Well child visits?

[Stayseeliz]

My kids are almost 9, 6 and 3. I think the last time we went for well child visits was 4+ years ago. We take them if they need to be seen and that's it. But I would like to get them a thorough once over to check their vision, hearing, moles, birthmarks, etc. Especially since we homeschool and they don't get the vision tests at school. I scheduled appointments for all three of them but I'm a bit panicked about it. I've procrastinated so long in doing this. I trust this dr but I've never seen him for anything other than sick visits. I don't know his stance on vaccinations although looking at my childrens' "thin" files he's never said a word to me about them.

I've done my research but I DO NOT want to go in there and argue with him. I'll listen to what he has to say but it'd be pretty hard to change my mind at this point. How do I keep calm about this? Thoughts? Thanks!

[Marnica]

IF it comes up (which I doubt it will). This doc obviously knows you do not vaccinate your kids and I think he would have brought it up already if he wanted to be pushy about it.

If it comes up, just say no thanks and it's not up for discussion. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

No need to get into discussions about it.

[2boyzmama]

"Thank you, Mr Doctor, you've given me a lot to think about, I will read what you've given me and schedule a follow-up." Just stay fully non-committal, and don't argue. Accept what he tells you or gives you, and say that you will read it in-depth and bring your kids back. Then start packing the kids up and heading towards the door, continuing your "thank you"s on your way out if necessary.

[Emmeline II]

I know how that feels but he hasn't said anything yet, and it's obvious that your children are healthy despite not being vaccinated.

[MyTwoCherries]

First, good work! You're doing well as indicated by their thin folders! That's great!

Others gave you great advice but I just wanted to cheer you on also. I was always worried about our dr. and delaying and such but once we finally had a good discussion and I listened to him and he listened to me we haven't had any issues and it's been great! He asks me each visit what, if anything, we'll be getting and then we move on. Sometimes I think his nurses/assistants are bothered because we have to sign waiver forms to decline everything we're declining but it's been fine. And I actually feel better having researched and knowing so *if* anything comes up I have my information as well and we can discuss together and move on.

Good luck! Let us know how it goes, I'm thinking of you!

[chaoticzenmom]

Even as homeschoolers, the school will probably do a hearing/vision test if you want. Call the school and ask. The school nurse can do those pretty quickly.

Do you have access to a naturapathic dr?

If you're already anticipating trouble, I'd probably just find other resources for what you want looked at. Dr's offices are dirty places to take healthy kids.

[Stayseeliz]

Thanks for the advice. I'm really not anticipating any problems with the dr. I just need to be calm and assertive if he asks me what I think. I'm rereading some material and I'm going to be prepared if it comes up but I won't debate it.

Looking at it rationally he MUST have noticed my stance on this before. It's a large pediatic practice but we almost always see him and he's even called me to discuss a health issue with my youngest and he must've had her file right in front of him.

Thanks again! I feel better about it now!

[Stayseeliz]

We went for our well visits today and it went fine. He asked if we wanted shots today and I said that I was still on the fence and would decide later if we'll do any. Which is true. I'm still kinda sorta on the fence about a couple. I was ready to get defensive if need be but he said "Okay, I respect your decision but I need you to sign a waiver for liability purposes". I signed the waiver and it was no problem!

[mgg]

As a physician, I advocate for immunizations. But I advocate more for regular, well child visits. I hate the fact that some of my colleagues have made parents so uncomfortable that you skip routine health screenings.

The regularly scheduled well child visits are valuable to assess ongoing development, screen for familial and sporadic conditions, including hypertension, high cholesterol, scoliosis, proteinuria, hematuria and other kidney issues, as well as numerous endocrine issues including diabetes.

Yes, I advocate strongly for immunizations. But I see patients who don't immunize. I do however, insist that patients have regularly scheduled well child visits. Because I don't believe I can reasonably be asked to take a role in a child's care if I cannot get a regular overall baseline assessment of how he or she is doing.

Just go in, be polite, listen, smile, and simply decline. If they want you to sign a waiver, go ahead and do it. If there are parts you don't like, cross them out. Get the kids checked out and enjoy your piece of mind!

[Turquesa]

mgg, Thank you for not booting them out of your practice. Doctors who do this are doing these children no favors.

[phathui5]

We go once a year for checkups, just so I can say we did it. They offer vaccines, I say "no thank you," then we go home till next year.

[VillageMom6]

Mgg, I'm glad that you've joined Mothering.com and I hope that you stick around. You bring another viewpoint to many discussions and I enjoy that.

Here's my thing about well child visits... In the early years with my first several children I faithfully attended every scheduled visit. Our pediatricians were great... they listened well and were thorough in their exams.

However, I never left there having learned something that I didn't already know. I'd leave there having been told, "Your child is the picture of health." Yeah, I know. I could tell that because I live with my child every single day.

There have been many times over the years when something wasn't right with one of my children. Every time I'm the one who noticed that something was wrong and took the child in immediately.

Originally Posted by mgg

...I don't believe I can reasonably be asked to take a role in a child's care if I cannot get a regular overall baseline assessment of how he or she is doing.

My response is twofold:

1. You would get to know my child over the years when I bring him in for a sick check.

2. How would a well child exam nine months ago help you better to identify strep throat in my child? Or appendicitis? Or a broken wrist?

These are all ailments that have befallen my children recently. A doctor who is a complete stranger to us could have diagnosed those issues.

Thanks for your perspectives!