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The August CTA/Fertility Awareness Thread - Page 5

post #81 of 318
Quote:
Originally Posted by Toolip View Post
hummmm, well if that were true in your case, why would you have gone from testing negative from positive right at 6 dpo? Seems like you would have gotten + all along, and they wouldn't be getting darker.
Well, I was getting very, very faint, what I thought were evap lines on the ICs from the day I started testing, 5dpo from a cd13 O. They did get darker every day and I didn't consider it a real line until cd24, 11dpo from a cd13 O. If I can I'm going to try a digital test.

They say a woman can have up 4 mIU of hcg in her body all the time. Anything above 20 is considered + but anything from 5-19 is considered questionable. I guess maybe older women might produce more hcg even when not pg.
post #82 of 318
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post
They say a woman can have up 4 mIU of hcg in her body all the time. Anything above 20 is considered + but anything from 5-19 is considered questionable. I guess maybe older women might produce more hcg even when not pg.
Wouldn't a woman carrying extra hcg in her system always get faint positives on hpts then? And you've gotten negs before, even this cycle. I know, it's not very reassuring, either way. Just breathe! You can do this.

AFM - I know I need a few more high temps to confirm O, but I want to make sure I'm doing this right. Would my CL be 97.2 and my CH's at CD14?

chart link

Thanks guys!
post #83 of 318
That does look like possible O, Carrie. I'm going to address your other comment in the other thread, if I haven't already.
post #84 of 318
Hi there! I know its been so long since I've posted on here so I thought I would just give you all an update. Its not much of an update but here it is. Hope you all are doing well.

So, heres a small update on me:

So, I still dont have a prospect " TTC date" in mind, but I did have a small talk about it the other day with DH. It hit so close to my heart, that I started to cry . At first he explained that he really wasnt sure he wanted another baby, and especially not right now. Didnt know if he can handle another one, etc. I told him I wanted him to be honest with me about it, and tell me exactly how he feels. I told him that I needed to know either way. When he told me he didnt know if he wanted another baby, I told him that I was glad he told me that. However, I also told him that I dont know if I can live with myself if I dont ever have anymore children. I told him that even though I knew all of this when we were married, that I really didnt think that hard and long about it at the time, and just figured the down the road things would just work out. We talked alot about finances, goals, plans to pay off debt, to open a retirement account for him, etc. We talked about his race car and how I want to be supportive, and a part of it, etc. The reason we got on the baby subject again is because I asked him when he says "maybe in a year". what specially that means?? I told him I didnt want a year to come and go and him say "oh well maybe next year". So, thats kinda how it started, while on the phone with him when he was driving home from work, and then we finished it up as he walked in the door. I told him that was fine if he truly didnt want anymore kids but that I needed to know the truth. He basically, said "if I could KNOW I would have another boy, i'd have another one". and...."if we have another one, it would be because its what you really want". I told him well thats not right, that I want him to want it too, or I dont want to have another one. In the end [cause I had to go to work]. He had said hes been thinking alot more about it lately. And, I asked him if we could compromise and start TTW when DS turns 3, which is about 6 months away...vs a year, which is what he said originally. He asked me how far apart the neighbors kids were [we are pretty close with their family] and I told him that the older son was 3 mos. shy of 4 years old when the younger one was born. And, then I flat out said, that would mean we would need to get pregnant around the time DS turns 3 years old. He really didnt say anything about it. So, we left it at that. I totally know how he feels now. He totally knows how I feel. I guess now Im just going to let it go for a while. However, he did say to our son yesterday something like "mommy & I were going to go in the room and try and make another one of you". However, when it came time to DTD, and we were in the middle of it, I joked with him and said "I thought you told DS we were gonna make another one of him....lol"..and he's like "yeah, but not this time" or "not tonight"..or something along those lines. I thought that was kinda funny. So, we'll see if he starts to loosen up a bit about pulling out or not. I even told him last night that we couldnt "make another one of him if we wanted to last night cause I wasnt fertile yet"....lol.

So, still not time frame and no idea if or when we will ever have another baby. I mean, what would that make you think if your hubby told you what mine did? with that,I don't think I should bring it up again for 6 months. I mean, what else can I do, really. I dont have any other options, do i?? If things havent changed by then [meaning if he is still pulling out all the time by then, and/or not brining it up and/or not talking about it at all] I think 6 months is a lot of time. For both him to think about it, and to see how much DS will have grown up by then. Hopefully he will be just about completely potty trained by then. And, then if by the time DS is 3 years old, he STILL hasnt budged a bit with "when" he'll be ready or what not, then I dont know. Then, he either has to tell me he definately doesnt want anymore kids, or I just have to be happy and content with the one I have and hope that maybe one day he'll decide otherwise. OR, decide that I want another baby more than my marriage, which im totally not sure of at this moment. So, right now Im just going to enjoy our son, keep working out, work extra to try and save any amount of money that I can. and, try to have more date nights with hubby.

