about 24 hours post trigger (though I followed the NP's advice to do the insem at 36 hours post trigger). If you are paying for the u/s, you probably only want to do one u/s, but that could be tricky, bc you do want to see how fast the follicle is growing. They usually grow 1-2mm/day, but the difference between 1 and 2 is a significant difference for timing. The issue is that without the trigger, even if you could figure out when the follicle is mature (19-20mm), you'd still have to try to detect the LH surge in order to get the timing right. If your DP could prescribe the trigger, that would be ideal. I had to pay for mine, and it was $85. I hope all this info helps a bit. Maybe there is research out there about the usual timing gap between the time a follicle is mature and O. I don't know much about that.
post #65 of 486
Wehrli: Thanks for the distracting waiting to O update! I'm glad you're feeling zen! It certainly can't hurt the TTC process, and maybe it can save a bit of your sanity! I hope tomorrow's ultrasound and trigger go just as planned.

AmandaMom: I remain in awe of your awesome temp regularity, and also wanted to acknowledge that you and your DP seem to have the most exciting and fun social lives. I can tell that your wedding trip is going to be super fun!

Indigo: Your poor DP! I hope the abx work fast!

AmandaHope: I love that chiropractor story! I join him in focusing my thoughts on your cervix. Or on implantation, now!

Scarlett: I hope you get the info that you need to make some choices about future cycles! What are your concerns about your sperm?

Library? Bunny? Any news?

AFM: Temps are still high (though not as high as yesterday's spike), though I did post my first morning temp, from when I got up to feed the dogs (sooo ready for my DP to return and take over this early morning task!), and I had another ridiculous 99 that I took after falling back asleep that I discarded because I'd only been sleeping for and hour. The chart as it is is eerily tracking my pregnancy cycle, but I'm starting to wonder if I'm just willing it to be that way! Another BFN this morning, but I'm trying not to worry about it until at least tomorrow (12DPO, when I got my last positive) or beyond...
post #66 of 486
Thread Starter 


beastie, your chart amazes me...

scarlett, i've had only one cycle of monitoring with u/s, as well. but this is what my "cycle instructions" say. u/s on CD3 to make sure there are no cysts left over from last cycle (usually only needed if starting fertility drugs). 2nd u/s is scheduled 4-5 days after last day of clomid (CD11-12). another u/s will be scheduled for 2-3 days later (depending on current size) if follicles aren't mature enough. so my first cycle i had u/s on CD3, CD12 and again on CD15. they told me to trigger that night and come back 36hrs later for IUI. which is good because if i had me wait any longer i would have just o'd on my own on CD17... i got pg that cycle, i m/c but it worked and i try to focus on that positive. so if you have an idea about when you usually O, i would do the u/s just 2-3 days before then. and i agree with AHope, if you can/will do the trigger, DO IT!

QOTD: i am pretty open IRL... probably more than most would prefer. if someone seems uncomfortable, i back off with the details, but i figure if they asked questions, they will get my unadulterated answers! i figure after all we've been through in this process i want to be as helpful as i can to anyone who may benefit from the info!

indigo, my first thought about these gals is that once you agreed to talk about your experience they got intimidated and weren't sure that the party was the place to discuss this info. maybe they are hoping that you can get together in a more intimate setting to discuss this?? that's my worth

afm, back to work today... as i'm sure a lot of you are. BFF is leaving tomorrow night and i'm trying to get enough work done today so i can at least take a half day tomorrow afternoon so i can take her to the airport... but i already have friday off in prep for insem and also to get ready for the RenFaire to open... we've got more painting to do before we open
post #67 of 486
Oops, I forgot to answer the QOTD! I'm pretty open about talking about all elements of TTC, though I'm selective about my audience. I talk all the time with a few queer and straight friends who are themselves in the midst of all this, and also to queer folks gearing up or considering TTC. But I'm not "out" about TTC at work, and I try to minimize the details I share with my and DP's families, just to help them feel more organic about the fact that the hypothetical kid is as much a part of the families as any other kid would be, regardless of conception.

Indigo, I agree with Wehrli that the women at the party might be at the early stage, of wanting to know more but not being quite ready to jump right in. I'd let them set the pace, and then tell them as much as feels comfortable! I know that I had NO IDEA about a lot of fertility stuff before we started TTC, and was amazed at how little I knew, considering that I thought I was pretty in touch with and educated about my body.

