New to HSing, polly pockets and TV question?

[BreatheMama]

Hi, I am new to HS, I have a 4.5 year old and a 1 year old. We are just starting to get together with a co-op and are really excited. I'm not sure how it will all work out, I think we will have an "eclectic" type of format. We have been deprogramming from a preschool nightmare. Anyhow, I was just wondering how to deal with oldest dd asking for me to "play polly" all the time with her and if I'm unable then she wants to watch TV!!!

We are pretty laid back and for the fall I was thinking of establishing a loose, dynamic daily and weekly flow.

So for my question: Should I implement scheduled TV time and should I just give in to the polly pockets and just hope the infatuation ends soon ?

I just feel sooooo bored with the polly pockets, I so much better with the crafts, music, reading, nature etc.....but it's what she would choose to do 9/10 times? Thanks

[camracrazy]

Could you incorporate Polly Pocket into your lessons?

You could count how many PP's she has, add them, and subtract them. That's math. PP could go on a nature walk with you. You could bring stuff back to build her a little park or campground of her own in a shoebox or other box. Some remnant fabric could be Polly's sleeping bag for her outdoor adventures. You could definately make up some stories that Polly is the star of. You could start off the story and then ask your dd what happens next. Take turns adding to the story until Polly has a big finish. You could even write or type it out and add pictures.

[SundayCrepes]

My son is 4.5. He does not realize that TV stations exist. When he was 3 we decided that if we totally deny him "TV" it could be an issue so we started buying him dvd documentaries. Since my husband and I have always watched documentaries when he was around this didn't seem unusual to him. He mainly watches dvds or youtube when I am putting my little one down for a nap. It started out as a necessity--if he didn't watch TV then he wanted to be with me while I was lying on our bed nursing her down. That wasn't conducive to her napping. So I let him watch a dvd and he left us alone. It's turned into a routine. I put her down for a nap, he has screen time, when her nap is over (if not before) screen gets turned off. He rarely asks for screen time beyond that. It works for us--and boy does he know a lot about firetrucks (dvds) and making donuts (youtube.)

[WhaleinGaloshes]

Oh my gosh with the Polly Pockets!!

My daughter is the same age. Also the Littlest Pet Shops and Playmobile figures but really, whichever toy it is has little to do with it it's just the beg beg begging to play dolls with me dawn to dusk.

It's so NOT fun.

And yes, I work very hard to organize all kinds of other fun trips, crafts, arts, lessons, outings...which she does enjoy. But...Polly!!!

It's just the right-now attention need thing.

For the summer, we had a brainstorming session and struck a deal, which is basically a structure that says 'I recognize she needs this one-on-one role-playing playtime and I will do my damnedest to help her with this or die trying ; and she 'recognizes the need for the day to Move.On. already and needs to cooperate and do other things along with me and be helpful and have a decent attitude and play by herself while I work, too.' We wrote it all down together, very dramatic.

But, it's helped. I pledged to her a minimum of 60 minutes of PP playtime given that the day was flowing and other things were getting done with out significant conflict.

It's working decently, I'd give us a B. And we are getting our errands/enough other activities to satisfy me/enough alone time/clean house/you know what I mean done. [I try to take a book into the PP time with me and not make it too obvious that I'm skimming it (sometimes my Polly's 'read with me'...she doesn't buy it )]

I have more in the past and still do nudge the Polly roleplaying to homeschooly type directions. It 'works' but it is backfires some by not satisfying that 'itch' that she's scratching with the PP games...we're more efficient learning without the PP and more efficient playing PP without the superimposed 'learning' and it ends up being less productive all around. Plus, it is much easier for her to be excited and engaged in other activities when she's gotten her little PP cup filled

An exception to this is that I do stage plays with my PPs and encourage her to do the same, but that's as much for my own entertainment as anything else. It is one of the more worthwhile PP activities IMHO. Since the PP play is usually roleplaying families, all on her own she often has her parent PP give lessons (especially math lessons for whatever reason) to her child PPs. So we have that going for us, too.

That's a long answer (you'll have to forgive me, I'm avoiding playing Polly Pocket ) but all that to say, I do feel we've achieved at least an 80% at the same goal you stated, to have an organic/flexible/loose but productive, motivating flow to the day. I have a box system for myself (DD is only peripherally aware of it) that I use to be sure I'm hitting all the areas in her HS that I want to. And I think I go to bed feeling like we got somewhere and she goes to bed without feeling like she got dragged through the day and what she enjoys was ignored.

On the TV: that has been an issue in the past but for now we have a nice balance with it. If your daughter is like mine, I'm willing to bet that if you can get some balance with the one-on-one playing, the TV will recede back into the manageable background. Or it may not, but if my house looked like what you describe (and it has before, definitely) I'd try to work a deal on the playing first and then address the TV if it was still an issue.

[Savoir Faire]

Do not give into the TV. We stopped allowing it in the morning (and we don't do TV, we only do movies) and it has changed our lives.

