Harry Potter - Page 2

[Ruthla]

I got into the series when pg with DS, then purchased the whole series when book 5 came out. The girls were in 2nd and 3rd grade at the time. DD2 started reading the series that year (yup, she read book 5 in 2nd grade!), and a few months later DD1 wanted to know what all the fuss was about. Since then, we've all become HP fans.

DS isn't quite at the reading level his sisters were at this age (meaning he's actually reading on grade level, not 4 grades ahead) but enjoys the movies. For a while, DD2 was reading HP to him, but they got off track (right about the scene where Harry, Ron, and Hermione battle the troll in the bathroom) and I don't know if they will restart or not. I don't think he'll be capable of reading the books independently before 5th or 6th grade- but he could surprise me.

As far as maturity, I think the first two books are appropriate for the average 6yo or 7yo, if they have the patience to sit and read/listen and pay attention. The books do get more mature and complex as Harry grows up. There's no overt sex in the books (though quite a bit of kissing in books 5 and 6) and all the violence is pretty "clean". There's a "torture spell" that hurts without causing any physical damage and a killing spell that just makes people fall over dead.

All my above advice is aimed at helping parents decide whether or not to share HP with their own kids. I think the OP should let her ex and his new wife decide when their DD will read the books, even if it means that her DD can't share them with her half-sister for a few more years. It seems like they're setting up an unhealthy dynamic, and you should try and stay out of it as much as possible.

[eepster]

Originally Posted by Ruthla

There's no overt sex in the books (though quite a bit of kissing in books 5 and 6) and all the violence is pretty "clean". There's a "torture spell" that hurts without causing any physical damage and a killing spell that just makes people fall over dead.

I wouldn't say all the violence is clean. Think of George's ear, the werewolf who attacks Bill, what happened to Dumbledor's hand, Mad-eye-moody's magic eye being hung on a door, and of course the Dementors. Those things are pretty grizzly and scary.

[koby58]

I stay out of my ex's life as much as possible - I'm only posting this because DD2 asked me too. If she is making a decision she wants to make as informed of one as possible.

As for the unhealthy dynamic - it's already been created and there's really nothing I can do about it besides talk to my DD's about their feelings and ways to try and stay objective.

R is apparently very easily upset, but not easily frightened. (As in, she watches Cold Case with her father but cries when animals are hurt.)

DD2 gave them her suggestion: wait until she was eight (six months) and let her read the first book. If she continues (which, R has the same book taste as DD2 did, so she will) she should reach the final book at around nine. They told her 'thanks for the suggestion, they'd keep it in mind.' Which is fine, better actually, because it's their daughter. Nonetheless it's frustrating that DD2 spent a few days worrying about this for nothing.

[Girlprof]

I'm sorry that your daughter is being put in this position. That's not appropriate and it's a bummer that it's out of your control.

I've been independently interested in the question of how much HP at what age. It was easier when not all the books were out yet!

We tried reading the first book out loud when DS was pretty young and he couldn't sustain an interest. Then he asked a few months ago as someone who had just turned 6. We said yes and I read most of book one to him. Then his reading skills took off and he read a huge chunk of book 2 by himself. I started reading it out loud to him at some point and we've shifted over to that, which I am more comfortable with. Basically, he got distracted by the Wimpy Kid so Harry took a back seat.

I decided this was a great excuse for me to re-read the HP books, ha, ha! So, he is in the middle of book 2 and I am in the middle of book 4. I agree w/everyone that book 4 is where things get scary. DS handled Star Wars (not #3) just fine, but was freaked by Meet the Robinsons, so it's a bit unpredictable what might set him off. Once he gets to book 4, I will either try to read it to him or try to distract him with some Wimpy Kid equivalent for awhile.

[ollyoxenfree]

Originally Posted by koby58

DD2 was about seven/eight, but the books came out as she grew up. Her issue lies with basically anything past book three. Whereas she was 14/15 when the final book came out, if her sister reads them quickly she might only be eight by the time she gets to book seven. (I don't really remember the books, but this is what she told me.)

I voted 7 to 9, but it's a similar situation here. DS started reading them at about age 6, when they were first published. He was 14 when the last one came out in 2007.

DD is 3 years younger, and had to catch up reading the first few but I know she was at the local bookstore launch party for the 6th book in 2005, and she would have been 9 y.o. at the time. So she read the first 6 by age 9, and probably most of them at about 7 or 8, and the last one when she was 11 y.o.

[ollyoxenfree]

I just read through the whole thread. I'm glad it worked out for your DD, but I also think it's too bad that she was put in that position and had that worry.

[Autumn Breeze]

This is currently our family book.

We started reading them when my ds was 5. I read him the first 3, and we got half way through the 4th.

