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Breastfeeding in the car - Page 2

post #21 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by WindyCityMom View Post
If I had those breasts that you see in National Geographic, and could just sling one over the side of the car seat, then maybe. But these A cups sure ain't cuttin' it.
Yeah, I have those, and if DS had been able to nurse (he had trouble for other reasons), it would have been easy to nurse him in the car seat without moving my upper body over him at all. I might have had to lean directly forward but not to the side or anything.
post #22 of 61
I've done it, and I'll keep doing it if I have to. If my first daughter was in her seat she screamed. I nursed her EVERY time we were in the car, and I didn't drive because I couldn't handle the screaming while driving. I am large breasted and I'd rather have my floppy soft breast in her face then a hard plastic bottle if anything happened. My second daughter refuses a bottle or pacifier of any sort so that's just not an option sometimes.

What would you do if your child screamed like they were in pain every time you put them in the car seat, refused to take an artificial nipple of any sort, and were in weather or distances where walking/biking/bussing were not an option? What would you do in that circumstance for TWO YEARS?

If I nurse her in her seat we MAY be in an accident where there MAY be injuries. If I don't nurse her in her seat she WILL experience the trauma of being left to scream EVERY SINGLE TIME.
post #23 of 61
Dr. Sears actually RECOMMENDS it in his baby book.
post #24 of 61
My DD has always hated the carseat. She's 22 months and RF. When she was tiny, I would ride in the back with her and let her suck on my pinky finger, because she never took a pacifier. Now I sing NONSTOP, it seems like, when we're in the car. She makes requests and I sing whatever song she wants. If we're on a longer trip and my DH is driving, I'll sit in the back with her and read books to her.
I never nursed her while she was in her seat and the car was in motion- it's dangerous! Say whatever you want about calculated risks, to me the risk of leaning my body over my child in a moving car is the same as taking my child out of the carseat in a moving car- neither is an option. I think it's important to find other ways of comforting your child besides nursing, for this very reason.
post #25 of 61
I did it one time when my son was a baby and rear-facing. Not only was it incredibly uncomfortable and impossible to get a good latch, but it even felt incredibly unsafe! I was holding my breath praying we would not get in an accident the entire three minutes I did it.
I had a frequent nurser but he mostly slept in the car.
post #26 of 61
Sure it's not safe, but a distracted driver isn't safe either. Talking on a cell phone while driving is about the same risk as driving drunk, so why is driving with your loved one screaming in the backseat when there is a workable solution not a concern? Of course it's better to find a different way to calm the child, but pulling over, binkies, bottles and toys don't work for all kids . Sure, breastfeeding while driving increases the risk to the child if you get in an accident, but it can reduce driver distraction, making the likelihood of an accident less, which is good for the baby, the mother, the driver, and everybody else on the road.
post #27 of 61
Count me among the car-seat nursers. I've also go "National Geographic" boobs (Although I prefer the term "go-go-gadget boobies") and the ONLY thing over my baby when we do it is my boob. I don't do it while i'm driving of course, but if DP is driving and she's losing it, I'm not going to let her suffer when I've got what she wants right in my bra. That's just mean. I'm able to leave my seatbelt on and in the right position - honestly, I'm less safe when I'm leaning forward digging in my purse for my cell phone or a tissue.

The only time we've had a problem is when DP drove over a cattle guard while I was nursing and DD about bit my nipple off.

The risk of an accident because DP is distracted by her screaming is much greater, IMO.
post #28 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by rachelsmama View Post
Sure it's not safe, but a distracted driver isn't safe either. Talking on a cell phone while driving is about the same risk as driving drunk, so why is driving with your loved one screaming in the backseat when there is a workable solution not a concern? Of course it's better to find a different way to calm the child, but pulling over, binkies, bottles and toys don't work for all kids . Sure, breastfeeding while driving increases the risk to the child if you get in an accident, but it can reduce driver distraction, making the likelihood of an accident less, which is good for the baby, the mother, the driver, and everybody else on the road.
Exactly. There's a reason that when a new driver gets their license they aren't allowed to drive with friends...even talking to passengers is a distraction. I've noticed that DH's driving gets a little more erratic and rushed when DS really gets going. My DS would never take a pacifier (we waited too long to introduce it or whatever), I didn't have the supply to pump enough to do bottles for trips, and in Texas there are a lot of long stretches of road with nowhere to pull over safely. I'd rather take the risk with myself and lean over to nurse (still belted around the waist...better than nothing, right?) than have DH pull over on a busy highway and risk some idiot hitting the stopped car.
post #29 of 61
I've done it, mostly on the highway for long drives. We did pull over to stop when we could, but sometimes he'd want to nurse right away after we had stopped.