Back to work for me too... in the heat. ugh.
post #68 of 486

RE: Sperm concerns. Ill try to make this concise. Okay, so one "sample" from the donor yields many, approx 20, vials for ICI or IUI, right? The very first ICI we did back in October 2008, were the last 3 vials from a particular sample from our donor. We got pregnant (FIRST TIME), and then m/s @ about 6 1/2 weeks. Every subsequent (approx 8) insemination we have done, were all from same donor, but a new sample (all 8 same sample), and nothing. Not one more + hCG. We've done 3 clomid cycles. SO although I have nothing to base it on but my feelings, I wonder about the quality of this sample. I know that with the freezing, thawing processes there are most certainly points that will/can/do damage the quality, and I wonder if something a little screwy happened with this one. I have one vial left from this donor (the one we just had our hearts set on) and it is from the same questionable sample, but its bought & paid for, and he's retired, so we're gonna give it one last go and then we'll have to pick a new donor, but will get the advantage of a new sample...soooo......

AmandaHope & Werli

THANKS!! I could most certainly do the trigger, and at this point, I think the benefits outweigh the risks... Im gonna go with the flow this cycle, and then next, since we'll have to pick a new donor (if we dont get great news from this cycle) I think Ill adopt a whole new process and go for the u/s + trigger. My biggest issue (as Im sure is true for all of you) is that there is SO MUCH conflicting information out there, it is hard to wade through it all. I so much prefer advise, suggestions, information here, from personal experience, over trying to sift through generic medical information.... SO THANK YOU!

Something I have been doing new this cycle, is more meditation. Just a few minutes in the morning before the DP/Doggies wake up, focusing on a bright swirly light going from my heart, to my little ovaries saying GROW little follicles G-R-O-W!!!

post #69 of 486
So I have been goooone for a super long time, and I'm sorry about that. I'm not going to even contemplate trying personals, but I'll jump back in with those in a bit, I promise.

Last month was hard...I was really frustrated with the whole not trying thing, and I was really looking forward to trying again this cycle. Then, I started the new job, and they gave us a HUGE lecture on our benefits and our pre-existing conditions clause during orientation. It kind of freaked me out, so I emailed our benefits coordinator to find out about pregnancy. Of course, she was out of the office and I was supposed to O in the next day or so. So I decided to err on the side of caution and sit out this cycle as well. Sigh. Hopefully she'll tell me it's okay and I can go ahead for next month, but I may end up having to wait until SEPTEMBER!!! ARGH! On the up side, I finally told my sister, with the caveat that she was never to mention it to anyone and she was never to ask me if I was pregnant. I have vague concerns with having told her, though, because her partner and my exDW had an affair long ago. While I don't think they're still speaking, it still worries me a bit.

QOTD 1: I'd love to surrogate for someone close to me. When DW and I first started talking about trying, her BFF said he'd donate for us if I'd carry his as well. The plan was to alternate--one for us, one for him, etc. At this point, I don't think I'd be willing to alternate like that, but after I'm done having mine (two, if I stay single, more if someone else is there to help and wants more), I'd be perfectly happy to do so for close friends or family. I have two sisters, and I know one is fertile, but if the other one and her partner weren't able to carry, I'd volunteer. My mother actually offered to carry for some family friends when I was younger (though they decided to adopt instead), so it's something I've been aware of for a long time.

QOTD 2: I'm with seraf on this one--I'm a nurse, we have to talk about everything anyway. If someone knows I'm trying, then they know pretty much all about it. If they ask, I'll happily tell. They'll stop me if they don't want to hear it!
post #70 of 486
Beastie - Sorry about your BFN this morning, but it's still very early, and your chart looks GREAT! It's funny what you said about my and DP's social lives... we only recently started going out. Very recently, in fact. We moved here a year ago and have had a hard time making friends. We're city girls in a tiny town, and that took some getting used to. There is a nearby "city" where we've been hanging out recently, but it's population is like 120,000, and we're used to *millions*. This past weekend I've been more socially active than I have in the past year, and I think it's because we're not TTC this cycle. That makes me kinda sad, and I just want to go out and forget all about it!

Miss Scarlett - The meditation sounds like a fantastic idea!

chiquitayy - So glad to see you back on the board. I hope you are able to give it a go this cycle!

indigo - I agree with wehrli that maybe that couple was a little shy about approaching you in that setting. Maybe you could take the lead and invite them over sometime? I sure wish someone had done that with us... Which brings me to your QOTD:

I had no problem talking details with my SIL during her visit last month, but she was completely clueless, and it was like I was teaching her. There's another couple in the area who used the same RE, but we haven't gone so far as to discuss CM or anything like that. I probably wouldn't have a problem with it, though. On the other hand, it's certainly not something I bring up to strangers!

