UGH!!! So confused about when or if we're trying ever..vent

[SomedayMaybe3]

Tonight I decided to have one last heart to heart with hubby because we were discussing his current job situation. I told him that i've decided that when our oldest is 6 (3 years from now) that i would love to consider having more children. I asked if he would too....he says, "now?"...did he not just hear me? So i sad, "no not now..What i know is that right now i feel like i will want another when oldest is 6..but that could change between now and then..So he actually agreed and said yes, he would def. consider it. But he also said that right now he would not want another in three years but that could change...he has a hard time looking past the present if that makes sense. I'm excited but nervous. What the heck do i do with that info? Ideally i want to finish my bachelors then if we decide to have another baby we can do so knowing that i can stay at home or work if need be. i hope i don't change my mind and not want more..haha...i think he'll want another if we have a good handle on our bills and he has the job he is wishing for...we also want a bigger house with more property...and finally a real wedding ceremony to replace our court wedding:/

sorry this is so random...but i needed to vent to someone..i think my best friend is probably sick of hearing about it i'm sure i'll be able to keep busy with all the goals we have...now i just wish there was a way to predict how he'll feel about more in three years

anyway thanks for reading

Sarah

[StephandOwen]

For awhile my dp was in the "I don't even want to discuss it because it's not even an option for a long time" camp. He wouldn't say no, but he wouldn't say yes. It totally confused me. He recently told me that the reason he did that was because he knew I wanted another baby but he didn't want to tell me yes because he didn't want me to get excited about it if something happened and we couldn't try for another one (at that time his job situation was unstable, ds's future wasn't clear (as far as his therapy needs), etc). For him, he was looking out for me because he didn't want to hurt me if it turned out we couldn't have another baby (because of other issues, not because he didn't want another one). Now our situation is better (he's in a stable job, ds's therapy needs aren't as great, I'm in school, etc) and he's been talking more about *when* we can start trying, not *if* we can ever try. He's even let me bring some baby stuff in the house and store it in a tote and only slightly rolled his eyes. LOL!

[SomedayMaybe3]

awww ur reply makes me so happy...i kinda feel like that's how dh is..i told him that if i start talking about babies that he needs to know that i mean in atleast three years so not to roll his eyes...he just smiled and said that, that was the best part..i think men just have the instinct to be so protective. i just wish they would be more vocal lol