When DS was RF, I usually had to lean forward a bit to get there, but I kept the shoulder belt on. Count me in the "National Geographic" size too. I've always made a point to keep most of me on the non-baby side of the carseat, but I must admit that sometimes my right arm has been on the seat stabilizing us.

I've even managed a little bit when DS was FF and I was beside him.
post #30 of 61
Yeouch about the nipple story. I have to admit The World According to Garp came to mind when this topic first came up. I do live in a carcentric city, my daughter did scream the entire time she was in the car, it really does suck. I hope no one feels like I'm judging them when I said it never crossed my mind to nurse in the car. I'm sure many are judging me for letting her cry until we could safely stop. Most of my earlier post was directed at the breastfeeding the baby in the lap while driving story which admittedly is not the real topic of the thread.

I certainly do things that involve risk after determining the benefits are worth it. I just try not to mess around with physics 'cause that meanie gives no quarter .
post #31 of 61
Count me in with the itty-bitty-boobie club who is convinced that there is no way on earth I could nurse a baby in a carseat, let alone while buckled in, let alone in a moving vehicle! Seriously, the physics alone boggle my mind!

Does no one travel with a pump? Or will those babies not take a bottle? Yeah, pumping and bottle feeding is a pain (literally and figuratively) when you can do it right from the source, but given the safety benefits, why not? Just tring to figure out why that wasn't mentioned yet...
post #32 of 61
I don't think I ever, with four kids, nursed them in a moving vehicle (buckled or not). I do recall, many o many of times where the second we arrived at our destination (or where DH pulled over), I was unbuckling a hungry baby and nursing in the front seat.

Maybe part of it is that I rarely sat in the back seat (no room now), so feeding them while they were strapped into the car seat just didn't really cross my mind.
post #33 of 61
I don't travel with a pump. Never occured to me - pump stays at work, where it is needed.

"I nurse in the car and I really don't feel it is that dangerous *for me*. I am still buckled in and all I literally do is lean forward and flop my breast over the side of the seat for DD to nurse. I have very large floppy breasts and this is one instance where they come in handy, literally only my breast is over DD's seat. If I'm not nursing her I'm leaned a bit over entertaining her anyways usually with my arm across her seat and my head leaned over so she can see me. More of my body is over her seat in this instance then when I am nursing her.
Letting her scream bloody murder when there is another driver is just not an option for us. It is extremely distracting to try and drive while she is screaming, especially in stop and go, low speed city traffic."



I don't do this on a regular basis, but I do feel the need on occasion. I feel super mean for withholding what he *needs* and DH drives way crazier when the baby is screaming in the backseat. If it is less than 10 minutes where we are going, then yeah, babe will wait. Any more than that, I move to the back seat and take whatever measures necessary. Yeah, I try non-boob measures first. but usually, by the time he is that upset, only the boob is going to work, and often it only takes a minute or three, to get him calm enough to use the non-boob measures (singing, playing, etc)
post #34 of 61
Thread Starter 
I realize now that I am kind of the 'odd one out' in that screaming/crying from a child doesn't impact my ability to drive. Of course hearing my child upset is upsetting to me, but it doesn't cause that level of distress when I know that he is safe, though maybe not happy.

I do remember that when I had my first the crying was far more distressing to me than it is with my third. I did pull over in parking lots etc with her. Now, I have two other kids who need to get where they are going to be happy, and my youngest is a super high needs baby- his frustration would be fueled by a quick stop to nurse without being allowed to remain held/nursed while driving. I also realize that I drive a minivan with captain's seats in the back, so 'leaning over' is a lot more complicated than when sitting in the bench seat of a car, for instance. While I have National Geographic-esque breasts, they'd need to be Ripley's Believe It Or Not-esque to span the gap between the seats back there.

