weaning

[MrsBone]

I'm trying to wean my DS, slowly, of course, and we are down to nap-time and bedtime, and overnight. He used to nurse every time I'd sit down, so this is pretty good in my eyes. The trickiest thing I'm finding for the future is how to wean them off of nursing to sleep? I can't even fathom it..that and cutting out the night nursing. My DS is 18 mo. and sleeps in our bed about half the night, and his bed the other half. I'd like him to be completely weaned by the time he's 2, so I'm willing to go slow. Any tips?

[dividedsky]

i posted my experience elsewhere, copying + pasting as i think you may find it helpful. feel free to ask questions! i was dreading it so much but it really wasn't horrible. wrote this mid-june and they are still sleeping through the night!!

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i just night weaned (which was the last to go, so they're fully weaned now) my nearly 17 month-old twins about 3 weeks ago. it really didn't go too badly at all, and i feel like the timing was actually very good for all three of us.

they got to the point where i could tell that being nursed to sleep (or back to sleep) wasn't always doing it for them anymore. it was definitely a prop, but not for the better. what had worked before ceased to work for them, and it was time for a change.

one of my guys was always an ok sleeper, the other one woke a billion times a night. one night i found myself in bed with two restless, nursing on-and-off boys who just couldn't get their very overtired selves to sleep. and i was totally crawling out of my skin with the popping on and off... it was clear that it was just not working anymore...

anyway...

i decided that night that that was the end of it. for the next couple of days i tried to keep them REALLY busy during the day so they'd be nice and tired at night. that got them to the point where they were falling asleep on their own finally... though they were up pretty late fighting it for the first couple of nights. they weren't sad or crying really, i think they just didn't really know how to mellow out without nursing. i read to them for a while and hung out with them in bed until they fell asleep eventually. those nights i tried not to nurse them back to sleep when they woke, but gave in maybe once when one of my kiddos was up for like 3 hours in the middle of the night... which was fine.

anyway.

every night got better and better. 3 weeks later, they're sleeping through the night consistently.

[MrsBone]

that's awesome! I'm totally dreading it, b/c the first time I tried to nightwean, I did it cold turkey and at the same time was trying to get him to sleep in his crib all night at 12 months old. He fought it big time. DH and I were up with him for 3 hours straight before I finally gave in and nursed him. I'm definitely feeling encouraged now!

[BigBen]

I am having a tough time weaning. I am cutting back slowly and have recently cut out the nap time nursing. The ones that remain are the bedtime and the early morning 4/5am nursing. I know my son (16 months) can fall asleep on his own, he does at nap time. He feels secure enough in his own crib so I don't even know if the bedtime will be an issue to cut out. I actually think it will be way more tough on me :( The one I am scared of cutting out is the early morning one. If I really want my son to go right back to sleep I nurse him and I'm back in bed within 15 min. but sometimes I try to simply lie him back down and let him fall back asleep on his own. Sometime this works and sometimes it doesn't. He has rarely if ever gone back to bed and slept through until morning. Unless I nurse him he won't sleep until we all wake up in the morning. Should I give it a good week or two of putting him down and that's that or should I continue nursing him in the morning until he feels he's ready to sleep through. My goal is for him to sleep through the night and be weaned by 18 months. Any advice on cutting out the morning weaning would be greatly appreciated... 

[CrunchyChristianMama]

My DD didn't nurse to fall asleep, so I'm not sure how to help you there, but I did wean her at 23 months when I was about 8 months pregnant.  I had her down to first thing in the morning and sometimes right after she woke up from her nap.  My DH and I decided we wanted to do a couple night get-away before the new baby arrived, so we had my MIL come stay with her for a couple days.  When we got back she occasionally asked to nurse, but it seemed like those couple of days without it (and the fact that I had basically no milk) got her out of the habit. 

[Piratelady2525]

Originally Posted by BigBen 

I am having a tough time weaning. I am cutting back slowly and have recently cut out the nap time nursing. The ones that remain are the bedtime and the early morning 4/5am nursing. I know my son (16 months) can fall asleep on his own, he does at nap time.

This is exactly where we are!  Time, age, everything.  Im thinking that I will take out the morning session, and try really hard to just get him back to sleep without nursing, at least for a little while.  I think we can do it!  My biggest concern at this point is actually that my breasts, which still produce an awful lot of milk for someone who only nurses 2-3 times in a 24 hour period, will be engorged and painful.  I also am thinking that the weekend away idea would be really good...DS stays with grandma for the night occasionally, and doesnt have any milk while there, just nurses when I come to pick him up.  So maybe if he went 2 days with grandma, spoiled and happy and distracted, he would stop altogether?  Anyone have a similar story or tips?
 

[Baimbermomma]

I am in the same boat as you guys! I am trying to wean my son off of several night time feedings and early morning feedings so he can sleep in his own crib for the ENTIRE night! I wish someone would post some good advice to make this happen more easily!!!

[annan617]

I just weaned my 2.5 year old a few weeks ago and I was dreading it, which was why I waited so long to do it. I am pregnant and my milk has dried up and I just didn't feel comfortable dry nursing her, it made me cringe so much that it got to the point where I really needed to do it for my sanity. We had got into a routine of only nursing to sleep at nap times and bed times. I had night weaned her a few months ago where I just picked her up and cuddled her and then put her back in the crib, she cried but I held her hand and wouldn't leave her, it lasted for 30 minutes the first night, 5 minutes the second and after that she slept through most nights. if she did wake up then I would hold her hand till she went back to sleep. The other times we nursed, for nap and for bed I made sure that we nursed in the same spot every time, the chair in her room-I did this for quiet awhile. Then when I decided to wean we took the chair out of the room and put it in the basement. We explained that she was a big girl now and she didn't need to nurse to sleep anymore. we then held hands with her dolls and my husband and I all pretended to fall asleep with her and said that we all hold hands thats how we fall asleep now. When it was time, we had about 15 minutes of tears and then she fell asleep-I was amazed- I really thought it was going to be really hard. After that we have had a few times where she has cried for a bit but now its great. I have to sit by the bed and hold her hand while she falls asleep but I knew I had to replace the nursing with something else. Its a good start. Good luck!

[Piratelady2525]

the holding hands is a great idea!  I wish it would work for my DS...I tried a couple times last week to just cuddle, rock, etc with him in the middle of the night when he woke up instead of nursing, and both times we ended up being awake for about 3-3 1/2 hours.  It was torture.  Since then, he has woken up more than his normal once a night to nurse.  I feel like I ruined it!  I dont know what to do now.  Im getting so sick of nursing (sorry thats harsh, but Im feeling really "touched out").