Twins not playing together anymore

[twinergy]

From age 2 to about 2.5 my twins used to free play together for 30min to an hour at a time every single day! They would giggle the entire time taking turns playing some incredibly silly game they had made up, and they had several silly games. Something like saying “Bleh!” while sticking out tongue, followed by “now you say bleh.” And they would go back and forth for a very long time.

But all this abruptly stopped about 2 months ago . DS mostly plays alone while DD clings to me, and if they do play together it usually ends up in a fight over some toy. Worst of all they aren’t playing their games anymore and I miss it. So I’m wondering if this is a two and a half year old thing? Or is it a teething thing? (DS is cutting his lower 2 year molars) Anyone else noticed something similar? How do twins play together when they get older (mine are 3 in October)? TIA

[crowcaw]

My twins are 5 in Sept and they play more and more together all the time. It didn't really start until they were past 3 and more like 3.5, so maybe you're ahead of the game; 3-4 they played some together but the fighting was constant and things usually derailed pretty quickly. 4-5 so far has been mostly good. They now will go off for and hour or two at a time setting up elaborate play spaces and having long discussions about who is playing what role, etc. They're just beginning to play board games together. Maybe the imitative "bleh" isn't that interesting anymore for yours and they're in a little dry spell until they come up with another way to use their sibling/toy? I don't think actual playing together typically starts so young but you don't have long to go.

[at-home]

My daughters are 3.5. They have gone through different stages - not as pronounced as what you are describing, but they do go through changes. It is likely due to developmental changes.....they are learning to do more things themselves and with this can come feelings of independence and also feelings of insecurity. Since one of your twins is a boy and one is a girl, their development may look different. As long as they seem "normal" in every other way (not withdrawn, not stopping their speech, etc.) then it is probably not something to be worried about. However, I can understand what a joy it has been for them to be playing so well together and it is possible that they will make their way around to doing that again. Perhaps helping your daughter to feel more secure would help the process?

[Ruthla]

I don't have twins, but my daughters are only 16.5m apart. They played together from the time DD2 was about 3mo (and could play peekaboo) until DD1 started puberty. Since then, their relationship has been really strained.

My guess is that this is some kind of developmental thing, and in another couple of months they'll start playing together again.

[twinergy]

Thank you for sharing your stories. It helps knowing others have been through the same thing. They are going through new developmental stages, asking for "privacy" is a big thing right now and they are just going to have to learn to respect each other's boundaries.