Water

[Aka mommy]

DD has been having an obsession with water over the past week. Normally i just don't worry about it, she's been playing with her play tea set and serving it and pretending to cook. She has spilled here and there but it's accidental and i figure she's learning how to manipulate things with the water in it. Plus she's using her imagination to make things, so i can't be upset.

But the last 2 days are making me have a really big issue with it. Yesterday it was the covered mattress with a spot about the size of her body (she is almost 5). She was making sand (imaginary) on the bed. I pulled out a hair dryer and did the best i could to dry it. And there was a few huge spots on the carpet soaked wet too.

Today it was all of our pillows. Soaked, completely. I have to get new pillows and we really can't afford it so i'm ticked off. And i have an almost 6 week old newborn so can't be constantly policing her. I have explained and she knows that water stays in her play things. But today was flat out wanting to get the pillows wet and when asked why, she had no explanation. She just wanted to feel the pillows wet.

Right now she is cleaning her room with her big sis, they tore it up with friends earlier and this is one of their responbilities before we go to the pool daily, so it's not a punishment. I'm at the end of my rope with this, especially as it could become a safety hazard (she had the pillows on the ground right next to the outlets and electronics that were hooked into it). How do i handle this since the post partum hormones are not wanting to deal with it gently in any manner and mommy is in a time out and searching for appropriate ways to deal with this behavior. Did i mention she is 5 in October and has a new little brother???

[coffeegirl]

Since she's not just keeping the water in the designated play things, maybe you can just set a no-water rule for the time being. New rule: she's not allowed to play with water because she keeps getting things wet/ruining things/etc., so even when playing with her tea set or whatever she either has to use "pretend" water or ask permission first before getting real water. That seems like a natural consequence, don't you think?

In any case, good luck mama! I know it can't be easy with a newborn on top of a busy and imaginative pre-schooler.

[Anastasiya]

I agree. The natural consequence of using something incorrectly and perhaps dangerously is no longer getting to use it.

I'd tell her she can try playing with water again when she's a bit older.

OR restrict all water play to outdoors - do you have a patio or deck?

OR restrict all water play to bubbles only. I will often let my kids do that because it's minimally messy while still having the fun wetness of water. I put a dribble of soap in my sink, turn the sprayer hose on full blast and then scoop off the foot tall bubble head that forms, put it in a basin, and they can do what they want with them.

[NiteNicole]

My 4.5 year old love love loves to play with water. Our rule is that she can play with water in one sink in the bathroom. She puts a towel on the floor first and wipes up when she's done. She has toys (mostly cups) for pouring. She can do this anytime she wants as long as the water stays right there and she remembers to pick up her towel and wipe down the sink when she's done. It has worked REALLY well.

[Aka mommy]

Thank you for the suggestions. Yesterday after they cleaned their room, i let dd know she was no longer allowed to play with water inside the house due to not being able to play with it safely. She was pretty upset, but i explained that safety is more important than fun when it could seriously hurt her. She has zero impulse control still at this age, so it's been something she still has yet to understand. And i realize i have to set up her surroundings so that she is safe and still able to explore, even at this age. It's a new one for me. My oldest dd has had impluse control since she was talking!

Tomorrow i'm going to go get some cheap water toys, some diving rings and some buckets and things she can use to pour it in and out and i will make sure to take that with us every day to the pool. I also am going to make a better effort at getting out to the pool DAILY. I notice that if she can play with water daily, she isn't so prone to do it at home behind my back. I think this should help her still be able to do something she loves, but in a safer setting and where she isn't getting into trouble for being inquisitive.

Thanks again!