doc just told me my 4 mo. son needs circ - Page 2

[Night_Nurse]

As others have said, there is nothing wrong with your son's penis, your doctor is uneducated and using ridiculous scare tactics, and you need to cancel the appointment with the urologist. Urologists in the US get paid for doing procedures and him telling you your ds is normal and doesn't need a circ will not net any profit for him (or her?). So of course the urologist will say to circ so he can get lots of $$$ for the surgery and a little bit more $ when you have to bring him back to the office for a follow-up appointment.
Seriously, in all my years of being a nurse, I've never seen a foreskin problem and as long as your son is urinating, he's fine. And if he ever does have a problem with his penis, please don't take him to the doctor you just saw. Check out "Finding Your Tribe" to see if others can recommend a foreskin-friendly dr. in your area.

[Ron_Low]

The doctor has given advice not in keeping with the AAP's policy. They've pubished care guidance: "Leave it alone. Clean what is seen."

Even if you knew nothing about foreskin, if you were told an otherwise healthy normal part of the body was "shrinking" you would say: "Really? So do you have two measurements separated by an interval that allows you to estimate the rate of change?"

You might also ask (knowing nothing, on the mistaken assumption that a shrunken opening was indeed a problem): "What are the measurements of the tightest opening that can be left intact without problems?"

The doctor would have no answers because the whole thing is unscientific superstitious hogwash.

I say go back to - or call back - that same doctor (with no intent to act on the silly recommendation). Keep asking rational questions until the doctor is forced to admit she doesn't know what she is talking about.

[smpayne]

I think I would be really tempted to report that doctor and the Urologist (as it appears they are working in tandem) to the medical board. It scares me to thing how many other mothers have they done this to?

I would definitely make a complaint to the insurance company about that doctor trying to push unnecessary procedures apparently for profit.

[Arduinna]

Yep, I'd cancel that appointment she made ( wow can't believe she actually made the appt for you) and send her for intact educational materials and then find a new Dr. You don't need a ped, unless there is some special medical issue with your son. A FP will do just fine.

[anechka]

Family Doctor is your best bet!!! Forget pediatricians. I go to the family doc and she is fine with us not vaccinating. She never pushes anything on us and does not use scare tactics. IMO, you should not even bother educating your ped about circs; it will serve no purpose. She will not listen to you no matter waht you say. I am from Europe and circs are almost NEVER done in my country and no one dies right and left from penile cancer.

[azgirl]

I'm not sure if this is true of all intact-friendly docs, but my ped doesn't really examine my son's penis. She peeks into his diaper from the top for less than a second and focuses most of her attention on the rest of him. I'm not sure she even gets a clear idea of how big that opening is. I'm wondering if maybe a doc who thinks circ is unnecessary is also less obsessed with baby penises in general? Is more comfortable with variations? I'm so sorry this happened to you, hope you find a great new doc! Maybe that's a good test for any new doctor...how concerned in general do they seem with the penis...maybe I'll be corrected on that one!

[ChasingGrace]

This is deplorable. I am wholeheartedly outraged. The opening in his penis is too small to pee through as a result of his foreskin? That’s absurd and I’d bet large sums of money that it’s a purely fabricated condition from the get go. All in all, I think most of the good mamas here have covered most of the directions my thoughts went in after reading your post. Except one…..

Physicians are under obligation to provide you with current, fact-based information that is supported by medical research in order to help you make your own decisions about health-based matters. This Pediatrician, having provided you with outdated and disproven information, having attempted to force her personal agenda on you and your son, and having attempted to manipulate you with fear, is grossly in violation of the professional medical ethics she has legally sworn to uphold. Thank goodness you are savvy enough to question her, because you must know that many parents are not. I shudder to think of how many baby boys have been and will continue to be forcibly sexually mutilated as a result of this one woman. Unless…..

You would be well within your right if you chose to take the time to educate her. www.IntactAmerica.org has all kinds of information that would help. If you do, you’re a great person and I commend your efforts. However, I think this woman needs to feel the full weight of how morally remiss her actions were. If she’s ever going to reconsider her position on this and what she tells parents, she is going to have to be moved by something and I suspect it won’t be enlightenment. I think her preferred prescription would serve best: fear.