Speaking of CM, I've got some EW today... O is coming. DOES ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN GET SOME SPERM?????
post #71 of 486
Hey ladies~

Back home at last~ had a nice weekend seeing my dad and the rest of my family. Also got to meet my cousin's baby Iphigenia, which I found out they're pronouncing 'Eye-phigenia' so it's not only pretentious but incorrect. The scariest thing though is that the baby doesn't seem 'right'. She barely weighs 11 pounds, doesn't move or focus much, and my cousin breast feeds every hour, but the baby throws it all up right afterwards. BUT cousin won't listen to anyone's advice to feed her cereal or maybe formula supplement. She also won't let her hubby hold or feed the baby. It's really weird and kind of scary. I hope it all turns well, but I fear for the baby.

This is such a busy board! Gone for 24 hours and there's so much to respond to! I'll miss many people doing personals now, but I'll be catching up in the near future.

Beastie, it's looking good for you! I love your chart. My temp's still pretty up and is looking excitingly triphasic, but of course I can't assume or even get too excited. We're testing Thursday morning, I believe. I thought about testing this morning but then didn't. I can't stand that blank spot where there should be a line, so if I have to look at it I'm only going to do so when I have to. I also have a hoard of the digital kind that I'm going to pee on when/if I get a positive pink line. I can't stand looking at the NOT PREGNANT, but I'm eager to look at the PREGNANT, so I"m saving them up.

Team Amanda Power! AmandaH~ I'm slightly jealous of your indulging on the 4th. I didn't have as much problem refusing alcohol as I did refusing cokes and cups of coffee without explaining. I just 'wasn't thirsty' a lot, then snuck over and drank water. AmandaM~ wish I had some sperm to offer. Hopefully we'll have one vial left after this SUCCESS CYCLE. If you want a guy who's 6 ft tall and half Portuguese, we might could hook you up! Escher~ thanks for all the good thoughts. Keep those fingers crossed.

Scarlett~ I've never had Clomid, but I've had plenty of Femara and I have found that it made my opks very clear, and when we did the ultrasound the folllies were very clearly present. It was nice to see. I do recommend, if you're looking for the extra boost.

Still dreaming of multiples. I hope my body's telling my mind something...

Sorry for everyone i didn't get to, I'll be better from now on!
post #72 of 486
Hi Everyone,

AmandaMom: Good luck surviving the O without sperm! I agree with you that sitting out a cycle is frustrating. I'm hoping you and I end up being TWW buddies next cycle--the other two Amandas will have already gotten their bfps by then.

Chiquitayy: Nice to hear from you! I'm sorry you're having to deal with waiting--that's no fun! It's neat you were able to tell your sister.

Miss Scarlett: It's exciting that your insem time is coming soon! I hope this is the one for you, and I'm also glad that you have a plan in case it isn't.

Wehrli: I'm sorry that your bff has to leave. I'm so excited that you are going to conceive so soon now!

Beastie: Impressive temps! I look forward to hearing your good news tomorrow.

QOTD: I have a few friends IRL who are also TTC, and I'm willing to discuss things like CM, periods, etc. with them. I am most comfortable talking about what I've learned or generally what I find most helpful, and I prefer not to share a detailed daily account of what my body is doing.

Gellybeangrl: Your temps look great, and I see you're still getting bfns. It could be the progesterone screwing with you, or it could be that you're just going to get your bfp later. Are you going to keep waiting, or get a beta, or something else?

Library: Your chart looks great. I'm keeping everything crossed!

