Daily rhythm / nap dropped for 3 year old

[beepsandclicks]

Hi all,

I was wondering if anyone with a nice daily rhythm might be able to share their schedule with me. I have been neglecting a tried-and-true, solid rhythm for our 3 year old son, and I see that it may be taking it's toll. I'm also wondering if others are finding their children dropped naps at age 3. It seems our son just has, and I'm having a heck of a time getting used to this new rhythm and what it should look like.

Unfortunately, I've always struggled with rhythm myself, so I admit I've not been the best at keeping rhythm in our home. I see now that there is no getting around it, I have to improve! I'm just now implementing the 7 o'clock bedtime, but I have a question or two...

If your child won't nap but seems to droop/try to fall asleep at about 4 o'clock, do you let him, or do you encourage him to stay up so as not to interfere with a 7 o'clock bedtime (uninterrupted sleep)? It seems a bit harsh to keep him up, but if he naps when he naturally starts drooping, he will wake at 5 o'clock and will not be able to get to sleep until past 9-10pm! Ack!

Compounding this problem is the fact that we still co-sleep. None of us are really in a rush to end this arrangement, but I can see he does need to practice being able to get to sleep by himself. In the past I've laid down with him every night until he fell asleep, which is fine on the quick-and-easy nights, but mighty frustrating on those other nights.

We plan on homeschooling our son using Waldorf philosophy, so I need to really become comfortable with daily rhythms soon. I'm ashamed I have not done so already, since I've known the importance of this! Any advice would be much appreciated.

Thanks,
Debra
Houston

[noahs_wings]

dd just turned 3 and is doing the same thing. Also here tryign to get back into a rhythm, i've let it go because its summer and i thought summer should be more randomish but it feels really nice to be back in a rhythm

I think if your son is trying to nap at 4 it means he really needs a nap or at least rest time earlier in the day.

I just started at 12:00 in the afternoon laying with dd in bed giving her a back and tummy and face massage with a feather, doing some lavender massage before that and singing lullabies and i just ordered a kinder lyre to play during that time. After a few minutes of that i turn over and pretend to sleep or just close my eyes and meditate. We just started t his yesterday, she didnt sleep but she did lay quietly and get some rest and so did I. She was pretty tired around 5 -6 but i kept her up. I wish we coudl do a 7 bed time but dh is in charge of bedtime and it doesnt happen until at least 8...

As for our rhythm right now its: (very loose)

wake up 7 -8ish
tea time/breakfast light candle, blessing etc
dd plays indoors, i knitt, do dishes and a bit of cleaning
office work (i get online, dd plays next to me or colors next to me)
I shower while dd reads books in the bathroom
Morning outdoor play or sometimes errends
set table - get lunch read - wash hands
11:30 lunch Im trying to be strict about meal times - also candle blessing etc for lunch
potty
12 - 1 nap/ rest time

1:00 back outside or to a park or a walk or something outside

2 - 3 handwork daily activity

dinner prep

4:00 dinner - put toys away clean for night
outside play or evening walk
bath
in bed for more lyre, lavender rub etc with mommy
at some point ideally before 7 dad comes in and reads books and puts dd to sleep.

weekly rhythm now that its summer (fall dd starts preschool 2 days a week)

mondays: trip day - we go somewhere fun: waldorf school, special park, friends house etc. very little hosue work and a focus on me and dd all day sometimes lunch out together etc.

Tuesday - we pick up our csa box at the farm, deep cleaning of the house

wed - watercolor, farmers market wed eve is a big deal for dd

Thursday - laundry day and we go to the local park

Friday - bake bread, make butter bye shaking a jar of whipping cream, grocery shopping, light candles if i get to it for shabbat

[beepsandclicks]

daily rhythm

Thanks for sharing your schedule! It sounds lovely.
Last night he was asleep by 7, so today was much better---he was rested. He again did not want a nap, but also did not get tired in the afternoon. There were absolutely no melt downs and I really dug the indoor/outdoor play rhythm. We put him to bed at 7:30 this evening. As much as I love those afternoon naps, this seems to have worked well, at least for today.
I think I will incorporate some of your family's schedule in our home.
And you knit....really wish I could learn. I've actually tried to learn a couple of times, but it has not stuck yet...will keep trying, though, as I have a severe case of knit-envy.