So, that is where we stand. What does everyone else think about this? Any suggestions, advice? Am I doing the right thing? anything I can do different? Please, suggestions, advice, opinions are always welcomed!!!

Thanks for listening!!!
post #85 of 318
Quote:
Originally Posted by mommyin2008 View Post
So, that is where we stand. What does everyone else think about this? Any suggestions, advice? Am I doing the right thing? anything I can do different? Please, suggestions, advice, opinions are always welcomed!!!
I can tell you my experience with this. When dh and I first got married I wanted 2 more kids and he only wanted 1 more. He had this ideal family image of 2 kids. After we had ds2 and he tried to make us done I just told him that I would not accept that. I wanted another baby and that was that. I know a lot of people think that's wrong but I'm not one to give up what I want for another person. My dh knows the kind of person I am. He chose to marry me. So, not my problem. He finally agreed to try for one more and I agreed that would be it. I honestly didn't think I'd want any more kids after that.

That didn't exactly work out, though. I don't know if it's because I had another boy and realized that I really want a girl or because I just love being pg and new babies so much that I can't imagine not at least leaving the option open or because I don't know what else to do with myself right now other than have babies. All I know is that I was/am not ready to completely shut the door on the possibility yet.

DH and I had a talk. He suggested getting a vasectomy and I basically forbid him. I really think that if he had done that without my consent and support I would have left him. After a lot of discussion he agreed to use withdrawal. I told him exactly how I felt. I want another baby so it's his responsibility to avoid if that's what he wants. I do not offer him info about where I am in my cycle, whether or not I'm fertile. If he wants to know, he can ask or he can look at my chart. He hears me taking my temp and sees me entering data into my chart every. Of course, he always has the option to withdraw every time so he doesn't have to worry about it. I'm not going to remind him, though. Since I have been completely honest with him I don't see it as my responsibility to make sure he follows through with what he says he wants to do. He's a mature, grown male who can do that for himself. So that was that.
post #86 of 318
Lisa, welcome. As far as what to do when you're really horny during your O time...Oral? That's what I'm thinking anyway. Is that TMI? Sorry if so. I'm not a fan of abc, so I think that's just what we're gonna do--avoid and if we get desperate find others ways to make each happy, lol.

AFM--cd23, and I think my body is gearing up to O. The mucus is starting, and I'm expecting O sometime between CD 27-30, if my pattern from last ppaf holds true. So, since we're in the fertile phase, we're abstaining right now.
post #87 of 318
Well, aside from feeling really dizzy and super exhausted today, I got a tiny, tiny bit of spotting... I want to test again tomorrow but I guess it'd be more accurate if I wait a few days. It's gonna be hard though. Now that it's settled in, I think I'd be pretty sad if I wasn't pg, even though the timing is awful.
post #88 of 318
Smyling ~ Do you have a chart? How many dpo are you?
post #89 of 318
annie - Congrats and I would go for a CD 14 or 15 O on your chart.

I remember reading somewhere that chilled urine didn't work with hpts. Don't know, that might be something to check into.

Lisa, FAM works great IF you follow the rules. If you don't, you WILL get pregnant. You have to be committed to doing it and following the rules. I don't think I have ever seen a method failure on this thread (?), but yes, there are certainly user failures every now and then. And sometimes lots at once! Although...did I miss some pregnancies? Besides annie, and the other Annie a month or so back, who is there? I admit I haven't been keeping up the best. MW is pregnant, but she was definitely not avoiding. We have several people around (including me, and Babycakes who started the thread) who are actually no longer strictly avoiding but more like whatevering or even TTC but who still post here sometimes to help others out with their charts and keep up on what everyone is up to. One of the great things about FAM is that you can decide, on a cycle-by-cycle or even day-by-day basis whether you want another pregnancy or not. I know a lot of couples just decide on the spur of the moment that they are ok with a pregnancy and BD during the fertile time. So they are no longer CTA, but CTC, ykwim? As for your backup question...I am no longer avoiding, but I used condoms during the fertile time, and I personally think that's the best way to go but a lot of women here abstain, or their husbands use withdrawal. You could also use any other barrier method (diaphragm, etc.). And I recommend charting on paper for a few cycles to begin with so you learn to interpret your charts yourself without being influenced by what fertility friend or whatever has to say. After that, fertility friend is great for sharing with others online, but continuing on with paper is also a good idea so you can do your own interpretation and customize your chart. Good luck!