AFM: We're going to visit some of my family tomorrow for almost a week, so I may not have time to post. I'm looking forward to reading all your exciting news whenever I do get near the internet!
post #73 of 486


ok, guys, so we were all off on our reason why the couple didn't come talk to us at the party this weekend.

firstly, they have an "open" relationship...well, the younger of the two is all about the open relationship while the older one is going along with it because she fears she will lose her wife if she doesn't. secondly, the older one is all about having a baby while the younger one has verbally agreed but definitely hesitant about it, especially since she would have to carry - her partner is too old to ttc.

anyways, during the party, the younger one commented to some of the other partygoers how "exotically beautiful" my dp is and the older one spent the remainder of the party keeping her away from my dp!!!!! ok, my dp is beautiful - she is 1/2 filipino, tall, has amazing flawless olive skin and dark asian eyes - but she is in a committed relationship. not to mention we were there as a couple with our kids!

dp said "if she had tried anything i would have knocked her a$$ in the pool".

again, i don't want to offend anyone, but i don't get the open relationship thing. i definitely don't think it's a good idea to bring a child into that mix. dp said "about the time the younger one grows up about relationships is about the time they will be ready for babies".

post #74 of 486
Is this thread like a pot of water? Usually I'm checking all day and it seems like nothing new, then I miss a day and a bazillion posts lol.

I'm about 99.99% sure I'm not pregnant. But I'm still confused. I guess maybe since I ovulated a little late I'm still on a normal schedule? The spotting has increased. Brown/purple. But I usually have horrible cramps leading up to AF, like so bad vicodin can't touch the pain. Now I've been having less cramps than I was several days ago, but my back is still killing me. And why have I been so nauseaus? I mean I'm usually queasy a couple times a year if that, not EVERY day! I guess it's a little less the last few days but still a LOT more than usual.

I don't think I can really catch up much on personals but I'll try a couple.

Um, except that I can't quite remember who was saying what lol.

The ultrasound timing sounds right. For my IVFs I think I started on cycle day 10 and did every other day. I did the trigger on CD 13 and had the egg collection about 24 hours later. I'd say I probably could have gotten away with just CD 11 and 13, but then I knew more what to expect for mine.

That's really interesting about Femara having less multiples chance than Clomid. Isn't Femara also supposed to be less bad for the uterine lining and cervical mucus? Almost makes you wonder why they even still use clomid lol. Though personally, as long as they are all healthy we would LOVE twins or triplets, and I think the risks of more than that are pretty small even with Clomid so I'll probably give it a couple more trys at least.

Indigo that is odd about the couple that wanted to talk with you. I both agree and disagree with you and your partner. I think open relationships can be just as healthy as monogamous and wouldn't judge someone or their ability to parent just based on their monogamy choices. However that's if both partners are happy with those choices, each other, and the decision to parent. It doesn't really sound like the couple you met are in that place.

Oh oops, I meant to answer the QOTDs.

I'm pretty comfortable talking to just about anyone about any and all of the details of TTC. I have to remind myself not to tell people on completely unrelated forums (like interior design) all about my cervical mucus.

I don't think I would ever be a surrogate because I want a huge family and I don't think I'll even have time to have as many kids as I want to have. I mean I'm 32, it takes a while to incubate and I'm not going to wean super early so I figure 1 every 2 years even if we are *super* lucky, unless we like magically get twins or triplets each try lol. I've also thought a lot about donating my eggs. I'm not sure if I could do it. I couldn't now, with infertility. I couldn't give away eggs and have the other person get pregnant and not me. If I already had a bunch of kids maybe I could, like if we use DS and adopt but someday after we have a bunch of kids want to try another IVF with my husband's sperm and I could egg-share to help pay for it or something. Even then I'm not so sure though.
post #75 of 486

Hi Everyone

Hey everyone I'm new to this

My DP and I are TTC this July 2010. We have our donor coming next week for 3x this cycle. I'll be inseminating myself on the 12th\13th because my DP will be in Europe but she'll be inseminating me on the 14th.

To prepare, I am drinking natural organic fennel tea which is said to help aid conception, and I'm taking pre-natal Materna pills. We have TTC last month but I got AF, plus timing was off.

Not charting or anything, I think I'll be able to just get preggers, I'm a fertile 21 y o. I love the support of this group. I'm very frustrated with TTC, it's been my 4th try and I can't wait for the BFP. It's going to be the happiest time of my life and I enjoy reading all your posts!!!

post #76 of 486
Welcome, DykeMom! I hope you get your BFP right away and that your stay on the queer TTC threat is short and sweet. Don't be overwhelmed by the acronyms and all of that; you'll be used to it in no time! I will say that, even though you are 21 and fertile, you might consider charting: it's been the single most helpful thing I've done in TTC, and it gives so much information about timing and also about other elements of your cycle. I'd at least consider temping for a single cycle (taking your temp with a BBT every morning at the same time; lots of us use fertilityfriend online to keep track of things), or even just charting your other indicators without temping, like Bunny is doing. You can see many of our charts through the links on the first page of this thread. The other thing, if you haven't done it already, is to consider reading the Brill Lesbian Conception book. Some of us don't follow all of her suggestions, but I think most of us have benefited one way or another from that. In any case, welcome! I don't mean to sound preachy at all; as everyone here knows, I'm in the final days of my TWW, and am always looking for distractions!

