girl boy sleepovers

[meemee]

so how do you do this?

most of my dd's friends are boys.

and now that i am out of school, we have been having sleepovers continuously. siblings and all. and i am having fun and enjoying it.

but i wonder what happens when they grow up?

all teh sleepovers dd has been to has been all to girls houses. but her true close friends are boys.

one of the families have gone on vacation with dd and ex. but they absolutely wont encourage any sleepover ever. which is sad. because they have been the very best of friends since they were 6 months old. but i can understand the parents not wanting dd over for a sleepover. though there are other factors too. dd is a nightowl and bf is an early riser.

how do you guys handle this?

[Linda on the move]

We don't do co-ed sleepovers. It doesn't feel comfortable to me and we've never lived where it would have seemed *normal* in our community.

I know for other families in other areas they work just fine, but that just isn't us!

[zeldamomma]

My sister's best friend up till about age 6 was a boy, and he would sleepover sometimes. My parents made sure that they changed clothes in different rooms, but that was all.

Personally, I'm not a huge fan of sleepovers, co-ed or not. I'd prefer my kids hang with their friends during the day and sleep at night.

ZM

[philomom]

Originally Posted by Linda on the move

We don't do co-ed sleepovers. It doesn't feel comfortable to me and we've never lived where it would have seemed *normal* in our community.

I know for other families in other areas they work just fine, but that just isn't us!

I agree.

My compromise has been the "almost sleepover". The kids stay later than normal, eat cool treats and the parents come pick them up at 11:00. p.m......if the couple only has one kid.. it is like they get a date night.

[AllisonR]

Maybe it's cultural. My kids pre-k (age 3-6) they still swim together, nakked if they want, and in the spring they had a sleep over - co-ed, and it was great. I'd let my kids do co-ed sleep overs if they wanted, until either party felt it was uncomfortable.

When I was 8, I had sleep overs with my next door neighbor friend Mary. They moved and a boy Bo moved in, also 8, and we became friends and so I obviously wanted a sleep over with Bo as well. My mom said no, and when I asked her why, she just kept saying "No", and I kept saying "it wasn't fair, why not?" I never did find out.

[tbone_kneegrabber]

We haven't done any sleepovers yet, as ds is not yet 3, although we did go camping with someone other families, so that's kinda like a sleepover, although everyone's parents were there too.


Anyway I have no problem with co-ed sleepovers, and find it rather heterosexist to disallow because you are *assuming* all the kids concern are heterosexual and they may not be so the co-ed/single gender issue plays both ways (as was the experience of many folks I know)

I did co-ed sleepovers, mostly in high school. Younger than that i mostly had other girls sleepover and also I had older brothers so they would have a friend sleepover and so would I so in reality even "same sex" sleepovers were co-ed.



I would be more concerned with ds sleeping over a house where *I* wasn't friends with the parents, right now all of ds's really good friends I am also friends with the parents and if any of those kids were ready for a sleepover I would be fine with it.

[Oubliette8]

I think when I was a kid we mostly avoided them. But I had good male friends and remember a handful of sleepovers- mostly it was handled by either having us sleep in separate areas- ie girls upstairs, boys downstairs, or by having everyone sleep in a large common area that was NOT a bedroom, like the living room. They were generally well supervised, and if it was a large mixed group, like a youth outing chaperones slept in the same room. When boys and girls were seperated, everyone still got to stay up really late and do all the fun sleep over stuff, but at some point in the early morning, an adult directed us to our sleeping areas.