MW, I have never heard that about women over 40 and hcg before! I am sure you are really pregnant, but maybe you should take a digital for peace of mind (I'm sure you will anyway, haha). I voted CD 14 on your poll.
post #90 of 318
Here's what's on the front page:

"Wholewheatchick - Due in Dec. 2010
OsUvet - Due in Feb. 2011
Echospiritwarrior - Due in Feb. 2011
Lyterae - Due in Feb. 2011
Dex_Millie - Due in Feb. 2011
AnnieA - Due in March 2011
annie2186"

I think WWC was trying to get pg so she doesn't count. We had a rash of pgs with February due dates but Echo doesn't count. She had just started TTC. I can't remember if lyterae had moved to TTC or TTW. I think dex_millie was new and didn't really know what she was doing. Didn't she get pg pretty soon after she joined? I might be getting her mixed up with someone else. I can't remember what happened with OSUvet. AnnieA and annie are both user failures and they are due in different months. Didn't we have a rash of pgs last spring, too?

On the false + thing, I think I've got it figured out based on what others have told me. I think it is mostly referring to peri-menopausal and menopausal women who may have elevated hcg levels, up to 9 mIU. That could be detected by very sensitive tests. They could also be referring to chem pgs, but I wouldn't call those false +.
post #91 of 318
Quote:
Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post
Here's what's on the front page:

"Wholewheatchick - Due in Dec. 2010
OsUvet - Due in Feb. 2011
Echospiritwarrior - Due in Feb. 2011
Lyterae - Due in Feb. 2011
Dex_Millie - Due in Feb. 2011
AnnieA - Due in March 2011
annie2186"

I think WWC was trying to get pg so she doesn't count. We had a rash of pgs with February due dates but Echo doesn't count. She had just started TTC. I can't remember if lyterae had moved to TTC or TTW. I think dex_millie was new and didn't really know what she was doing. Didn't she get pg pretty soon after she joined? I might be getting her mixed up with someone else. I can't remember what happened with OSUvet. AnnieA and annie are both user failures and they are due in different months. Didn't we have a rash of pgs last spring, too?
Right, but that's only seven pregnancies in like 6 months. And WWC, echo, and lyterae were all trying. So that makes four user error pregnancies in the last five months. I guess I wouldn't really call that everyone getting pregnant all of a sudden. For awhile, our trend was one a month, wasn't it?
post #92 of 318
Quote:
Originally Posted by BarefootScientist View Post
Right, but that's only seven pregnancies in like 6 months. And WWC, echo, and lyterae were all trying. So that makes four user error pregnancies in the last five months. I guess I wouldn't really call that everyone getting pregnant all of a sudden. For awhile, our trend was one a month, wasn't it?
Yeah, that's the point I was trying to make. I think there was a while there, too, when we didn't have any pgs. So there really have only been 4 possible accidents in at least 6 months. That's not bad, I don't think.

Maybe those who were TTW or TTC shouldn't be listed under graduates if that's going to scare people away. Maybe they should be listed under moved on/TTC/TTW and then have their EDDs listed. Make a separate section for User and Method failures. I think that's what I did when I was doing the thread.
post #93 of 318
Thread Starter 
I'm going to catch up right now, sorry for the no personals, but I just don't agree with the CH's FF gave me. I think O was CD14, not 13!! What do you guys think??

Ooh sorry, here's my chart for easy reference.
post #94 of 318
MW - Here's my chart : http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2ab1c6

I'm 11 dpo today, according to FF. I'm sharing my intercourse data for now so you can see what happened. We dtd while I was still spotting from AF (my AF is stupidly long), and a day before I got any CF. I dunno if dtd on the 14th would matter, but for the record we used w/d (no possible user error there). So if I am pg, that would make mine a method failure right? Cuz we did it on a dry day and I've NEVER O'ed before CD15 to my knowledge. Oh, and my LP is 13 days, though I've had one or two that was 12 days. So AF is due in 2-3 days.
I have two more pg tests, maybe I'll take one tomorrow and save the other for after AF is late...
post #95 of 318
Dropping in to say congrats Annie!

Depending on if you ask me or DH you would get completely different answers on if this pregnancy was planned... I had delayed ovulation (it was CD37) and DH and I opted to quit waiting for it to happen knowing that it could still happen at anytime.. I consider that "whatevering", if you ask DH he was still surprised that I got pregnant. No idea..
post #96 of 318
Carrie ~ I'd say more likely cd14, too.

