Church

[SavingtheEarth]

Recently I was nursing the sanctuary at our church. I did not use a cover. I was then approached by the wife of one of the elders, I would either have to use a cover or nurse in the mothers room. I never thought, of all the places, that I would be asked to nurse using a cover. I am not an immodest person, I wear a nursing tank and a tee shirt, keeping all but what is necessary exposed. I don't necessarily have any issue covering up, and truth be told the only reason I didn't use a cover was I didn't have a blanket, (who carries a blanket in 100 degree weather?) I am VERY frustrated. Anyone have any suggestions or ideas. Should I just shut up and cover up?

[momtoS]

Hmmmmm I would actually nurse in the pews. Uncovered but discreet.

GOD MADE BREASTS FOR THE PURPOSE OF BREASTFEEDING.

[tracymom1]

Originally Posted by momtoS

Hmmmmm I would actually nurse in the pews. Uncovered but discreet.

GOD MADE BREASTS FOR THE PURPOSE OF BREASTFEEDING.

This. Period. Or find a new church.

What nonsense!!! At my synagogue (which is conservative) nobody would blink an eye at a breastfeeding mother. It is considered a blessing to be able to feed and soothe your child.

[woodchick]

I never nursed DD1 in church because she was so distracted by being there that she never wanted to nurse!

I do nurse DD2 in the pew if she asks for it (she's 16mos, so sometimes she does, but not always). I have never had anyone look askance at me at all. I do not 'cover' but wear shirts that allow me to nurse comfortably without anything showing (jersey tops, tanks, etc. I can't nurse in a button-down!)

OP- what state are you in? You might have legal protection despite what the 'wife of an elder' says.

Did she say anything else to you? or you to her? I would probably have said something to the effect of "I really find value in being in the sanctuary with my child(ren) consistantly from an early age. How better to welcome them into the faith! Is there a specific reason that you are asking us to leave?" and then go from there.

Is this a church you have attended for a while? How old is your babe? Are there other families? Maybe they aren't used to having little ones around or the other moms would rather use the Mother's room? Most likely, someone suggested that mothers might prefer a mother's room and others started to assume that they all should. This could open up a greater dialogue about children in church.

[SavingtheEarth]

I have only been attending this church for less than a year.

Most likely, someone suggested that mothers might prefer a mother's room and others started to assume that they all should.

I had never thought about it like that. My infant is 6 months. I just wanted some feedback from others that I am not out of line. This wife was visibly uncomfortable bringing this to my attention. In not so many words she sided with me. I think what has bothered me most is that these men sat around during a "meeting" and discussed this "situation". The thing that has bothered my husband is that he sees more cleavage (which is optional) than what I was "showing".

[MissMommyNiceNice]

I never understand this...how do they think Jesus was fed?

I never appreciate being asked to nurse anywhere other than where I am when my baby is hungry. Obviously if it was such a big thing that they discussed it at a meeting, it is more endemic than a single incident. It's yet another example of people who think they know better than the rest of us making decisions about what is appropriate or classifying the act of breastfeeding as something other than a natural way to feed your child. My number one question when that happens is, "will you make the bottle feeding moms go to the mothers room?" or the bathroom? or whatever ridiculous place they want to send you. The answer is almost always "no" and I tell them I won't either.

[boobs4milk]

i'd contact the pastor and get his/her opinion. if the pastor has issues with it and demands that you cover or hide, you can always get a new church.

[cocoanib]

It truly baffles me when places like churches, kids gyms, community centers, etc have a problem with nursing mothers. Of all the places you should be "safe" a church should bge at the top of the list.

[Ellien C]

Brings some pictures of "nursing madonnas?" Really, I don't have any advice for you. I think you should nurse wherever you are comfortable and I'm really sorry if someone made you uncomfortable nursing in the sanctuary. I nurse in church all the time.

[akind1]

At church, I usually do go to either the nursery or the overflow room (usually the worship team is in there) IF DS needs to nurse during service. It isn't an issue of discretion, but of distractability.

However: If DS being easily distracted was a non-issue, I think it is my choice to cover or not, and sometimes I don't. Often I will start with a cover or light blanket (the Aiden and Anais muslin ones are huge and very light) for latch on, but if DS pulls it off, I leave it off. Too many moms in our church BF for this to be a real issue I think. BUT all of them cover or leave service, because they are more comfortable doing that.

In a nutshell: I would go with your gut; you and your baby should be comfortable where you worship. If the church is not comfortable with YOU, then it isn't the right fit.