Thanks again,
Debra

[noahs_wings]

haha i can only knit a square so ive done lots of washclothes, dish cloths, now im working on winter blankets etc.

its meditation more than anything else...

[candycat]

I have a 2 and a 3 year old. My son (3) has *never* napped. Ever. Not even as an infant. DD hasn't been able to nap much either. Our rhythm depends on the seasons, because it dictates when we can be outside. In the summer we can only be outside in the early morning; in the winter, only in midday. So.

Summer:

6:00 ish - they wake up and play in their rooms "quietly"
7 am - I wake up, we all get dressed
7:20 - breakfast
7:45 - go outside (park or walk)
9:00 - songs, free play / chores
10:00 - snack
10:15 - free play, I work on stuff
12:00 - lunch
12:30 - play together, color, etc.
1:30 - read books, knit, bake, etc.
3:30 - tea time
4:00 - bath
4:30 - jammies
5:00 - bedtime for kids, mama goes to work online, runs kid-free errands, takes belly dancing class, watches some media, blogs, etc.
7:00 - dinner for adults
7:30 - reading, bath,
9:00 - bedtime (most of the time, sometimes I cheat)

wintertime... well it's similar but we go out in the afternoon and do more baking, and try to get up a little bit later, and try to keep electric lights down in the evening

I just realized - the kids get a LOT of free play during the day. Sometimes alone (DD often wants to go in her room and play alone) and often they play together. I don't really like playing but I will sing songs to them when asked. Or I'll observe them playing or take photos of their pretends. They really enjoy that and get a kick of looking back at the end of the week and seeing their pretends preserved.

[seamama11]

My son stopped napping for a few weeks around 3, but it was obvious that he still needed naps so we went back to family naps at 1. About a month before he turned four we dropped them because bedtime was taking too long, and I love the earlier bedtime. I am not a big fan of letting my kids nap past 2 (as in start the nap after 2) because it changes when they go to bed. I also have a 2.5 daughter who needs her nap, but about once a week if we are out and about and we don't get home for her naptime, I keep her up and put her to bed super early like 6:30
Here is our rhythm, during the schoolyear it is more busy because I work in the afternoons, and my son goes to nursery school

6:45 wake up, I straighten up while kids play
7:30 Breakfast (I generally do dishes while kids eat)
8:00-9:00 get dressed and free play, or they can help me do a quick clean of each room
9:00-12:00 We are out and about. a few days a week I go to the gym and they play in the awesome daycare for an hour, or we go to the park, take a bike ride, friends' house, beach. Almost always outside running around.
12:00 Lunch and inside play
1:00 dd naps, and I get at least a solid hour to play board games with my son.
3:00 Snack and Tea time
3:30 outside play in backyard or park or bike ride
5:00 dinner, inside play
6:00 bath, jammies, books
7:00 bed

We also have things built in like Mondays we go to the library and swimming
and Fridays are often field trip days like to the discovery museum, a water park, or zoo. I keep trying to have a regular baking day, art day, and deep cleaning day, but these things do stick for us, it happens based on my mood, my pantry, and my kids interests.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE the inside/outside rhythm, it helps us all.

[beepsandclicks]

Thank you so much, candycat and seamama11, for sharing your schedules as well. I love reading other people's schedules almost as much as I love reading a new cookbook! I'm getting some good ideas.

The last two days have made it clear he still seems to need a nap. So, back to the drawing board. I think we are getting the hang of the rhythm (It is much nicer that I expected it would be! I feel much more bonded with him somehow.), so now I just need to figure out how I might best get him to at the very least lie down for a while, even if he doesn't want to sleep.

noahs_wings: washcloths! Perfect! I'd be happy with washcloths. I'm intrigued by those Japanese tawashi cloths...but maybe that is crochet? Either way, it does seem like a very relaxing thing to do with your hands.

Thanks again for your input, each and every one. Much appreciated!