Feeling anxious and guilty

[IndigoKoi]

I just researched a site for another mama, and in the process of reading the info, I am starting to feel very guilty an anxious. My ds is un-circumcised, and healthy at 21 mos. However, during his first year he did have a UTI, and of course in order to diagnose the dr in the ER (went there b/c he had a sudden high temperature and was breathing like he was in pain) ordered a in/out cath. I know catheterizing a screaming infant, with a slippery penis (from the cleaning solution) is not an easy thing to do, but I remember they retracted his foreskin. It was a bit traumatic, since they had me hold him down and I was also trying to soothe him as much as I could. But, now after reading all the information about how the foreskin should NEVER be retracted by anyone except the child himself, I am wondering if there is damage or adhesions to the foreskin/penis? I am starting to feel so guilty, that I allowed them to hurt him. I have never retracted it, and neither has my ped and I asked the nurses not to, and if they could get it in without doing so, and they said its practically impossible on an infant. I feel like I let them hurt him, and even though it's in the past and he seems healthy enough, I feel awful! And worried that there might possibly be some damage.

[tennisdude23]

You can cath. an infant without retracting the foreskin, and if there are problems they can use a bag. With that said, I would not feel anxious. The foreskin is very durable, and a one time retraction is unlikely to cause any long-lasting issues. Boys at that age and older start to pull and twist the foreskin and do all kinds of seemingly painful things, but end up totally fine.

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

Just one time wont cause problems down the road so you can relax about that. The problems come from repeat forced retraction leading to scar tissue. It sucks that your ds was hurt but nothing to do but just protect him from it happening again in the future.

[Fellow Traveler]

Don't worry much about it. First of all, it seems this occurred over a year ago. If you haven't noticed anything by now it's doubtful there will be any issue. Second, as someone who has one of these, I will repeat what tennisDude has said, the foreskin is very durable. Before you know it, your son will probably be doing things to it that will turn you white. Although it is correct to say nobody should be retracting it but the boy, I don't think it's the fragile body part such advice makes it sound like. So don't worry too much and just count it as a learning opportunity and be vigilant about this in the future as the real concern here is repeated retraction when the foreskin is not physiologically ready for that.