My DS is 3 years and 3 months old... my newborn is 10 days old. At the hospital, we got him a gift from the newborn and told him how excited the baby was to have him as a big brother. We praised him for everything kind he did for his brother ect... we ask him to help/ gave him responsibility (can you get us a diaper for the baby ect...). My husband has been giving out DS a lot of play time but maybe only 70% of how much attention he used to get.
Anyway, MIL is down to help because I ended up having an emergency c-section and I've had nothing but complications. DS has been acting out, back talking, screaming and crying when he is told not to do something (he didn't do it as bad before baby came around).
The last two days things like "I want to kill him" or "let's kill him" and "I want to slap him" have come out of his mouth. I have no idea where he heard that language because he is allowed very minimal tv exposure. Sometimes he gets a disney or pixar movie on our weekly family nights but nothing that I can remember them saying things like that- he does go to a gym daycare with older kids.
Just today, about 20 min ago, DS decided to hit the baby in the head while MIL was holding him. MIL told him "no honey we need to be nice like this" and showed him how to gently pet him (which he has pet his head many times before with me holding him). What does DS do? He hits him 2 more times after being corrected and voices raised before MIL gets to her feet and away from DS. HIs dad then yelled at him for his behavior since talking and time outs aren't working. I don't know that yelling is the solution either but I don't know what to do...
Oh and he bit his father earlier this morning...
WHAT CAN I DO? How do you eliminate the jealousy and mean tendencies? He was such a loving and caring child before the baby was born. It is like he has done a 180 in behavior and I don't even recognize him this way
Anyway, MIL is down to help because I ended up having an emergency c-section and I've had nothing but complications. DS has been acting out, back talking, screaming and crying when he is told not to do something (he didn't do it as bad before baby came around).
The last two days things like "I want to kill him" or "let's kill him" and "I want to slap him" have come out of his mouth. I have no idea where he heard that language because he is allowed very minimal tv exposure. Sometimes he gets a disney or pixar movie on our weekly family nights but nothing that I can remember them saying things like that- he does go to a gym daycare with older kids.
Just today, about 20 min ago, DS decided to hit the baby in the head while MIL was holding him. MIL told him "no honey we need to be nice like this" and showed him how to gently pet him (which he has pet his head many times before with me holding him). What does DS do? He hits him 2 more times after being corrected and voices raised before MIL gets to her feet and away from DS. HIs dad then yelled at him for his behavior since talking and time outs aren't working. I don't know that yelling is the solution either but I don't know what to do...
Oh and he bit his father earlier this morning...
WHAT CAN I DO? How do you eliminate the jealousy and mean tendencies? He was such a loving and caring child before the baby was born. It is like he has done a 180 in behavior and I don't even recognize him this way
I was in your position 5 months ago although my 3 year old was fine with the baby, just horrible with me. He did anything he could to get my attention when I was nursing. I also had an emergency c section. All I can say is, it DOES get better. You just have to get through it. Get as much help as you can. Let him watch TV, eat junk, whatever, just to get through the day. You will have to break the habit later but at the moment you are in survival mode.