Smyling ~ I'm not sure if it would be user or method failure. Hopefully, someone else can clarify this since I don't have my book to look it up. After the first 5 days, shouldn't you be cautious if you have spotting that may obscure CF until you know you are truly dry?

What's with all the early Os lately? Something strange in the air?
post #97 of 318
Quote:
Originally Posted by Smylingeyz View Post
MW - Here's my chart : http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2ab1c6

I'm 11 dpo today, according to FF. I'm sharing my intercourse data for now so you can see what happened. We dtd while I was still spotting from AF (my AF is stupidly long), and a day before I got any CF. I dunno if dtd on the 14th would matter, but for the record we used w/d (no possible user error there). So if I am pg, that would make mine a method failure right? Cuz we did it on a dry day and I've NEVER O'ed before CD15 to my knowledge. Oh, and my LP is 13 days, though I've had one or two that was 12 days. So AF is due in 2-3 days.
I have two more pg tests, maybe I'll take one tomorrow and save the other for after AF is late...
I think you could also only be 9 dpo. If you O'd early, spotting from AF can still provide semi-fertile CM so that also isn't reliable birth control. It's all in how many days the sperm can survive with or without CM. And just because you've never O'd early before, doesn't mean it can't happen. Mother Nature is fun, in that she always keeps us guessing! LOL
Anyway, i just wanted to point out those few things so that if an oops didn't happen this time, better precautions can be taken next cycle.
good luck!
post #98 of 318
Carrie: CD 14

Smilingeyz: I'm pretty sure you can't count a day w/spotting as a dry day. Dry is nothing, no sensation, nothing on the tp, nothing visible, nothing. Even if you were dry other than spotting, the spotting could obscure any CM, esp. sensation. Also, you aren't supposed to use Doering unless you have at least 6 recorded cycles to refer to, and preferably 12. I'm not sure how many you have; we seem to have lost the length of charting data from the thread starter.

And ya'll, sorry for the excitement my comment about everyone getting pg caused! I was exclaiming over annie, MW (ttw), and smilingeyz (no pg confirmed).

Lisa: A belated
As others have said, CTA works if you follow the rules! Method failures are very rare.

I think we all have higher libidos when O'ing, as we're supposed to work that way! When CTA you can do any number of things during your unsafe times, from complete abstention (required by some religious teachings) to w/d or condoms, etc, with a variety of alternate activities... Keep in mind if you do choose to have intercourse during your unsafe times, your effectiveness is determined by the backup method you choose.

I highly recommend paper charting while you are learning the ropes. The online programs are great for sharing your chart here, but you really need to learn how to do your own interpretation & not rely on software for that. Also, you should strongly consider using a backup method continuously for the first few cycles until you learn the ropes and really have a handle on the way things work.

When did your cycles return after DS 1? If you are exclusively breastfeeding, I highly recommend reading up on ecological breastfeeding (Sheila Kippley has a couple of books on it). If you aren't currently cycling, it may be very frustrating to try to chart.

And yes, you do need a basal therm, although there are a few rare women who can make CTA work with a regular one. From my observations you'll eliminate a lot of confusion by spending the $10 up front!

MW: That's so weird about all the time HCG in older women!
post #99 of 318
Baby Cakes, I could go for CD 14. You need another temp to confirm, obviously...

Smyling, as MW and MM said, spotting can obscure your CF, but on the other hand, if you are sure you were dry then you were sure, right? So you may be ok, hopefully the sperm died before the wet CF started. Also I think it is likely that you didn't O that early - your temps look like it but you do have CF a few days after. My chart was like that last cycle - I was wondering if I O'd super-early (CD 13 when my earliest before was CD 17) because I had a thermal shift then but it turns out I O'd more like CD 16, which matched my CF and my LP.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MovingMomma View Post
And ya'll, sorry for the excitement my comment about everyone getting pg caused! I was exclaiming over annie, MW (ttw), and smilingeyz (no pg confirmed).
No worries, I was mostly just wondering if I had missed a day on my email subscription and forgotten to congratulate or commiserate with someone.
post #100 of 318
We did have a crazy long no streak -- I joined in August, and wasn't WWC the first BFP since then? Maybe I'm forgetting someone. . . But that's 7 months and a lotta ladies charting.

Smilingeyz: I think there's good chance you didn't O until CD 14 -- am I wishful thinking for you? I notice the month before you had CP: HSO a few days before O. . . in any case for whatever you're hoping for!
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