Where to go from here?

[Thing1Thing2]

Ok, so DS was EC'd at 21 months and then almost fully potty learned at 22 months (day and night). He was wearing underwear, he would tell me when he had to go, and had a dry diaper 6 nights of the week.

He is now 25months and since then we had a move to a new house about a week ago, and it's all been downhill from there.

He no longer tells me when he has to go, just goes in pants or if he's naked just goes on the floor. He will say "mama pee pee " as it is already coming out! He always does poop on the potty though.

It seems to me that he has lost his ability to "feel" the sensation of having to go. Is that possible? And since I feel uncomfortable using bribes, we are ECing now again.

I have to leave him with his grandmother next week, and I am afraid to put him in a diaper - yet, she has no clue about EC...

Help!!! I just need a little reassurance.

[Thing1Thing2]

Just reading some previous threads... could this be a "potty strike" or "potty pause"? From what I understand, 25 months is old enough to know when he is about to pee.

Maybe I should get training pants or maybe he wants to learn how to pee standing up?

Any advice appreciated!

[lisavark]

Hey, my DD was EC'd from two weeks on, in underwear and staying dry all day from 13 months on, and then on her second birthday she suddenly decided that she did NOT need to be reminded EVER and started peeing on the floor all the time. Now a few months later, she's a grad and takes initiative (or even takes herself!) 99% of the time. I did use some bribes to get there, although I felt uncomfortable about it too. It wasn't really "if you stay dry then you can have a treat" bribe; it was just "do you want to use the potty and then have a treat?" thing. Because I knew she needed to go, and she just wasn't interested.

But your DS is probably just discombobulated by all the changes, I bet. He might also just be experimenting with his control a little in preparation for being able to hold it longer. I used trainers for our little pause...

How long will he be with his grandmother? If it's only a week, then personally I'd get some trainers and just make sure she changes them every time they're wet, if she's opposed to helping him use the potty or has a big issue with misses. But at this age there's a lot of overlap between EC and conventional potty learning, too, so she might be perfectly willing to "EC" him by reminding/encouraging him to use the potty at regular intervals...

[Thing1Thing2]

Originally Posted by lisavark

Hey, my DD was EC'd from two weeks on, in underwear and staying dry all day from 13 months on, and then on her second birthday she suddenly decided that she did NOT need to be reminded EVER and started peeing on the floor all the time. Now a few months later, she's a grad and takes initiative (or even takes herself!) 99% of the time. I did use some bribes to get there, although I felt uncomfortable about it too. It wasn't really "if you stay dry then you can have a treat" bribe; it was just "do you want to use the potty and then have a treat?" thing. Because I knew she needed to go, and she just wasn't interested.

But your DS is probably just discombobulated by all the changes, I bet. He might also just be experimenting with his control a little in preparation for being able to hold it longer. I used trainers for our little pause...

How long will he be with his grandmother? If it's only a week, then personally I'd get some trainers and just make sure she changes them every time they're wet, if she's opposed to helping him use the potty or has a big issue with misses. But at this age there's a lot of overlap between EC and conventional potty learning, too, so she might be perfectly willing to "EC" him by reminding/encouraging him to use the potty at regular intervals...

Thanks for helping lisavark! I didn't know if anyone was going to reply and I have been going crazy trying to figure out what to do. I put him in some "pull ups" for the day because I didn't want him wetting himself in the childrens church.

It's good to know that your lo went through the same thing. At least I know I didn't do something wrong. I mean, its true I haven't been able to give him the attention he needs lately and maybe that has to do with it in part. I'm going to start spending more time with him this coming week and let the housework sit.

I hope you're right about him possibly experimenting with control. It would make sense. For instance, today I asked him if he had to go and he said no and then not more than a minute later - peed in his pants and the carpet.

My husband said maybe we should start making it like we are upset when he does this, so that he understands. I don't think this is the way to go about it though... and even though Im in the middle of reading "unconditional parenting", I might do a little bribery like you mentioned.

He was supposed to be with his grandmother for one day, all day this week... but I think I am going to cancel because I feel wierd sending him there in trainers or pull ups after they made such a big deal about him being PL'ed so early. And they don't like my parenting style at all - so this was the one area I felt like they were happy about. Not that it should influence me so much but it does ykwim?

[Thing1Thing2]

Just want to update everyone. I spent alot of time with DS this week and so far he hasn't had an accident in 2 days! I probably just jinxed myself, but I just wanted to let everyone know that I think it was related to the adjustment and needing more Mommy time.

Someone on here said something that helped me "it's not so much about the NOT communicating, but it's more about what the accidents ARE communicating."

Thanks for the help!