why do people just assume you will schedule?

[marquess78]

i was talking with my manager today about babies and she says, "have you had c/s in the past?"

i say "yes, sadly 3 of them"

she says, " well at least then you already know when they are coming since you'll schedule a c/s again"

i say, "ugh, no we wont be scheduling a c/s because there is no medical reason for me to have one"

she says, "really, they let you do that?"

i say, "pray tell, how are they going to force me to have an unneccessary c/s, hold a gun to my head?"

she says, "guess not. i just didnt know you could decide to have a vaginal birth after youve had c/s"

really? do people really just not know its possible? she had an awful vaginal delivery at the same hospital i will be at, so i guess the idea of a scheduled, controlled delivery may be appealing to her. i guess i was just suprised to find she really didnt know.

but she isnt the only one. alot of people just assume i will willingly schedule the c/s for convenience. its hard not to be snarky and say, "why yes its convenient to take care of newborns while recovering from major abdominal surgery. all the while hoping you dont get a raging infection from the giant hole in your belly"

anyone just get really irritated about the assumption?

[mollikins]

I do find that a LOT of people, women or otherwise, don't realize that VBAC is an acceptable, safe, and usually preferable alternative to an automatic repeat section.

When I run into it, I usually try to use it as a 'teachable moment' and educate whomever it is about why I chose VBAC and why it's a good idea to research your options before making a decision. I generally let them know that VBAC is almost always safer for mom and baby unless there are some unusual risk factors involved, and point them towards a couple of websites where they can check things out if they're interested.

It is really odd though. I'm not sure where the misinformation comes from. I live in an area where all of the local hospitals allow VBAC, so it's not like it's banned - then it might make more sense for people to question it.

[kltroy]

Yes, many (most?) women at least here in the United States, do not know that VBAC is an option, and especially that VBAMC is an option. Don't be annoyed or defensive - simply use it as an opportunity to educate your peers. If more women knew they had a choice, more women would ask for it, eh? Honestly, even as a VBACtivist in my community, I am still slightly surprised (but gratified!) to randomly encounter other women who have had VBACs. Sad, but true - it's just not that common. I believe the national VBAC rate is only about 9%, and probably only about 15% of women even *try* to have one. This leaves 85% that simply schedule a RCS. Can you really blame another women for assuming it's the norm, given these numbers?

[Ammaarah]

Very few women VBAC these days, especially after multiple c-sections. I think most people would think like your manager.

[Storm Bride]

The "experts" say "once a c-section, always a c-section", and people just accept that. Then, of course, you get the horror stories (like mine, sadly), and people run with those and think/say "if she'd only scheduled, everything would have been fine" (even though they don't actually know that). It only takes one confirmation of accepted wisdom to sink the idea into people's heads...but it takes lots of positive stories to make the alternatives seem acceptable.

[nova22]

Yep, I think it is common "knowledge" that one c-section will always lead to another.

I was recently sharing how excited I was that my MW, who had attended over 500 midwife-assisted homebirths when I first met her in 2006, has never, ever, ever had to transfer a VBAC patient because of uterine rupture. She said that almost every time they do a hospital transfer, it is because of true failure to progress or the mother's desire to have an epidural. Anyway, after I shared this, one woman came right out and said that she firmly believes in "once a c-section, always a c-section" despite any and all evidence to the contrary. I think a lot of it is fear because they really think it is the safer option.

Not like you asked for it, but my advice? ...don't lay your pearls before swine. Some people will not change their minds no matter what, might as well save your breath with those ones. If someone is truly interested in learning, that's one thing, but I don't bother trying to convert people to believe that VBACs are safer than repeat c/s.

[cappuccinosmom]

I don't know that there's any call to be irritated with *her*. At the system and the systematic misinformation, sure. But not at individuals who are taught from childhood on to accept medical "authority" and who probably don't know a single person (besides you, now) for whom VBAC is even a consideration.

A mellow, factual response would be a great way to take part in the re-education of our society on the subject.

[Fay]

It seems like MOST people are unaware of the possibility of a VBAC. My mom and MIL had no idea that it was a possibility for me until I explained why. This is one reason why I walk around wearing my "VENI VIDI VBAC" t-shirt.

[marquess78]

i didnt get mad or anything really. just irritated in my head cuz its such an 'obvious' to me.

basically i am thinking, 'why would anyone willingly schedul major surgery on purpose'?

i educated her on the facts during that conversation. but it doesnt really apply to her. i hope she will pass it on

[buckeyedoc]

It's just like the people who assume that any pregnant woman who reaches full term will schedule a labor induction. There is a mistrust of mother nature when it comes to childbirth.

My parents are nervous about my VBAC, but they have not researched it like I have. It would be crazy for me to schedule a RCS just because my second son was a breech Cesarean more than 3.5 years ago. Crazy, I tell you!

You have done the research and will go with your gut about what is the best plan of action. Others will just have to "deal with it".