The vast majority of the time I respond to my kids right away, and I do so in the car as well when they are cranky, but I use other soothing measures, and I make it a point to make sure my babies take a bottle fairly early on and go back and forth well. It's funny how we can judge people for taking risks we aren't comfortable with, and other people judge parenting choices they aren't comfortable with.
post #35 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mosaic View Post
Does no one travel with a pump? Or will those babies not take a bottle? Yeah, pumping and bottle feeding is a pain (literally and figuratively) when you can do it right from the source, but given the safety benefits, why not? Just tring to figure out why that wasn't mentioned yet...
I did that with my first on a couple of night time drives. Just took my hand pump and a bottle. It worked ok then.

Quote:
Originally Posted by confustication View Post
I do remember that when I had my first the crying was far more distressing to me than it is with my third. I did pull over in parking lots etc with her. Now, I have two other kids who need to get where they are going to be happy, and my youngest is a super high needs baby- his frustration would be fueled by a quick stop to nurse without being allowed to remain held/nursed while driving.
Ditto on the first to third child. Fortunately my 3rd child isn't all that high needs. But as long as I know she's not hungry, I will try to get where I'm going as soon as possible. Sometimes she just wants held or out of her seat, and I understand that, but when you have to get the older child to school or what not, the baby has to wait for the 10 minute drive, kwim? I do try to make it up to her when we get where we are. And if she's super upset and doesn't calm down after a few minutes and it's feasible I stop. But honestly, at a very young age she figured out she's happier if she just leans over and sleeps for the ride and does that all the time now. If I'd stopped every time she cried like I would with my first that would have never happened.
post #36 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paigekitten View Post
What would you do if your child screamed like they were in pain every time you put them in the car seat, refused to take an artificial nipple of any sort, and were in weather or distances where walking/biking/bussing were not an option? What would you do in that circumstance for TWO YEARS?
.
I'd rather have a screaming baby then one I killed when my body crushed them in a crash.

I stayed home a lot with ds and limited trips when we HAD to go get groceries and things, and he would suck my finger sometimes, or I even gave him a cup with expressed BM. I also nursed him right before every trip and tried to leave when I knew he was tired.

It sucked big time to have him cry, but its not safe to lean out of position to nurse, for you or the baby.
post #37 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by leighi123 View Post
I'd rather have a screaming baby then one I killed when my body crushed them in a crash.

I stayed home a lot with ds and limited trips when we HAD to go get groceries and things, and he would suck my finger sometimes, or I even gave him a cup with expressed BM. I also nursed him right before every trip and tried to leave when I knew he was tired.

It sucked big time to have him cry, but its not safe to lean out of position to nurse, for you or the baby.
But again, what if you're just flopping and pointing your boob to his mouth, not leaning over him?
post #38 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by leighi123 View Post
It sucked big time to have him cry, but its not safe to lean out of position to nurse, for you or the baby.
Technically it's not "dangerous" or "safe" it's just different levels of risk and different levels of benefits. Riding in a car has risks, staying home has risks, nursing in the carseat has risks, letting the baby scream his little head off has risks....there is no "right" answer because we can't predict the future. "Not safe" is your assessment based on your circumstances, it is valid, but doesn't necessarily apply to everybody's circumstances since babies', drivers, and driving conditions are all highly variable.

A major factor in this argument is that we don't all share the same priorities. Some of us assume there will be a crash and try to minimise the risks if that happens, some of us are most interested in minimising the risk of getting in a crash in the first place, and some of us factor mental health into the equation as well, while others put the priority on physical well-being.
post #39 of 61
rachelsmama - very well put!
post #40 of 61
is it any more "unsafe" than reading a book to a kid in a car seat? I mean I have to lean over so ds can see the pictures and I can see the words? Would one say "OMG that person suggested READING to help calm a kid in a carseat!!!"
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