How do I get DS to take longer naps?

[mrs.t]

My 3 mo DS really, really needs to nap more. He gets cranky at the same times every day, so I desperately try to put him down for a nap. He will nurse to sleep sometimes, which I don't mind, or if I put him in his bouncy seat he might doze off. However, the nap will typically last 20 minutes or so, and then he startles himself awake. I also can't lay him down flat in his bassinet or co-sleeper because he wakes up almost immediately. At night we swaddle and it works great, but I'm afraid to overdo it by using it for nap times as well, so I really would like to avoid it.

He will literally sit there with glassy eyes, yelling out with complaint noises, but will not fall asleep even though he's exhausted. Then when he finally does sleep it's definitely not enough time because he wakes up cranky. Any advice? How long is a good nap supposed to last?

[hakeber]

I don't think you can over do the swaddle. DS was swaddled for every nap (outside of sling naps and car seat naps en route) until he was about 8 or 9 months old. He slept nice 1.5 hour - 2.5 hour naps and woke up happy as a clam.

I just swaddled my dd for a nap in the first time in a few months but after three days of no naps longer than 20 minutes...well she's just waking up now and she is laughing, so there you go.

I vote for a swaddle. If it help him sleep at night it can't hurt to try.

[Tway]

DD has only ever really slept 40 or so minutes at a time (although around 8 months she'd do an occasional hour). Until she was about 5 months, she slept 3 X 40-minute naps, no matter how hard I tried to extend them.

However, the sure-fire way to get her to nap is to lay her on the bed and nurse to sleep. That way there's no transferring to a crib and no accidentally waking her up. Sometimes napping with her will even extend her nap a little. I've also learned to spoon her and let her hold my finger if she's really fighting sleep.

I don't think there's a "right" amount of time to nap, as long as your LO looks rested. Maybe you can just try putting him down more often if he's still tired.

Good luck!

[toughcookie]

so are you saying he won't nap on any flat surface, just on you or in a contraption? if so, i groan along with you. i had that, at his age. he was so desperate for daytime sleep that at times he looked like a strung-out old man. the only way i could get him down was to breastfeed him TO SLEEP, i mean to limp-arm stage, then put him in his bassinet molecule by molecule so he would stay sleeping (mostly didn't work). i spent a LOT of time comfort/sleep-feeding him!

out of desperation for his well-being i started lying down with him in my bed for naps. my body next to his, and the pacifier, and his blankie, made it possible for him to eventually fall asleep. then i'd sneak up, pillow-surround him, and creep away. that was at maybe 3.5 months when i started that. now, he will be put down in his crib to nap, but only if the situation is precisely perfect (which rarely happens). usually i lay down with him still. it's gotten to the point that when i bring him into my room, plop him in the middle of our bed, and pick up the paci, he'll open his mouth, accept the paci, then start rolling his head back and forth with that sleepy, oh-it's-my-bed look on his face. it is my goal to get him to nap in his crib WELL this month, since he's mobile now and he fell off the bed (landed on his bum, thank goodness). but this transitioning at least got him to have 3 regular naps a day (9 am, 1 pm, 3.30 pm), and he is no longer an exhausted child.

when he does wake up from a ridiculously short nap, or just is cranky right away, i lie next time him, put the paci back in (he wakes when he pitooees it), and he usually falls back to sleep for another hour, waking up happy. that one took me a while to learn!

he DOES sleep in his crib at night, by the way. so he tolerates it when the cues are there (bathtime, reading stories). naptimes are just harder, since there aren't good cues i guess, and also, it's so bright in here in the day.

i hope any of this helps, even if it's just empathy!

[mrs.t]

Thanks, empathy helps!

Yeah, he only naps in some kind of seat or on me, attached to my boob, or pressed up against my body in my bed, and if I move him or try to move away from him, he's up. He hates the swing lately, and the only way he falls asleep by himself is in the bouncy seat or in his car seat when we are out.

Thank god swaddling works at night!

So maybe I should swaddle him for naps? I'm so afraid of losing the only thing that works for night time.

Did any of you notice that naps in a dark, quiet room helped? I currently have him in the living room, which is not loud at all but it's kind of bright.

[LyndsayMW]

If you don't have an exercise/birth/yoga/giant ball to bounce him on, I urge you to go out immediately and get one. Once we discovered that DS would fall asleep if we bounced him on the ball, our lives were transformed. I don't know what it is about that thing, but it works (so far!). If he wakes up after 25 minutes, we rush him back to the ball to bounce, and sometimes we can get him to sleep longer - this has worked since DS was about 2 months old (he is nearly 6 months now).

Suddenly, I worried about what we would do if the ball stopped being awesome!

[carmen358]

Originally Posted by mrs.t

Did any of you notice that naps in a dark, quiet room helped? I currently have him in the living room, which is not loud at all but it's kind of bright.

This makes a big difference with DD (almost 7 months). She used to sleep in the living room but is so active now that she just doesn't settle down. Even with sleeping on me it just seems too bright and stimulating for her.

[Peony]

My girls would pass out anywhere as long as they were on me. DS wanted a dark, quiet room from very early on. Naps are usually short ones here as well, I don't seem to produce children that take those miracle 3 hour naps you always hear about.

