I know this is probably a huge overreaction, which is why I'm venting here instead of IRL, but I'm so sad....
Yesterday my mom gave my dd formula for the first time while babysitting her.
Admittedly I hadn't pumped enough, BUT there was some rice milk in there and I had told her to stretch the bm with a little rice milk to make a full bottle. DD hates the bottle anyway, so most of the time my milk just gets poured down the drain after the first ounce or so. I only work 3-4 days a week, I work 5 minutes from my house, and I wait tables, in the evenings/overnights only, so most of the time I'm not at work for more than 5 hours anyway. So I don't see there being a nutritional need for formula if we are only taling a few ounces a week. I just don't want to start down that path especially since I am struggling with depression and breastfeeeding means I HAVE to keep dd with me all the time and that is a good thing in my situation. It keeps me from running off and neglecting my family when I'm having a rough day.
There are lots of issues with my mom but she is the only sitter I have right now. I am 90% sure the whole thing was premeditated since she was only about a 2 minute drive from my house when she went and bought formula (amd she bought Earth's Best soy, which means she had to go LOOKING for it since most places don't carry that). She claims that she didn't have time to go home and get the bottle of pumped milk. But she had time to walk through a department store with a screaming baby, find the formula, find distilled water, find a bottle, pay for it all, and then mix it up in the car?
I know that one bottle is not the end of the world and that dd isn't destined for a lifetime of suffering or anything. In the big picture, I guess it's not that serious. But it's always been a point of pride for me that my kids had never had formula, solely due to my dogged efforts to give them only my milk even when it was extremely hard. So...it just bugs me, is all.
I'm halfway hoping dd has a really nasty poop or something so i'll have a legitimate reason to say "don't ever feed my child that again."
Yesterday my mom gave my dd formula for the first time while babysitting her.
Admittedly I hadn't pumped enough, BUT there was some rice milk in there and I had told her to stretch the bm with a little rice milk to make a full bottle. DD hates the bottle anyway, so most of the time my milk just gets poured down the drain after the first ounce or so. I only work 3-4 days a week, I work 5 minutes from my house, and I wait tables, in the evenings/overnights only, so most of the time I'm not at work for more than 5 hours anyway. So I don't see there being a nutritional need for formula if we are only taling a few ounces a week. I just don't want to start down that path especially since I am struggling with depression and breastfeeeding means I HAVE to keep dd with me all the time and that is a good thing in my situation. It keeps me from running off and neglecting my family when I'm having a rough day.
There are lots of issues with my mom but she is the only sitter I have right now. I am 90% sure the whole thing was premeditated since she was only about a 2 minute drive from my house when she went and bought formula (amd she bought Earth's Best soy, which means she had to go LOOKING for it since most places don't carry that). She claims that she didn't have time to go home and get the bottle of pumped milk. But she had time to walk through a department store with a screaming baby, find the formula, find distilled water, find a bottle, pay for it all, and then mix it up in the car?
I know that one bottle is not the end of the world and that dd isn't destined for a lifetime of suffering or anything. In the big picture, I guess it's not that serious. But it's always been a point of pride for me that my kids had never had formula, solely due to my dogged efforts to give them only my milk even when it was extremely hard. So...it just bugs me, is all.
I'm halfway hoping dd has a really nasty poop or something so i'll have a legitimate reason to say "don't ever feed my child that again."