Anyone ever lie to their pedi doc about....

[ladyleah]

their kid having an egg allergy to avoid the battle over the flu shot?

All the docs in this area (NJ) are pretty hardcore on the AAP schedule. They tolerate our alternative schedule re:vaxing, but I know I am up for a fight when I refuse the state mandated flu (I know we can and will write an exemption) shot...and I just don't feel like dealing with it.

Just curious....

[ErinYay]

Originally Posted by ladyleah

their kid having an egg allergy to avoid the battle over the flu shot?

All the docs in this area (NJ) are pretty hardcore on the AAP schedule. They tolerate our alternative schedule re:vaxing, but I know I am up for a fight when I refuse the state mandated flu (I know we can and will write an exemption) shot...and I just don't feel like dealing with it.

Just curious....

Nope, nor would I- it's one thing to fib a bit to others about food allergies to avoid your kiddo getting yicky food, (which I also think is a bad idea- when Aunt Thelma sees your kid eating something you're okay with that contains eggs, she may think that ALL kids will egg allergies can eat that food, or that every kid with an allergy just has a liar for a mother, etc...) but I think it's an especially bad idea to give false medical information to your medical practitioner.

Also they'll probably know you're lying.

Just stick to your guns- they can't *make* you do anything, no matter how bullish they are. The more often you calmly and assertively stick up for your beliefs, the easier it gets to do it as time goes on. If anything, it's just good practice.

[AllyRae]

Well, 2 of my kids actually *do* have an egg allergy so I don't have to lie about it, but no, I would not like to a doctor who has to make decisions about my child's health. I would find a pediatrician I *do* work well with and not have to lie. I switched pediatricians 6 times until I found one that had similar ideals to our family lifestyle. That's not to say we agree on everything, but we do agree on the big things.

But I absolutely do NOT advocate lying about food allergies...a) it will be really easy to get caught if your child ever mentions what he ate for breakfast if the pediatrician asks him and b) it will make things harder on those of us who DO have allergies and will have to start proving it to any new pediatrician if enough people lie about it. That, and your ped might ask for copies of the allergy tests--they can't write that he has allergies without actually having it diagnosed...

[texaspeach]

state mandated flu shot? really?

no, I wouldn't lie about food allergies. I do fib about sleep (how is he sleeping? fine!), but that is not pertinent to his medical care. ds has food allergies, not to eggs afaik, but I wouldn't lie about it. I would try to find a different dr though. there has to be someone around that is willing to let parents make their own choices.

[ErinYay]

Originally Posted by texaspeach

state mandated flu shot? really?

Jersey is the first to mandate the flu shot for preschool, so it's pretty much the same as any other vac in terms of exemptions.

[smpayne]

I just tell them that other family members have had really bad reactions to the flu shots in the past and I would rather not risk it, which is true. My dad had a heart attack both times he got a flu shot (age 28 & 32). While it's possible that the heart attacks were imminent, something in the flu shot set things off. A 28 year old man that is only 30lb overweight, should not be having a heart attack.

I have never had to deal with a state mandated flu shot before. We just had an opt out letter from the local school, it bothered me that you had to opt out instead of opt in.

[Addie]

I haven't and I wouldn't. If you told your ped there was an egg allergy, I can't imagine the conversation would end there - I'd think the ped would want to have a conversation about symptoms, reactions, other allergies, testing... You might be digging yourself into a hole. Regardless, if I felt compelled to lie about my child's medical condition to his medical provider, I'd find a new doctor.

[HeliMom]

If you are anywhere near Westfield NJ, our family sees a wonderful family care practitioner that is pro AP, supportive of alternative vax schedules and has never pressured me to get a flu shot.

I wouldn't lie to my doctor about allergies though. For all the reasons PP stated and also because some insurance companies can drop you if they found out you lied.

