cameliabrowne

[shelbean91]

I wanted to get out of the other thread to discuss the labels and what not.

I have asthma, so I, too, know about labeling. I didn't have a negative experience whatsoever because of that label. I have asthma, I'm asthmatic. I use(d) some traditional ways of treating it, some natural ways of treating it.

My kids, and most people I know who have kids on the spectrum, are not medicated unless there is another health issue.

As far as getting a diagnosis, of course, there is no self diagnosis on the internet. What I said was there is the screening tool that has the criteria the dr's use to assess so the parents sort of know what they're getting into. There are 4 categories and a child has to have so many symptoms from each of the categories. Now, some symptoms may be present in a 'typical' child, but it's the intensity and/or duration of the symptoms that would lead to a diagnosis. Because asd is disorder, it's a collection of symptoms, not a specific thing that can be tested for, it's how the symptoms cause the child to interact with the world.

Whether or not you want a diagnosis or label is a personal thing. I could care less what someone else wants to do, however, not seeking a label doesn't mean a child doesn't have autism, it simply means they are not labeled.

[BookGoddess]

I'm going to write something I wrote earlier...

Your child is still your child with or without the diagnosis. However, a diagnosis or label if you prefer can be important to getting services. We couldn't have asked for the services we wanted without a diagnosis. A diagnosis brings its share of sadness and worries because it's confirmation of what you already know deep down but it also offers relief as well. The diagnosis helped me because others now knew it wasn't bad parenting that was causing the issues. An evaluation is a good thing though it's never easy to hear that there are issues with our children's development. None of us are ready for it even though most of us aren't surprised by when we get the diagnosis from a professional. We've seen the signs long before the official diagnosis is given.

Getting the diagnosis helped us to get my child the services that she needed. She's done so well since we got her services. I have no regrets about it. A diagnosis opened up doors to services that suit her learning style and her learning differences. It allowed her to go from simply surviving to thriving. Getting the diagnosis was good because it prevented others from misunderstanding her. She looks neurotypical and she acts NT for the most part but there are instances when she is clearly different and she reacts more intensely. Having a diagnosis helped others see that she wasn't being bratty, uncooperative, odd, or difficult on purpose.

I think sometimes parents and family are resistant to getting a diagnosis for a child especially if it's something neurological because they see it as a reflection upon themselves and/or their parenting. Not getting the diagnosis doesn't mean there's not a problem. The problematic condition hasn't gone away just because a professional hasn't put a name on it. It's still there in the child. You can't pretend or will away or wish away something like that.

Getting a diagnosis also doesn't mean you fail to accept your child or that you've failed some way as a parent. You still have a say in what treatments your child receives. You haven't abdicated any parental rights or responsibilities. If you have an accurate diagnosis you're actually less likely to get inappropriate suggestions for services because you'll know exactly what the issues are with your child.
I'm nearsighted. I wear glasses. Without my glasses (or contacts), I really can't function. I'm at the point where even the big "E" on the eye chart is blurry. In much the same way, the services my child receives are her "eyeglasses". These services allow her to function better. Why wouldn't I want her to have those services if she can benefit from them?

[cameliabrowne]

hi guys. Given that you have used my name as the thread subject, Shellbean, i think it fair to say you are planning more of lynch mobbing, than a continued discussion. I wrote many paragraphs in my posts saying that I was not addressing them to parents who were tired and stressed from raising autistic children, and much of what I wrote that was relevant was ignored in favour of a few hooks that were reacted too. Nevermind, that is human nature. All the best with your beautiful children. But I'm off for greener pastures.

[shelbean91]

No, absolutely not - no lynch mobbing here. I'm not on the least bit offensive or defensive, I only put your name because I wanted you to see it - it doesn't seem as though you're posting too frequently and I didn't want you to miss it. I'd be happy to change the title if you'd like to continue the discussion- let me know. I'm genuinely interested in discussing the differing opinions on the issue.

If you don't want to continue, that's fine, too. If you'd like to continue the discussion, please let me know what I should title the thread. If not, I'll leave it as is and let it go.