hello, i am new to this forum so i'll provide a brief background. my husband and his ex met and got pregnant in city A. during the pregnancy, they moved to city B so husband could finish school. they divorced when my SS was 6 months and ex moved herself and SS to city C, about 7 hours away. my husband stayed in city B to finish school. when he finished, he was only able to find work back in city A. A and C are about 5 hours apart and a short direct flight. my husband and i met in city A when SS was almost 3 and we married when he was 6. he is now 9. we have a new son who is almost 2. we have had regular twice a month with SS and longer visits in the summer (4 weeks). overall, although there was tension in the beginning, things are fairly calm with visitation and we and the ex try to accomodate each other. the issue is this: the ex has now decided that she wants to move back to city B. it would be a stretch but we could do it and maintain somewhat regular visitation (maybe down to once a month). my hesitation, however, is that there's a guy in the background. ex has been engaged twice in the last 3 years; in each time she met the guy and within month was engaged. and within months, broke it off. that's actually what happened with my husband but they got pregnant. the breaking off of the last engagement was tough on my SS. we were pregnant and he was really hoping his mom would marry and have a baby too so he could have more siblings (he'd been dying for a sibling for years)--one here, and one there. my SS has told us about this guy and that he lives in city B. so i am concerned that ex wants to move only to be with the guy and will repeat the pattern of breaking up after a few months. there's no doubt she loves her kid more than anything, but she's also exposed him now to 2 broken engagements within a relatively brief period. and i should also add that SS thriving in city C--excellent grades, lots of friends, grandparents nearby. she doesnt know we know about the guy. our custody agreement provides that my husband can refuse permission for the move. but should he? should he ask about the rel with the guy? there's really nothing for me to do--but he asks for my input. if it werent for her history, this probably would nt be as much of a concern. but i hate to think of SS being uprooted for nothing. am i overreacting?
post #1 of 2
7/7/10 at 4:08pm