[toughcookie]

we recently moved from a rental home with no window treatments and pouring in sunlight to our forever-home with a nursery for the babe complete with a black-out blind on the window. daytime sleep has improved dramatically. may be coincidence or some other factor, but i do think it's the light....

[NEastMomma]

I feel your pain!

First, I don't think you can over-use the swaddle. Go right ahead and swaddle for naps if that is what helps baby to sleep - it is okay to do that.

When my DS was that age he'd only nap for 10 minutes and only in his little seat.

I did a variation on NCSS and would nurse him down, put in seat and wait. I knew that he'd wake in 10 min, so I'd sit there very quietly, out of his sight (with a newspaper or coffee, etc) and the moment I heard/saw him stir I'd shush and rock him. It took 2 weeks, but eventually I got him to 20 min naps, then 30. He eventually went to 40 min naps on his own.

He is now almost 1 and consistently sleeps for only 45 min naps (2xday). This stinks for me b/c I feel like I don't get much accomplished around the house or get much of a break, but he's the happiest baby ever, so he just clearly doesn't need more sleep.

Hang in there! You're doing a GREAT job Mama!!!

[busymama77]

My DS used to be a full time swaddled baby until he started rolling over a month ago and we've let go of the swaddle unless he REALLY needs it for a nap or just to calm down from the day.

So, yes, I vote for swaddle, too. It was a lifesaver for us in the beginning!!

[P.J.]

My DS also takes very short naps, if he naps at all. There are days (today being one of them) that he just doesn't sleep and will get maybe two 20min naps. Ugh! In fact we just tried to sleep (I stayed the whole time on the bed with him as he wasn't settling down) and it didn't happen.
We swaddle him for nearly every nap (unless he falls asleep on me or his dad) and at night. I don't think you can over-use the swaddle. When DS isn't sleepy, and after he wakes up, he usually wiggles his way out of the swaddle is all. It still works the other times if he's sleepy.
If I hear him waking up, I don't go in to him right away (he always makes a lot of grunting noises and doesn't just start crying). Sometimes he falls back asleep, but sometimes not.
I would only suggest you swaddle him for naps too, but I feel you, we have the same thing here and I hope to get some useful suggestions as well. Good luck!

[P.J.]

Originally Posted by busymama77

My DS used to be a full time swaddled baby until he started rolling over a month ago and we've let go of the swaddle unless he REALLY needs it for a nap or just to calm down from the day.

So, yes, I vote for swaddle, too. It was a lifesaver for us in the beginning!!

I just noticed this. Our DS started rolling from back to belly last week, and we still swaddle him. We use these weird baby-bumper thingys. I don't know what they're officially called, as they were given to me second-hand. But they're little firm cushions that go on either side of him and make a cozy nest, and stop him from rolling. So we still put him down for naps in our bed, alone, only surrounded by those bumpers and he stays put. In fact, I think they add to the swaddle effect as they are snug up against him. My only complaint is it makes it a bit awkward to lie next to him and nurse him down. Obviously, we don't use them overnight when we're there with him.

[busymama77]

Originally Posted by P.J.

I just noticed this. Our DS started rolling from back to belly last week, and we still swaddle him. We use these weird baby-bumper thingys. I don't know what they're officially called, as they were given to me second-hand. But they're little firm cushions that go on either side of him and make a cozy nest, and stop him from rolling. So we still put him down for naps in our bed, alone, only surrounded by those bumpers and he stays put. In fact, I think they add to the swaddle effect as they are snug up against him. My only complaint is it makes it a bit awkward to lie next to him and nurse him down. Obviously, we don't use them overnight when we're there with him.

I just made us nervous to continue with the swaddle during nighttime. He sleeps just fine without it, but it is good to know about the firm cushions in case something changes. Thanks!

[Quinalla]

Definitely try a dark, quiet room for naps. I know a lot of books encourage naps in a brighter, louder place to distinguish night from day, but once they get the difference, it generally works fine to make naps quieter. I know we had to in a darker, quiet but with low white noise because she hears something or sees something and has to investigate. She's just so curious, which is good, but not good when she needs sleep

As for putting them down, I really struggled with this too. At night, it wasn't so bad, but for naps, yeah, it was nearly impossible to put her down at first, she would wake up. So for me, I made a rule of I would try to put her down 2 times and if it didn't work, just gave up and let her nap on my lap. That way I felt I was still working on it, but I also wasn't making myself crazy either. Also, if she was really tired, I would just not even try to put her down and try to get her to get some good sleep for at least one nap, then go back to trying to put her down later.

[october]

My daughter sleeps effortlessly for 1-3 hours in the cradle swing. Between sleep cycles the motion trances her out so much that she just falls back asleep. I actually have to be conscious of how long I leave her in there, or sometimes she'll just keep going!

[Pookietooth]

You can swaddle for naps too. Sounds like he needs it if he's starting himself awake. Also, white noise and a darkened room help with dd. I have an air purifier and a fan running in the bedroom where she sleeps. You can buy room darkening curtains at Target or make your own from heavy dark fabric.

[mrs.t]

Thanks everyone! I tried swaddling for his afternoon nap, and he slept for an hour! He's soooo much less crabby. I don't know what I'm going to do when he outgrows the "swaddle me"!