I am having a lot of anxiety about the new job I’ve signed on to do come this fall. I have signed on to teach kindergarten and first grade Hebrew and Religious studies and will need to be gone from the house for three hours every afternoon Monday through Friday. When I signed on for the job I figured I would be able to do it, but as the time gets closer for school to start and no firm plans for LO (22 months old) childcare situation, I am getting very anxious. I had initially decided he would join the daycare at the school I am teaching at. In order for him to be watched in the afternoon hours he needs to be enrolled in the morning hours too. The school has said they would accommodate me as an employee so I can be somewhat flexible. I thought a happy medium might be to have him in the morning program three times a week and have at least two mornings a week to sleep in and play together and then take him to work with me and leave him with the on-site sitters. The trouble with that is that his routine may be thrown off and maybe it’s just better he goes every day from 9-3 as per initial plan. This just seems like so much. I have been with him full-time until now and the thought of me not being him for that many hours a day seems unbearable.
I’m having cold-feet about the whole thing and I’ve already signed the contract. All these detracting thoughts like, “I don’t even like being in the classroom (I do so much better in one on one tutoring situations as opposed to the trenches that I call the classroom)” . Oh and to add something else to the story, I initially took this job with the plan to start taking my prerequisites for nursing so I can eventually become a midwife—a life long aspiration of mine. I thought if LO is in daycare in the mornings, I would be able to start by taking at least one course—for which I have enrolled at the local community college. In a dream world I could start by taking one course and leave LO at a 3 day a week morning program and call it a day. I just feel badly paying for the childcare and taking that money out of income so I thought if I have a job that covers that cost, I would be contributing.
Any thoughts, support, ideas? Help please. I am so nervous that I've been feeling nauseous and having trouble sleeping.
There are obviously many more complicating details (when in life are things just uncomplicated), like that my husband is unhappy at his current job, so my taking this one is an attempt to help out even though with the cost of the childcare it won’t actually be income contributing, though in the long run if I am able to get through school this way it will be an aid to him feeling comfortable looking for something else…..I need hugs, ideas and support. I am also not sure how crazy I am about the daycare center. I love being with my son. I find myself so flustered and nervous over all this that I fear I am becoming a snappy, impatient wife, like it’s somehow my husband’s fault I decided to take the job in the first place!
I know this is already pretty long winded as it is, but I feel that some more details might be relevant if anyone is to try to help with advice....I took this job in a way to prove that I can do something outside of working for my parents. My husband's current job is working for my parents and while he enjoys what he does, he doesn't enjoy working with my parents. By all accounts, they are really difficult people to work with, live with and all that. We really want to start working towards separating from them, moving from living close by for starters, my husband getting a different job or starting something on our own. Since I am interested in midwifery, we thought nursing might be a safer option to work towards and could be a mommy-friendly job if say I worked in a school and or camp setting. Either way I would enjoy the time studying and some time away from LO, I just think the teaching is not really what I want to be doing, not in the classroom, I just sort of jumped at it because the opportunity presented itself and now I am regretting it. Ugh.
I’m having cold-feet about the whole thing and I’ve already signed the contract. All these detracting thoughts like, “I don’t even like being in the classroom (I do so much better in one on one tutoring situations as opposed to the trenches that I call the classroom)” . Oh and to add something else to the story, I initially took this job with the plan to start taking my prerequisites for nursing so I can eventually become a midwife—a life long aspiration of mine. I thought if LO is in daycare in the mornings, I would be able to start by taking at least one course—for which I have enrolled at the local community college. In a dream world I could start by taking one course and leave LO at a 3 day a week morning program and call it a day. I just feel badly paying for the childcare and taking that money out of income so I thought if I have a job that covers that cost, I would be contributing.
Any thoughts, support, ideas? Help please. I am so nervous that I've been feeling nauseous and having trouble sleeping.
There are obviously many more complicating details (when in life are things just uncomplicated), like that my husband is unhappy at his current job, so my taking this one is an attempt to help out even though with the cost of the childcare it won’t actually be income contributing, though in the long run if I am able to get through school this way it will be an aid to him feeling comfortable looking for something else…..I need hugs, ideas and support. I am also not sure how crazy I am about the daycare center. I love being with my son. I find myself so flustered and nervous over all this that I fear I am becoming a snappy, impatient wife, like it’s somehow my husband’s fault I decided to take the job in the first place!
I know this is already pretty long winded as it is, but I feel that some more details might be relevant if anyone is to try to help with advice....I took this job in a way to prove that I can do something outside of working for my parents. My husband's current job is working for my parents and while he enjoys what he does, he doesn't enjoy working with my parents. By all accounts, they are really difficult people to work with, live with and all that. We really want to start working towards separating from them, moving from living close by for starters, my husband getting a different job or starting something on our own. Since I am interested in midwifery, we thought nursing might be a safer option to work towards and could be a mommy-friendly job if say I worked in a school and or camp setting. Either way I would enjoy the time studying and some time away from LO, I just think the teaching is not really what I want to be doing, not in the classroom, I just sort of jumped at it because the opportunity presented itself and now I am regretting it. Ugh.
