Mom There During Birth? This may be long. - Page 2

[RedOakMomma]

We can't trust my ILs to be a safe/reasonable part of the birth experience, and so yeah...as someone mentioned...this time they will hear about it all AFTER the baby is born. They don't expect to be part of the labor, but they do seem to expect to be part of the labor "help" (taking care of our other kids, etc.). After their nightmarish flaking out/disruption LAST time I was in labor? Nope. We've agreed they won't get a phonecall until after the baby is born. It's sad, and not ideal, but our first priority is to focus on the baby and ourselves and our family...not to make other (previously unstable or destructive) people happy.

[Grace and Granola]

Originally Posted by FurElise19

This is brilliant! Thank you. Not to demean anyone else, but I had been thinking of my aunt as the one who could help me after DD was born, but she's so good at dealing with my mother. How did I not think of this before? Thank you!!

[MamaPhD]

For DD's birth, it was just my DH and I at the hospital and I really loved how it was such a bonding experience for us! My parents wanted to be there but I bit the bullet and told them we will call when we needed them. DH ended up taking 5 weeks off work, which was an unbelievable luxury we ran into and we called my parents to come during the last week of that leave! Those month of just me, DD and DH spent mostly in our bed was THE MOST PRECIOUS TIME EVER IN MY LIFE!!!! I know my parents were sad but man I have no regrets whatsoever!!!

[happysmileylady]

Another suggestion, should your mom run out of people to call or whatever, is to make her your "runner" (along with your aunt of course.) Tell her you forgot to get a package of diapers or a special onsie for babie's first day or you ran out of milk and didn't have the chance to pick any up or whatever set of errands you need (or don't need). That way she feels needed, but she's also out of your hair.