My kids know that the only thing they'll get by asking for constant TV is no TV.

AS for Polly Pocket, I personally don't believe you can be your child's 24 hour playmate. You're an adult. You have adult things to do sometime. Meals have to get made. House cleaned....plus other things.

I don't mind playing with my kids sometimes but not all the time. And if you really hate Polly Pocket, find something else to do. Play a board game. Color. Paint.

[BreatheMama]

Thanks for the replies. Yeah, its the near constant "mom, can you play polly"? And I do say no when I have to do "housework" etc...but when we have the time to play together its her go to choice! The other thing about them is the small pieces, it is impossible to play PP with little dd around, the pieces become chew toys.

The TV issue, I have started a slow ween, it started like someone else said, as a quiet activity while I nursed and put the baby down for a nap. I was reading some where else on MDC and a mother mentioned the response from her kids when the answer is no to TV, at first its like massive "no tv crabbiness", "I dont know what to do" etc...but then it has been so interesting to she her develop some sort game or imaginary world.

As for the filling up the PP cup, I love that! Yes I have found that if I dedicate some time to focused PP play, it sustains her for a time.

Anyone have a screen time schedule? Like time limits per day?

[mommy68]

I think 4.5 is a bit young to expect too much out of them. But using the Polly Pockets as a prop while doing her school work is a great idea. Have them be students in her classroom and she can learn along with them or even teach them. I would probably wait a while longer before doing actual school work with a child this age, but that's just me.

[titania8]

Originally Posted by BreatheMama

Thanks for the replies. Yeah, its the near constant "mom, can you play polly"? And I do say no when I have to do "housework" etc...but when we have the time to play together its her go to choice! The other thing about them is the small pieces, it is impossible to play PP with little dd around, the pieces become chew toys.

The TV issue, I have started a slow ween, it started like someone else said, as a quiet activity while I nursed and put the baby down for a nap. I was reading some where else on MDC and a mother mentioned the response from her kids when the answer is no to TV, at first its like massive "no tv crabbiness", "I dont know what to do" etc...but then it has been so interesting to she her develop some sort game or imaginary world.

As for the filling up the PP cup, I love that! Yes I have found that if I dedicate some time to focused PP play, it sustains her for a time.

Anyone have a screen time schedule? Like time limits per day?

my boys are 4.5 and they watch dvr'd kids shows when their brother naps. usually 60-90 mins. i have big dreams of one day having them be tv free again, but i don't honestly think that will happen. they LOVE tv time, and tbh, i do too.

[waiflywaif]

And I do say no when I have to do "housework" etc...but when we have the time to play together its her go to choice!

I don't think it should necessarily always be her choice. If it were me, I'd play Polly Pockets *sometimes* but other times I'd tell her that we have to find something we both like.

My DD knows that I don't play Monopoly because I hate it. I'll suggest other board games and she'll reject the ones she doesn't care for either. We come up with a mutually agreeable game.

[Casha'sMommy]

Originally Posted by waiflywaif

I don't think it should necessarily always be her choice. If it were me, I'd play Polly Pockets *sometimes* but other times I'd tell her that we have to find something we both like.

My DD knows that I don't play Monopoly because I hate it. I'll suggest other board games and she'll reject the ones she doesn't care for either. We come up with a mutually agreeable game.

This is what I was going to suggest.
I think it's important to teach my dc how to compromise. That means playing what they want sometimes and playing what I want sometimes. DD always wants to play tea party or dr's office. The funny part about the dr's office is she isn't acting like a pedi because of her own limited experiences with dr's. She acts like one of my many dr's she tags along to so she asks funny questions like "Has the awopizza (alopecia) gotten better or worse?" lmao
Back to compromise. If they don't know how to compromise I fear they'll have playground/friend issues down the road. It is, afterall, my job to teach them how to be productive citizens and I think learning to compromise is part of that.

[skueppers]

I don't do fantasy play with my kids at all. That's what they have each other and playdates with their friends for.

If they want to spend time with me, it needs to be some activity we both enjoy, like reading or board games.

I don't think it's unreasonable to say no to Polly Pockets, as long as she has other kids to do that with on a regular basis.

[zjande]

Oh man, I have only boys (my dd is grown)-- I would LOVE to play some polly pockets! Instead I'm stuck with swords & bad guys & building/construction toys. I'd really prefer some nice PP. And maybe some dollies, horses & Barbies. LOL

I'm just being silly. I'm sure I'd tire of the girly toys eventually as well! I wanted to mention that with my 4.5 yr old & 2.5 yr old, we allow one movie every night before bed. We don't do any tv or have any stations. I like having a scheduled movie every night because that way I can tell my kids when they ask for a movie "no, it's not movie time". Period. That was a sanity saver after months & months of my 4 yr old begging for movies all.day.long. Now I tell him to stop asking me until 7:00pm. Or, in other parts of the year, "stop asking me about movies until it's dark outside."