Terrified of bathtime

[shnitzel]

My one year old is suddenly terrified of the bath. It has been an escalation of fear. Two weeks ago she would cry when washing her hair then in the
middle of her bath then when visiting my parents as soon as she heard the word bath. When she got home a week ago she was fine but now she is terrified to the point that she is inconsolae as soon as we undress her or she hears the tap. She loves the sprinkler at the park and runs in fearlessly.

I have been getting into the bath with her and dh is hugging her at the same time but she still cried so hard she threw up. We drained the tub and I held her at the edge of the shower which was marginally better.

I don't want to torture her but if we give into her fear I am scared it wi escalate even more. I don't see what more we can do.

[HeliMom]

aww poor thing... If she is crying so much she's throwing up then there is something she is desperately trying to tell you, though I have no idea what it is.

what about just running a tub for you with her in the bathroom? bring some toys/ book for her to keep herself occupied on the floor while you bathe? Maybe you can talk about what you are doing "mommy is scrubbing her arms" Maybe play a bit in the water.
Help her see that the bath can be run but no one will force her. Let her make her way over to the tub at her own pace.

If she's fine with the sprinkler you can clean off mostly with that if she really needs a wash. Or a sponge bath could work too.

We wash hair with a washcloth because my DD won't put her head up and if I pour water over her head it gets in her eyes and is very unpleasant. We also use California baby leave in conditioner because rinsing twice with the washcloth isn't worth it to me.

[Vancouver Mommy]

We went through a phase like this also. It only lasted a few weeks and I didn't make her get into the tub. It was winter though which made it easier. We made do with sponge baths. She was about 18 months and had very little hair.

[Artichokie]

we had this issue last summer, when dd was 1 1/2. What finally solved it was a fortunate happenstance - we spent a week over the summer with my extended family, including dd's cousin who was 5 at the time. My DD ADORES her and watched her take a bath (with the cousin's permission) for a couple of days in a row. Then we had them bathe together for the remainder of the week. Issue solved! M DD went from hysterical tears at the word "bath" to BEGGING for one. LOL, my dd also potty trained herself after seeing her cousin use the toilet every day. Definitely the most successful vacation ever!

[MelW]

Both of mine have done this, too. My oldest didn't bathe for about two months, my youngest has only taken a week off then went back to it happily. Luckily, both have showered with me when they were on their "bath strike". If she loves the sprinkler, you might try a shower instead. I stopped offering or trying with the oldest, until one day she was really messy from painting and I offered to let her play in the tub...and to my surprise she did.

[tinybutterfly]

We went through this, too, with ds#2 when he was little. I did sponge baths or filled a tiny plastic washtub with water to bath him in while he stood up. I'd sometimes fill the bath then put toys in it for him to play with while he stayed OUTSIDE the tub. It was playtime, not bathtime and I didn't try to get him in the bath for a long time. I can't remember how long it lasted, awhile, but he eventually got back into the tub. It was slow and gradual.

I don't think it's giving in to her fear. It's listening to her. She is afraid.



P.S. To wash his hair I used this little plastic bowl, laid him back on a beach towel and used a wash cloth to wet his hair, then shampooed it, then used the washcloth to rinse. Not ideal, but we managed.

[shnitzel]

Thank you all for your wonderful ideas they were extremely helpful!
Today she really needed a bath, combo of banana, peach, macaroni and cheese, and vomit and she smelled really awful. We decided to try having me take a bath while she played with DH in the washroom and it worked wonderfully. When she heard the water running the tears started but when I got in and not her she calmed down. She played with the toys and the soap and then the water and then climbed into the tub! I also nursed her in the tub so I am hoping she has more positive assosciations with bath time.

I don't think we are over this yet but at least she was ok today.
I wanted to keep pushing her b/c I am worried her fear will grow, I had friends in high school who were terrified of water.

[j_p_i]

My 13 month old has been going through this phase also. Went from loving baths to screaming when we'd put her in. The first time it happened we were almost scared, is the water too hot?? Too cold? She cried like she was in pain so we just took her out.

Since then she won't really sit in the tub, but will stand and mostly let us wash her (it's now a two-person job!). It's not the water she is afraid of, since she loves being in her little pool outside, loves playing in the dogs water, etc.

It has helped us to play with toys, give her a little bucket or something to splash the water around. Also glad this seems to be a relatively common phase, though I have no idea what brought it on! I'm glad to hear the most recent bath was better for you!

[shnitzel]

My daughter's fear was so scared this morning that she was crying hysterically at a sponge bath in the sink.

jpi is your daughter going through an emotional/sensitive stage also?
Lately DD has been crying about everything and getting insulted easily so I wonder if the too issues are related. She started sobbing yesterday b/c I screamed "No DD" when she came at me with dirty hands and ducked.

[lemonapple]

Ds is going through a phase like this right now. He used to take the longest. Baths ever, but will scream as though we're butchering him whenever we attempt one now. It's been a little over two weeks now and mostly we're following his lead and not forcing anything.

Unfortunately, he does have masses of hair!!

[littlebabydoll]

We solved our bath fear simply buy calling the water "warm" not "hot", because hot is bad, right? (ie, stove, fire, etc)

It took us a week or so to figure that one out though!

[CookAMH]

That sounds like great progress!! I am happy to hear it. I think you got lots of good tips. My 14DS marches gleefully into the bathroom for a bath, but you never know, this could happen to him so I will keep these tips in mind.

[colleentara]

My DS is 25 months and has been screaming about the bath for just the last two weeks. I have to get in with him. Sometimes he's fine, but other times he acts like he's scared. He says 'Ow", but I can't find anything that is hurting him. I don't get it. He says 'ow' a lot when he just doesn't want to do something, so my guess is that he's scared? He used to love the bath.
I'm sorry that I don't have any suggestions-- just able to commiserate.

[djenya]

DS has gone through several phases where he won't bathe. At fist we were able to get him take a shower instead, but sometimes even that doesn't work. At 3, we still have days when he doesn't bathe, but the less we push it, the quicker he comes back to wanting it.