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The guilt of FF - Page 3

post #41 of 66
So you'd rather take a hyperventilating, vomiting 2 year old instead?
post #42 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissE View Post
So you'd rather take a hyperventilating, vomiting 2 year old instead?
Would I like to? No. Would I and have I? Yes. It's awful, it sucks. This too shall pass.
post #43 of 66
Hmm...pick your battles is my motto.
post #44 of 66
I can't think of a battle more worth picking
post #45 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissE View Post
Do y'all only have on child or are there mamas with two or more kids? DD would NOT go in ther RF seat anymore without throwing a major fit (that was abuot two months ago, she's now 2 years old). She saw her brother's seat (who's FF at 3.5 years) and wanted to go in "Adi's seat, Adi's seat" So I turned her forward and she was happy. The only thing now is that she keeps losing her toys as they fall down instead of being held in place by the back of the carseat.
My just turned 3yo wants to ride in his brothers booster. No way that is happening, no matter how much he wants to.
post #46 of 66
Wow I feel like a really bad Mama now. My DD is 14.5 months, and has been front facing for about 8 months now. She screamed bloodly murder until we turned her.
post #47 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by BabyMae09 View Post
Wow I feel like a really bad Mama now. My DD is 14.5 months, and has been front facing for about 8 months now. She screamed bloodly murder until we turned her.

since she was 6 months?! Can you turn her back rear-facing tomorrow? 14 months is still really young to be forward-facing.
post #48 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by an_aurora View Post
I can't think of a battle more worth picking
I can think of a few dozen....
post #49 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by BabyMae09 View Post
I can think of a few dozen....
None that would be more likely to save a child's life & well being.
post #50 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by Drummer's Wife View Post
since she was 6 months?! Can you turn her back rear-facing tomorrow? 14 months is still really young to be forward-facing.
Not really. You'd have to know my daughter... she is STUBBORN. I think the term 'high needs' fits her pretty well DP and I decided a long time ago that it was safer for everyone in the car if we didn't have to listen to a screaming baby while driving. Have to consider the safety of all of us....
post #51 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by an_aurora View Post
None that would be more likely to save a child's life & well being.
hmmm....

1. un-needed c-setions and other interventions

2. potentially harmful vax

3. circumcision - not only affects the baby, but all his possible future children, his wife, etc.

4. unsafe co-sleeping

5. unsafe baby-wearing

etc, etc.

Sometimes I like to play the devil's advocate, just to remind people that there ARE other, valid opinions out there
post #52 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by BabyMae09 View Post
hmmm....

1. un-needed c-setions and other interventions

2. potentially harmful vax

3. circumcision - not only affects the baby, but all his possible future children, his wife, etc.

4. unsafe co-sleeping

5. unsafe baby-wearing

etc, etc.

Sometimes I like to play the devil's advocate, just to remind people that there ARE other, valid opinions out there
Those are all legitamate arguments, yes, but none are of those are as dangerous (statistically) as early FF
post #53 of 66
Hmm, well I just did some more research, and there's a lot that I didn't know. I was basing my FF on what I did with my son. But he's 8.5 now, so things were a lot different 'way back then!'

I don't know if I'll turn DD around or not (due to her personality - I'll at least try it), but I'll definitely leave any future children FF until age two
post #54 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by an_aurora View Post
Those are all legitamate arguments, yes, but none are of those are as dangerous (statistically) as early FF
Well, except maybe the c-section and circumcision. But I get your point
post #55 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by BabyMae09 View Post
Not really. You'd have to know my daughter... she is STUBBORN. I think the term 'high needs' fits her pretty well DP and I decided a long time ago that it was safer for everyone in the car if we didn't have to listen to a screaming baby while driving. Have to consider the safety of all of us....
I hear you on the stubborn child thing-my middle child is very much like her mama in that respect but she RF'd until 3. Normally I would have RF'd longer, but I gave in and turned her. RF is STILL safer than FF with screaming, as hard as it is to deal with (and like I said earlier, 2 of my 3 were/are screamers).
post #56 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by BabyMae09 View Post
Well, except maybe the c-section and circumcision. But I get your point
Both are less likely to cause (severe) injury and death . I agree with you, though, and all the points you listed in the above points are one that I, too, argue, but they are just not even in the same realm. Car crashes are the leading cause of death for people under the age of 14, and ERF is paramount in reducing those deaths.
post #57 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissE View Post
Do y'all only have on child or are there mamas with two or more kids? DD would NOT go in ther RF seat anymore without throwing a major fit (that was abuot two months ago, she's now 2 years old). She saw her brother's seat (who's FF at 3.5 years) and wanted to go in "Adi's seat, Adi's seat" So I turned her forward and she was happy. The only thing now is that she keeps losing her toys as they fall down instead of being held in place by the back of the carseat.
I have 3 kids: a 5.5-year-old (FF Radian), a 3.75-year-old (RF Radian XTSL), and an 11-month-old (RF Radian). I found that, before the baby was born, having my son and daughter side-by-side, one RF and one FF, worked really well. They could see each other, talk to each other, et cetera. Since the baby was born a year ago, we've alternated between having my son's FF seat between the two RF girls, and having his seat in the 3rd row of our van.

