How much potty training for a 13 month old?

[Ldavis24]

DD is very very mobile. Running these days and I have her little potty just hanging out in the living room. I'm not really actively trying to get her to use it all the time, right now she actually likes to just play with it a lot. But I do sit her on it usually once or twice a day and just talk to her while she is on it and say "go pee-pee" she thinks its hilarious for some reason.

She actually does pee in it after about 5-10 minutes almost every time. So I feel like this is awesome and about all I should be expecting. She is very physically mobile and she has great fine and gross motor skills but verbally she is not a real words kinda gal. She completely understands sentences, I ask her to go pick up a shoe she gets it, I say go say hi to the kitty she gives the cat a kiss but she does not use any real words except dada and the odd mama here and there. So should I be teaching her "potty" words or something?
This is my first and I have no idea how to start potty training other than keep it light and fun, i don't want to make it stressful in any way.
Where were your kids at with potty training around 13/14 months? Obviously EC doesn't apply here because we never did it. Although some days I wish I had even known about it when she was born to start that from the beginning!

[crunchy_mommy]

If she doesn't 'talk' could you teach her potty signs instead?

My 17mo just recently got over a fear of the potty (despite always being fascinated with it) so we're kind of just laying low with pottying... we try to give him 'naked time' once or twice a day & encourage him to sit on the potty but we're not forcing it & definitely trying to keep it stress-free. Problem for us is that he often tells us he needs to go & wants to use the potty but is still kind of scared of sitting on it for more than a minute or two (and we have multiple types of potties )... OK I'm rambling, my point was you could teach her some signs & just have fun with it!

[Beauchamp]

[tankgirl73]

Actually EC can totally apply here! It's just "late-start" EC. Do some googling and look at EC groups and forums etc for information on "late-start" EC. It is different than starting with a 3 week old or whatever, true, but a lot of the same principles apply.

In fact, I think most parents would be well-served by being aware of EC principles no matter what age you start potty-training, because it gives such insight and understanding into the elimination process and learning process from the point of view of the child.

By all means use potty words yourself, just don't expect her to say them back anytime soon. You never know, she might, or she might not. DD was 16mo before she was even saying anything at all, only had her language explosion just shy of 2 years old. (She's now 3.5yo and can talk your ear off and we're frequently being told how "articulate" and "well-spoken" she is). We did do sign language with her, though... she just started making her first signs around 13mo and by 18mo had like 70 signs in her spoken vocabulary...

And yes, potty was one of those signs!

Anyway, bringing EC principles into what you're doing now... I'd suggest starting to associate some kind of cue when she does pee, whether a "pssss" sound or the potty sign or the word 'pee' or any combination of those. Eventually (it may be a week or a year) she'll then be able to start making that cue herself to deliberately communicate to you when she needs to pee.

Also, for the time being, you'll be the one doing most of the "work". She's able to understand that she prefers to pee in the potty rather than in her clothes (diaper is clothes, it's just absorbent clothes), she's able to have a good amount of control over when she pees and when she doesn't. But she doesn't have COMPLETE control, and sometimes what she's doing is just too interesting to think about stopping it to go pee, and she probably doesn't yet have full comprehension of her body's signals, telling her when she has to go pee, when she could go pee, when she MUST go pee NOW or ELSE lol...

So your role for now is to help her learn to read her own body's signals. That can be as basic as just offering the potty a lot, like you're doing. You can also give her lots of naked time, where she might occasionally surprise you (and herself) with a piddle on the floor... that's part of the learning process, "Oh, that feeling I had a minute ago, maybe that means I have to pee?!" She can help clean it up but don't be punitive or shameful about it or anything, just very matter-of-fact.

And you can also try being very observant of her, to see if she gives any signals before she pees. Some kids wiggle a certain way, or make certain noises, or grab themselves. Other kids give no discernible signal at all (my DD was one of those... ) and you can instead go by timing... maybe you notice that she always pees about 1/2 hour after eating, or that she goes 3 times in the first hour after waking up (my DD was like that heh). Then you can be proactive and offer the potty when you have a good sense that she needs it, rather than just random times.

Random times will eventually work too, it's just more efficient if you can hit her pees with greater accuracy percentages.

The other thing to be aware of with EC, is not to fret about misses, or days when you just have to stick them in a diaper and get on with other things. It doesn't have to be all-or-nothing. Sometimes people think "I can't do it all the time, so that means I can't do EC at all... too bad, I think it would be interesting." But really, ANY potty-tunities are beneficial (both for baby and for saving on diapers!!) even if they don't end up fully potty-trained any earlier, you've still had fun communicating about it, building a bond of trust, and reduced the number of diapers needed along the way! And even full-time EC'd babies have strikes, pauses, and regressions, just like in any other developmental area. Just 'go with the flow' as they say lol...

In other words, it sounds like you're already instinctively on a good track, just do some reading on late-start EC for more ideas and you're all set to go.

[Ldavis24]

thanks for all the great info tankgirl. I always assumed from the little bit I have read about EC that it had to start basically from day one. Then I was thinking about DD and how I can always when she is going to poop because she stands completely still and her face gets all serious and then she is grunting for a minute. It cracks me up but if I can't catch a cue like that I should just retire.

If anyone has a favorite potty suggestion I would love to here it, we only have one right now and it is maybe a 1/2 inch too tall her for to sit on it and then get off easily. I am wondering if there are more comfortable ones too because I can tell that she isn't very comfortable in it. Her poor little butt has a red ring around it from the way she sits on it... Everyone should have a comfy bum on the toilet

[isabchi]

Yes, EC totally apply to a 13 mo. I started EC at 12 mo with my first and it wnt so well that I ECed my second from birth. We started EC with my daughter and she was so in tune that push us as paren0ts to go faster that we never so was possible. We do lot of naked time when DH was at work, but couple weeks later she was so unconfortable to pee in her pre fold with no covers that DH don't any other choice that offer to her the potty..We also use sign language to sign Potty and trainned ourselves (parents) to no stress out obut misses. Every misses is a new opportunity for them to learn how they body works and feel.

[tankgirl73]

Baby Bjorn Little Potty is the "gold standard" for EC lol... and even though it's little, DD can still use it at age 3.5. She rarely does anymore, but she CAN if she wants to. She has to squat now, but that's healthier for elimination anyway.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/lovecat...7594420812041/ <-- DD sitting on her BBLP at age 6mo, to give you an idea of the size.

[crunchy_mommy]

We have an Ikea potty that's very similar to the Baby Bjorn one (only cost $3 though!) and my very short DS can sit pretty comfortably on it. We also have a Safety 1st one (the Nature something or other recycled one) and that one is really awkward for him but he likes it sometimes anyway because it has a lid just like the "real" toilet.

[Jayray]

I thought "Potty Free Before 3" was really helpful and encouraging for "early" potty training.