[Lauren31]

Originally Posted by Addie

I haven't and I wouldn't. If you told your ped there was an egg allergy, I can't imagine the conversation would end there - I'd think the ped would want to have a conversation about symptoms, reactions, other allergies, testing... You might be digging yourself into a hole. Regardless, if I felt compelled to lie about my child's medical condition to his medical provider, I'd find a new doctor.

[Qalliope]

I know I'm probably in the minority here, but I think it depends on the circumstances. Our family doc passed away and I haven't found anybody to replace him yet. If we were going to a walk-in clinic or something, yes I would totally lie about anything that didn't directly relate to what I came in for, if that felt easier to me. If I'm building a relationship with a doctor, that's different, and I would be more honest and firm about my boundaries and expectations. I don't see how saying, "Oh I don't want the flu shot, I think he might have an egg allergy," could interfere with a doctor's ability to treat an ear infection or administer the vaccine you do want on that day. I don't go to the doctor's office to pick a fight; I just want everything to go smoothly for the kids if we have to be there.

[ErinYay]

Originally Posted by Qalliope

I know I'm probably in the minority here, but I think it depends on the circumstances. Our family doc passed away and I haven't found anybody to replace him yet. If we were going to a walk-in clinic or something, yes I would totally lie about anything that didn't directly relate to what I came in for, if that felt easier to me. If I'm building a relationship with a doctor, that's different, and I would be more honest and firm about my boundaries and expectations. I don't see how saying, "Oh I don't want the flu shot, I think he might have an egg allergy," could interfere with a doctor's ability to treat an ear infection or administer the vaccine you do want on that day. I don't go to the doctor's office to pick a fight; I just want everything to go smoothly for the kids if we have to be there.

Lying about an egg allergy is picking a fight, though, as the medical community claims that many with egg allergies can safely get the vac, so you're really opening yourself up to an even bigger struggle than just saying "no thanks." (Source- Mayo Clinic.)

[Nicole915]

Nope, we do some delayed vaccines, but when questioned about it, I explain my position and (here is what I think is the important bit) listen to their feedback. Being open to my docs point of view has meant a much less adversarial relationship. We delay some longer than I would have without consultation, and have moved some back on the recommended schedule.

I figure, my daughter's health is my responsibility. Helping me make good decisions is my pediatrician's responsibility. Lying about medical conditions just isn't worth it, if I can be an example of a well informed parent making non traditional decisions about vaccines, that can only make it easier for the next parent walking in the room asking questions about shots.

[ladyleah]

Thanks Mammas!

I am not a good at lying....nor is my spouse-- so there is no way we could actually go through it. But it sounded like a nice idea to avoid the conversation...lolol! (the last doc we had mentioned the flu shot EVERY time we came in as something that we MUST do in the future because its TOTALLY safe and we would be HARMING our son by not doing it....) She thought I was nuts for refusing the H1N1 while pregnant....sighhhhh.

Also- we have already switched docs (just switching this week)--and "interviewed" many more (my son is 7.5 months). (Westfield won't work...but thank you though!!!) The flu shot is state mandated in NJ-- so I will just add it to my list on the religious exemption (this state is only medical and religious, btw) letter we have going since we refused the Hep B vax.

What is absolute truth is that I HAVE had a reaction to the flu vax myself-- as I have had 2 in my life (I work in a hospital where we have gotten mad pressure to get one). After I had a problem with the 2nd one I have refused them ever since. So I will be sure to bring that up.

Both docs have been ok with the alternate schedule we provide- although they would prefer we do the AAP recommended schedule. This is fine, I don't mind agreeing to disagree. I just really hate being treated like an idiot for choices we make. Honestly, I am feeling and hoping that we won't have this problem with our new doc.

[Skrimpy]

I told my DD's doctor that she had been sick several times to get out of getting her shots. Finally he told me if we didn't get the shot next time I could seek care elsewhere. I did so, and I'm glad, because I was forced to find a provider that respected my right to make choices for my child. I'm glad I was "fired" by my doctor! I hope that things go well for you with this new doc.