Is Co-sleeping the problem?

[GreenbankMom]

Our 4 mo old was sleeping better for about a month, even during a vacation where he co-slept with us in three different beds. He is not a natural sleeper and always takes enormous effort to get down, but he had settled into a nice little pattern of 4-4 1/2 hrs and then 3-3 1/2, which was awesome for me and for him.
Now he is sleeping less and less. He hasn't slept more than 2 hrs in a row in over 2 weeks. He wakes up crying every 1.75 hours, not in pain, just fussy. He didn't used to wake up crying.
I am getting frustrated because I can't find a cause for the crying (we solved the night diapering issues) and he's really hard to soothe. I have to bf him sometimes for hours. Last night I had to sleep with my nipple in his mouth for 3 hours, if I took it out he woke and cried. If I shifted my position, he cried. He doesn't want to eat during the day anymore, just all night long. I am starting to lose it, because I never get more than an hour of sleep, plus I got that taste of what a month with good sleep was like. This has been going on too long now to be a growth spurt. I am at a loss.
Am I setting myself up for problems down the road by soothing him all night with BF?
Is co-sleeping making it too easy for him to smell me and want to nurse all night long? Am I distracting him from sleeping?

[svs79]

I don't think co-sleeping is the problem. My DD was the same way at that age (bfing all night), but she is doing pretty good now at 20 months. Could be other big changes going on or perhaps teething? It can be really hard to tell when they are first teething. Have you tried any teething gel for him?

[Carhootel]

IMO it sounds like the 4 month sleep regression - google that. Also, I don't think co-sleeping is the problem, I mean, what would you do if he was in another room and was up? you'd be OUT of bed trying to soothe him/nurse him...

I suggest reading the no cry sleep solution because 4 months is about the age that it REALLY helped us establish a routine that helped all of our sleep and helped me have realistic expectations

[ErinYay]

Originally Posted by Carhootel

IMO it sounds like the 4 month sleep regression - google that. Also, I don't think co-sleeping is the problem, I mean, what would you do if he was in another room and was up? you'd be OUT of bed trying to soothe him/nurse him...

I suggest reading the no cry sleep solution because 4 months is about the age that it REALLY helped us establish a routine that helped all of our sleep and helped me have realistic expectations

YES! Our previously great sleeper went all to heck at about 4 months. She went back to sleeping pretty well after about 2-3 weeks, so don't get TOO hung up on mommas who report that the 4 month regression lasts until college!

[GreenbankMom]

Originally Posted by svs79

I don't think co-sleeping is the problem. My DD was the same way at that age (bfing all night), but she is doing pretty good now at 20 months. Could be other big changes going on or perhaps teething? It can be really hard to tell when they are first teething. Have you tried any teething gel for him?

I wondered about teething, but how do I know? He is drooling and sticking his fists in his mouth constantly, but he's been doing that for awhile. Babies drool and suck, right? that's normal. I can see his top teeth clear as day waiting to come in, but nothing on the bottom. He's had those top teeth poised and ready since mo 2 and they haven't moved an inch.
I tried frozen washcloths etc, but he hated it. He really likes skin, that's it. No pacifiers, no teethers. Fingers and knuckles only. I read that I shouldn't try teething gel b/c it can numb the back of his throat and make it hard for his gag reflex. He chokes a lot as it is on all his drool, so I didn't want to numb his mouth.

[GreenbankMom]

Originally Posted by Carhootel

IMO it sounds like the 4 month sleep regression - google that. Also, I don't think co-sleeping is the problem, I mean, what would you do if he was in another room and was up? you'd be OUT of bed trying to soothe him/nurse him...

I suggest reading the no cry sleep solution because 4 months is about the age that it REALLY helped us establish a routine that helped all of our sleep and helped me have realistic expectations

4 month sleep regression!!! Thanks!

Is bfing constantly going to set me up for further head aches down the road?

I don't want to teach him to only be soothed by me. I work on-call and down the road I will have to be at the hospital in the middle of the night. I want to make sure that Daddy has a fighting chance to sooth him, in case I am not there.

[ssh]

Originally Posted by GreenbankMom

Is bfing constantly going to set me up for further head aches down the road?

The constant breastfeeding is followed by a growth spurt. Your milk supply will have increased to meet his need for more milk because he's bigger. The regressions are caused by growth spurts and developmental changes. When the growth spurt of over, when the teeth are in, when he's crawling, etc., his sleep and nursing will settle back down.

[ErinYay]

Originally Posted by GreenbankMom

4 month sleep regression!!! Thanks!

Is bfing constantly going to set me up for further head aches down the road?

I don't want to teach him to only be soothed by me. I work on-call and down the road I will have to be at the hospital in the middle of the night. I want to make sure that Daddy has a fighting chance to sooth him, in case I am not there.

I'd start trying to get him to take a bottle of expressed breastmilk in that case. If he won't take one from you, or when you're around, try going for a little walk- often removing our boobs helps little ones take a bottle. (Mine would take a bottle from me with no issues, but did always want the boob afterward. She hasn't taken a bottle since about 3 months, though.)

[svs79]

Originally Posted by GreenbankMom

I wondered about teething, but how do I know? He is drooling and sticking his fists in his mouth constantly, but he's been doing that for awhile. Babies drool and suck, right? that's normal. I can see his top teeth clear as day waiting to come in, but nothing on the bottom. He's had those top teeth poised and ready since mo 2 and they haven't moved an inch.
I tried frozen washcloths etc, but he hated it. He really likes skin, that's it. No pacifiers, no teethers. Fingers and knuckles only. I read that I shouldn't try teething gel b/c it can numb the back of his throat and make it hard for his gag reflex. He chokes a lot as it is on all his drool, so I didn't want to numb his mouth.

I know it is really hard to tell with teething. It seemed like my DD's teeth took forever to come in! I never heard anything like that about teething gel, but I guess it is possible. Maybe just use a very small amount right on the the top two teeth? We used Hyland's a little for my DD when she was inconsolable. She was the same way - never wanted a paci or teether - only her mommy or her own fingers. Good luck, I hope it gets better soon!

[Anna GS]

The homeopathic teething gels don't numb the mouth at all.
Good luck!

[rightkindofme]

We nursed all.night.long for what felt like forever. I can't remember how long it actually was in my pregnancy-insomnia brain. It was rough. But that phase too shall pass and I was too nervous about compromising my milk supply to be willing to cut her off at all when she was small.