Now he's 8, and has read the first three on his own. I'm reading the 4th again, and the only person not paying attention to it is my 4 yr old. We're going to stop reading here because I know he won't be able to handle what happens in the 5th, 6th or 7th books. He's probably going to be closer to 11-12 when he, if he, finishes the series.


Since you don't remember the books, I highly recommend you go over to the Lexicon and look through the summaries at least because there are some big issues that my kids couldn't handle. (the deaths mostly)

[DaughterOfKali]

My son was 5. We would take turns reading it to each other.

[loraxc]

My DD is 6.5 and not at all ready. She has been known to cry over a series called Magic Kitten, for heaven's sake.

Also, I think this thread is getting a lot of parents of advanced readers who may be emotionally mature as well. Obviously, you need to go by your individual kid, but I think MOST kids are ready to start the series (emotionally and reading-level-wise) around 8. I would personally hold off on the later books (4 and up) till about 9-10 for most kids.

There are many wonderful, imaginative, and (if this is the need) high -reading-level books that are tamer and less dark than HP, and I personally think kids miss a lot when they read books that are emotionally over their heads (though they can always reread, and with HP I think people do).

[Autumn Breeze]

Originally Posted by loraxc

Also, I think this thread is getting a lot of parents of advanced readers who may be emotionally mature as well. Obviously, you need to go by your individual kid,

I wish I'd said this

My son is capable of reading the last 3 books in the series from a reading standpoint, but there is no way I am going to let him because I know the are too heavy for him.

Books 1, 2 and 3 are in the children's section at our library. Book 4 is in the youth section, and 5, 6 and 7 are all in the teen/young adult.

[goodygumdrops]

I have read these book numerous times and there is certainly dark violence in them. I have let my 3 1/2 watch the first one but I always skip over the end scary portion with Voldemort. I think I *might* be ok reading the first three to him, but skipping over the scary parts.

Personally, I cannot imagine letting a young child (under 9-10) view all of these films. I know this may not be a popular comment, but I believe that as parents we have to protect our child's mind/innocence and exposing them to violent concepts before they are old enough is a form of neglect and abuse.

[Evan&Anna's_Mom]

Originally Posted by goodygumdrops

Personally, I cannot imagine letting a young child (under 9-10) view all of these films. I know this may not be a popular comment, but I believe that as parents we have to protect our child's mind/innocence and exposing them to violent concepts before they are old enough is a form of neglect and abuse.

I think there is a world of difference between the books and the movies. When reading the books, a child can stop when things get a bit difficult (for whatever reason) and a child will visualize things in a way that may be less scary/intense than the movie director did. For the movies, the director controls pace and visuals and adds music to further control the emotional reaction. And there are a lot more "mellow" moments in the books that are never included in the films. So I would make the decision about reading the books completely different than seeing the films.

I also think there is a difference to reading aloud, where you are there to be aware of reactions or to answer questions, and child reading independently.

All, of course, also taking into account the child's personality.

[redpajama]

I just finished reading the first book to my 5.5-year-old, and we started the 2nd book. He has been asking to read the books/see the movies for a while, and so we decided we would read them together and then watch the movies (in that order). He LOVED the book (and the movie), and is eager each evening to listen to a chapter or two.

My 3.5-year-old is listening, too, but we read at bedtime, usually for an hour or so, and she typically doesn't last for more than 15 minutes. We watched the movie while she was napping, too. It's not so much that I find them inappropriate for a child her age (although I don't think she's quite ready for some of the content of the later books/films) as I don't want to "ruin" them for her by letting her watch them too early. We'll see if my resolve weakens with time, but my plan for the time being is not to show them to her yet.

[geekgolightly]

My son is 6 and we are reading the first book. He *likes* dark and scary things so I'll proceed in the series until it seems like it's inappropriate for him. I doubt it will be, though.

[ColwynsMommy]

I'm a big Harry Potter fan, so I was excited to share the books with my kids. We read the first book to my oldest last summer, so he was almost 6. We just finished up the second book a few days ago. I'm planning on doing one book a summer, so that by the time we get to the older stuff, he'll be ready.

I really don't like the idea of editing books. Because I like them so much, it just seems wrong to me to give my kid an edited version.. what's the point of reading HP if you make Voldemort not-so-scary? I'd much rather wait until my kid's old enough to get the full story.

I also think that they'll miss out on a lot of the meaning if I read it to them too early. I know that *I* reread them, but what if they OD on HP early, and never go back to it? They'd miss so much of it. Again.. I'm glad to wait until they grow into it.

My newly-turned-5 year old is sometimes present when we read, sometimes not. He has the gist of what happens in the first two books, but I think we'll probably reread the first book to him in another year or so, then progress through them at the same rate of one a year.