Scarlett: Thanks for sharing your sperm concerns. It does sound like there's a real possibility that that batch was "off," or even just that it was for whatever reason less compatible for your body. But that doesn't mean that this last vial isn't lucky!!! I hope this next IUI is the one! It would be so great if you'd wasted time worrying about the next level of interventions! And, at the same time, it must feel good to have a solid plan in place. Your meditation sounds so lovely, I may just have to borrow your imagery!

Wehrli: Sorry that your BFF has to go, but at least you have a short work week. I can't wait to hear more about your Ren faire weekend... I know it's old hat for you guys, but it's so interesting to me!

AmandaMom: LOL about your sperm search! But seriously, I hope you get to enjoy your seriously kick a$$ social life for a bit, have an incredible wedding, and then promptly get your BFP the very next month.

Library: Welcome home! Meeting Iphegenia sounds stressful, but I think you were right to take a step back and let them sort things out. Still, it's hard not to worry... In more positive news, I'm totally impressed by your ability to hold off on testing until Thursday. At this point, I'll basically pee on anything that doesn't move. Not that that's given me any BFPs! I hope you get your (fancy digital) BFP super soon!

Escher: Safe travels! Have fun with your family. You'll be missed here!

Indigo: At least now you know! I'm glad that they weren't avoiding you because of anything about you guys. That said, I should throw out there that DP and I have always had a technically open relationship (I say technically because there have been very few, almost no, times that we've used that option). And we've been in a committed relationship for seven years now, married for two, having survived a million super big life events together. So I wouldn't let one immature couple with what sounds like real communication problems be the model for all open relationships! For us, it keeps us both aware that we're in our relationship because we chose it, every single day, and we put in plenty of work negotiating and checking in about our boundaries and comfort zones (for instance, no hitting on people in monogamous relationships, who are our mutual friends, at random pool parties that we're attending as a couple! Yikes!).

Bunny: I think we're just all back online because it's Monday. But it is refreshing after the weekend. I'm sorry that you're not feeling pregnant, but I'll hold out that 0.01% hope until AF is there for real! Just in case, do you have any plans for the next cycle?

Chiquitayy: Welcome back! I'm sorry it's been such a hard month. Your story about your new job brought up some issues that I've been thinking about a lot lately, so you've inspired me to ask a new QOTD:

QOTD: If you plan to work during/after your pregnancy, how do you think your job will take the news? What kind of environment will it be when you are pregnant and/or nursing and/or parenting? What, if any, kind of leave are you planning to take?

Phew! That got really long, so I'll answer my own QOTD later. AFM: no news. Starting to fear that my high temps are from the heat wave rather than anything in my body. I did feel a little bit nauseous this afternoon, though, right in the middle of running a reading group... FX for a BFP tomorrow or Thursday? Unless my body is incredibly cruel, I should know one way or the other by Friday...
post #77 of 486
Just did another test and still -. WTH is going on? I'm still just spotting. I'm just scared why it wouldn't have worked. I mean I know I respond well to the meds, I know my eggs fertilize even with dead sperm lol, I was on clomid, how could at least ONE not have stuck? I'm worried there may be something else wrong but I don't really know what it could be.

My husband already has time schedule off work so I guess I'd better reserve a hotel room. It sucks also because it's a loooong boring drive, and not somewhere we'd ever choose to vacation.

I don't know if I should change anything we did, like timing or method or anything or not. I think we did everything right but there's no real way of knowing I guess.

Scarlett I thought I'd read that each sample is split up into like 3 vials, not like 20, but I don't know. I know some have better post thaw numbers than others.
post #78 of 486
QOTD - I work in a nursing home. There's something in the water, there are minimally 4 girls pregnant at any given moment. The attitude won't be problematic so much as the actual environment. When someone gets shingles, pregos don't enter the room, for example. No one nurses. Well, there was 1 girl who did and 3 who tried. Out of maybe 15 or 20 babies who have been born while I was there? I have short term disability insurance, they will pay for 4 weeks off for a vaginal birth. I'm planning to take 12, since that's what I am legally allowed and still guaranteed the same position. Big however is, I am thinking about opening a home daycare. LOL. So if I don't get around to it before I take maternity, that will be when I make the transition.