If facing what you have faced with this doctor, you can be sure I would write a summary of the experience and send it to my state’s Board of Professional Regulation, to any hospital or practice she is affiliated with and to my health insurance company. And of course, I would copy it to her – just food for her thoughts, you know. Perhaps I sound a little vindictive here, but do all the baby boys who have been maimed at her urging not deserve vindication? In my experience, the stronger someone’s ignorance is, the less likely that kindly-presented information will change their thinking. Even when it does, a change in behavior often comes only after a very long time spent thinking in changed terms. I’d throw the book at this woman. She won’t suffer from it, other than the anxiety she might experience, which will not affect her genitals at all. And if she knows that the lies she is telling behind closed doors aren’t just being eaten up and obeyed anymore, that they’re being outed and reported to the appropriate governing bodies, she may stop.

It’s a personal decision, affected by a lot of factors. It takes guts and it’s stressful. I filed a complaint with my state against the (birth center) midwife who “cared” for me when my son was born. I couldn’t live with the thought of her neglecting another laboring woman as she did me, which is why I ultimately did it. Good for you for protecting your son from the harm this woman would see come to him. Good for you for sharing your story here for others to read. If you decide that taking action to prevent her from misguiding other parents is something you can do, here are some resources for your state:

Write to:
Department of Financial and Professional Regulation
Division of Professional Regulation
Complaint Intake Unit
100 West Randolph Street, Suite 9-300
Chicago, IL 60601
Phone: [phone]

Or file a complaint online:
https://www.idfpr.com/dpr/FILING/Complaint.asp

[skyblufig]

nak & haven't read whole thread, but for the OP, my goodness, RUN away from that doctor. And be sure and cancel that specialist appt so they don't a.) charge your insurance co, and b.) charge *you* for a missed appt! Where are you in IL? We're in Chicago and we see Fred Ettner in Evanston. I guarantee he will not harass you about circ'ing. Ridiculous and scary!

[nia82]

Wow that is pretty horrible. I would switch to a family doctor, since there are so little peds in your county. A family doc will be more laid back about many things!
When DS was a couple days old and had his check-up, I announced that DS is intact and his foreskin is to be left alone. The military ped tried to retract him anyways, but I batted his hand off of DS's genitals. He was like but I have to see the meatus to make sure he pees fine. I said he pees just fine, believe us, we got baptized a couple of times. He didn't try again. The new ped place at the new base didn't even open his diaper after I announced that his genitals are not to be touched...

[jenP]

Chasing Grace, you are spot-on! Awesome post.

OP, I second (or third or fourth!) the recommendation to switch to a family doctor. You mentioned there are only two peds who take your insurance in your area; you already tried the other one and this one has just shown you that you cannot trust her advice on anything (after all, if she is that uninformed on the normal penis, what else is she spouting nonsense about?) We see a family doctor who is from Europe. We only go to the doctor if there is a problem for which we need a diagnosis, or if we need a form signed for camp or school. He is totally cool. No pestering us about well-baby checks or vaccines and he has certainly never touched any of our family's genitals. At our first visit he asked me to move my son's penis out of the way so he could visually see that both testes were descended.
And, definitely cancel urologist appointment. Why would you see a specialist when your son is having no problem? Also, I have never known ANYONE to go to a urologist with an intact son and NOT be pressured (more like bullied!) to circumcise him. Also, it wouldn't hurt to call your insurance company and tell them that you canceled the appointment, so they don't try to bill your insurance anyway.

Good luck!
Jen

[Phoenix 69]

There is still much ignorance and even predjudice in the medical profession against the foreskin.

The opening in the foreskin needs be only large enough to let the urine flow freely and there can be exceptions to that. For example, during separation of the foreskin from the glans, it is quite common to experience ballooning. That is exactly what it sounds like . . . The foreskin balloons with urine briefly. This is a normal stage for some boys.

Cancer is definitely a scare tactic. The incidence of penile cancer is 1 case per 109,000 males or extremely rare. Circumcision for the prevention of penile cancer is more dangerous than the cancer itself. Penile cancer is only dangerous if ignored for years. It is a type of skin cancer, squamous cell carcinoma in situ and is plainly visible on the skin surface. The treatment is simple excision of the cancerous skin and prognosis for cure is excellent. Breast cancer in males is approximately 16 times more prevalent. Have you ever heard of a case of breast cancer in a man?

It is quite common for the preputial sphincter (the opening of the foreskin) to expand and shrink from time to time and from day to day. It can be either very loose allowing viewing of the urethral opening or very tight preventing any viewing

A urolgist is by definition, a surgeon and it is said "When all youi have is a hammer, everything starts looking like a nail." I can't tell you not to see the urologist or to see him. That's a decision you must make. You have to realize though that he may make you more comfortable or more confused and excited. Do a lot of research before the appointment to make sure you're getting the right information and can trust it.

.