My almost-4-year-old has begun to express some discontent with her RF riding position. And I agree that many things will become "easier" once she's FF. She asks to ride in her brother's seat a lot, and if he's not in the car (while he's at school, for example), I let her. She is better able to see things outside the car, it's easier to have a conversation with her, et cetera.

The bottom line, though, is that she's safest RF even if she's most pleased FF. I have to enforce all sorts of "better, but less fun" standards with my kids--I don't let them drink sugary drinks, they can't get in my parents' pool without an adult watching, they don't get to watch TV or play video games at home, et cetera. I mean, really, my kids would probably be *happiest* if they weren't restrained at all; they might rather ride on the roof of the van, playing video games and drinking Dr. Pepper. =)
post #58 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by BabyMae09 View Post
hmmm....

1. un-needed c-setions and other interventions

2. potentially harmful vax

3. circumcision - not only affects the baby, but all his possible future children, his wife, etc.

4. unsafe co-sleeping

5. unsafe baby-wearing

etc, etc.

Sometimes I like to play the devil's advocate, just to remind people that there ARE other, valid opinions out there
These are all issues that I am passionate about too. But, none of them are NEARLY as potentially deadly as being improperly restrained in the car. Car crashes kill more children each year than anything else. It is imperative that parents know the risks of FF at an early age and the safety benefits of RF past the traditional 1 year/20 pounds.

If someone FF their 3 year old, I suppose I would consider that a valid choice, even though I'm intending to RF my child past 3 years. But, IMO (and in the opinion of virtually anyone who understands crash physics and the anatomy of a baby's neck and spine), FF an infant is NEVER a valid option. That is an extremely dangerous (not to mention illegal) choice. In a bad frontal or side-impact crash, a FF 6 month old would almost definitely be seriously injured or killed. And a 1 year old is much more likely to be severely injured or killed when FF than RF.
post #59 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by redpajama View Post

The bottom line, though, is that she's safest RF even if she's most pleased FF. I have in enforce all sorts of "better, but less fun" standards with my kids--I don't let them drink sugary drinks, they can't get in my parents' pool without an adult watching, they don't get to watch TV or play video games at home, et cetera. I mean, really, my kids would probably be *happiest* if they weren't restrained at all; they might rather ride on the roof of the van, playing video games and drinking Dr. Pepper. =)
post #60 of 66
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissE View Post
Do y'all only have on child or are there mamas with two or more kids? DD would NOT go in ther RF seat anymore without throwing a major fit (that was abuot two months ago, she's now 2 years old). She saw her brother's seat (who's FF at 3.5 years) and wanted to go in "Adi's seat, Adi's seat" So I turned her forward and she was happy. The only thing now is that she keeps losing her toys as they fall down instead of being held in place by the back of the carseat.
My son will be four at the end of August and he has one friend his age who is still rearfacing and every other kid his age that we know is forward facing at best, some are in boosters (even though the law here is minimum 4 years and 40lbs for boostering). I don't understand why this would make the decision for you at all. I ride forward facing obviously, as do the other adults in the car as well as the older kids we ride with. That isn't a good enough reason for a kid who can be safely rearfacing and gain significant safety protection from it not to do so.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MissE View Post
So you'd rather take a hyperventilating, vomiting 2 year old instead?
Quote:
Originally Posted by mama_ani View Post
Would I like to? No. Would I and have I? Yes. It's awful, it sucks. This too shall pass.
I agree with the above response to your question.

Quote:
Originally Posted by an_aurora View Post
I can't think of a battle more worth picking
Agreed! The differences in safety we are talking about here aren't small and I am a Mama who wears her velcro babies, nurses on demand, cosleeps and in general does whatever I can to make sure my small people are not crying unnecessarily. I hate hearing my kids cry but after limiting car trips and making the ones we do take as pleasant for them as I can with them in their rearfacing seats I'd rather having a crying baby than a dead one when I could have prevented it easily.
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