DykeMom-I second Beastie, Charting is good. When I was 21 and 24, I got pregnant every time I timed it right, and, well, the only way to know if I timed it right is by charting. Charting isn't as scary as it seems. I just took my temperature every morning and peed on sticks for a couple of days in the middle.

post #79 of 486

chart stalking

Beastie Boo to the BFN this morning. Even though you got your positive at 12dpo last time, you may need another day or two this time. Your temps are still looking great! You must be really miserable... s

Bunny s for you, too. I'm sorry that AF showed up after so many weird days of spotting. What a confusing cycle! I hate to say it, but it may not have worked simply because even when you do everything right, the majority of the time, it just doesn't take. For all the science, it is still a pretty mysterious process. Maybe the egg or sperm in question weren't quite right, or perhaps something went awry in early cell division. There is a lot of luck involved. Hang in there. It *willl* happen for you!

Gelly More s! Blah for the BFN. But as long as AF stays away, there is still a chance, right?

Library ARE YOU TESTING THIS MORNING? Your chart looks perfectly triphasic, and we need a BFP around here! Go team! I'm so so hopeful for you.

QOTD As for maternity leave, my employer technically doesn't have much, but I can spread out my sick days and 2 weeks of disability leave. I also have two fantastically supportive bosses/chairs (since I'm cross-appointed in two departments) and am reasonably certain that I'll be able to teach only one of my usual two courses without taking a pay hit. So if I get preggo this cycle, I'll be due in mid-March, and I'd teach only one class next spring, which only meets once/week. So it would be pretty sweet. If I get preggo next month, I'd be due so close to the end of the semester that I'd probably try to wing it, teaching both classes in the spring and using the sick leave for the fall, so that I'd only have one class (2-3 days/week, though) while the babe is little. The perfect timing would be September conception for an early May birth; that keeps me going when I feel like this is taking forever. The perfect timing is still two cycles away!

I had my post-O ultrasound today. Surprise, surprise, I did ovulate! There was a very floppy follicle on the right side, where the mature follicle was last week. The annoying thing is that I'm now supposed to have my consult with the RE, but his first appointment was on the 27th! So the NP will look at my chart and make recommendations for next time if this one doesn't work out. The other bad news is that the nurse had never heard of Femara (the follicle stimulating drug that 2HappyMamas suggested produces fewer multiples than Clomid). They use Follistim. Anyone know anything about that? Sigh.
post #80 of 486
Hey ladies~

Miserable morning. My temp plummeted to 97.17 and even though I haven't tested I feel for sure this means it's over. I stayed in bed for hours this morning because I was too sad to make myself wake up and get going. I mean, it was a chilly night and I guess it could still be positive, but I have zero hopes now. I'll test tomorrow, at 14 dpo, but I'll bet you a nickel it's a negative. WTF? My chart just looked magical, like I was really doing something right this time, but of course it's nothing we can DO, eh? I felt like I was too early at the outset and I'll bet it turns out I'm right. So I'm completely sad and discouraged today, without even peeing on anything.

Dykemom~ Welcome! I'm going to second or third the idea of charting. It's easy and actually very interesting to see your body work. I think it's especially beneficial for lezzies like us who don't usually have constant, on-demand access to fresh swimmers.

Beastie~ sorry you're not getting the indicators you want. Did you test today? Any news?

Bunny~ UGH!!! The negs are so horrible, and spotting makes it worse. After my low temp this morning I went to the bathroom fully expecting to see AF, but nothing. Nothing but the progesterone, which should hold it off for a few more days. I hope you get the best news soon xoxo

AmandaH~ Thanks for your encouragement. I so want to give the team a BFP. I wish I knew something about Follistim that I could tell you, but I've always been a Femara gal.

QOTD~ I work in an elementary school and it'll be no problem for me to get the time away. I think this school, this group of ladies (and we are all ladies except for the PE teacher) would be excited and supportive. I'm out to them, so I know there would be a million curious questions about how we did it, but that would be fine too. If this cycle works, the kiddo would be due in March, which would be perfect. I could take March, April, May for maternity leave and then have June July and August as bonus maternity leave. It's yet another reason I was hoping for a BFP this time around, though now my hopes are pretty much dashed.

DP is at work this morning and I haven't even told her the news. Ugh ugh ugh.
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