Noisy children

[Momtotwo2004]

This will be my 4th child and 1st homebirth. I'm nervous that the regular noises my children make, if they are awake during the labor/birth, will become a huge annoyance to me. It sounds stupid but I hadn't thought about this at all until just recently and I'm 32 weeks. :/

I do have some things planned for childcare. I have a friend who offered to come but I know that something could always come up and she might not be able to make it. I also could call my parents but they have a 3 hour drive. I have neighbors who, if they are home, would help out and other friends who would take the children to their home (but I want them here for the birth if they want to be here.)

I can also send the children out back to play in our fenced yard and if my oldest child is home, he can bring the kids to the park next door.

So I do have plans....but I'm just so USED to a hospital setting where I didn't have to think about this. I'm really worried it'll screw up my relaxation.

What sort of experiences have others had? Were you concerned about the children's noise? Did it become a problem?

[dogmom327]

One thing to keep in mind is that there is a very good chance the birth will happen at night when your children are asleep. I was worried about DS (then just 2 yo) and that he'd be upset but my MW kept assuring me that as mammals, humans are naturally more prone to give birth at night and that she had seen many mom's with children who would have contractions during the day but not really get a pattern going until their children were in bed and it's like their bodies really got going at that point.

No guarantees of course but things do have a way of working out (DD was born literally 5 minutes and two contractions after DS woke up at 7:47 am--about an hour later than he usually slept--perfect!).

[bjorker]

dd1 is 5 and is a huuuuuuuuge talker, and I was afraid she'd distract me at the worst of times. Still, I really wanted her there for the birth, so I took the chance. I did notice her chattering and asking questions even though I had told her that I needed it quiet when I was having the baby, but it wasn't that big of a deal. I guess you have to determine what is more important to you, the possibility that you might be distracted by your kids, and how much you want them there. If you think they'll listen to you and go play in the yard or with neighbours if you need your concentration, then that sounds like a good plan to me. dd's chattering didn't completely ruin my concentration, but there were points that I was annoyed. I wouldn't change anything about her being there, though.

[Peony]

My last baby was #3 for us so I had a 6y and 2y running around the house. The whole give birth at night thing has never worked out for me, instead it is earlier in the day when children are well rested and noisy. So I plan for it, I set up the tub away from everyone where I have the option of closing the door. I made the mistake of setting it up in the living with DD2, bad, bad decision, I ended up hiding in the bedroom away from the little voice chattering on forever instead of soaking in my water. While I adore their little voices on most days, while I am in labor, they sound more like finger nails on a chalkboard to me.

I stockpile activities that DH can get out if need be and I have someone come over that is solely responsible for child wrangling.

[Youngfrankenstein]

I had no problems. We had #4 at home with our 10,9, and 5 year olds at home. They just were in the other room most of the time and with being in labor, I truly wasn't distractable.

[elus0814]

This has been a big concern for me too. I had thought about having them there but have decided that they would be too distracting so I'm now in the process of trying to find someone to watch them. I've found that I'm very easily overwhelmed in labor and I'm not totally comfortable with the kids being in the room during the birth. I know it will be upsetting, for the oldest at least because she is very sensitive. Our youngest will not even be a year and a half and is very attached to me so another concern is that he will spend much of the time crying for me to hold him and DH will have to hold him constantly and I'll be out of luck having him for a birth partner.

[clovergirl]

My first homebirth, my daughter was 4yrs old and she slept until about 15min before the baby was born. When she woke up she sat quietly with my husband and watched. We did have a couple of (childless) friends lined up to come take her out of the apartment if needed, but it turned out we didn't.

Second homebirth, my kids were 6.5yrs and 2.5yrs. We planned for our good friend/upstairs neighbor (an honorary auntie to my kiddos, she went to college with my husband) take the girls upstairs if needed. And that's exactly what happened. I went into labor at about 5am and we called her at 6:30 to let he know I was in labor and when the girls woke up we'd like them to go upstairs. She came down to get them around 7:30. Baby born about 2hrs later.

For me, I know I birth better with quiet and solitude. The girls kept coming in to check on me before they went upstairs, which was very sweet, but also distracting. If I was to ever have another birth I think I would once again plan for someone to come take the kids out of the house if they were awake.

But that's just me, everyone has different needs. If it's important to you to have the option, then make plans now. Secure a second and third person to come help out with your kids, in case the person you have lined up doesn't work out. You never know though, you could get deep into labor land and have it not bother you at all. I'd recommend having options available if needed though.