weekend rhythm

[mommariffic]

During the week I'm the "main parent" so our rhythm is what I decide and what DD/DS need [I'm working on a new rhythm for fall to balance infant & 3 year old needs and I'm psyched!]

Anyway, one thing I struggle with is a weekend rhythm. DH is present/not working, but he often wants to just veg with the television on and I really don't WANT DD to be sitting in front of it with him. We do family activities and see other family Sunday's, but other than that we have no rhythm. The kids want Daddy-time and it's just wacky and hard for me mostly

So what is your "weekend" routine, if any? Do you just let things get more relaxed on Saturday and Sunday? Do you have a special routine?

[LuxPerpetua]

For us, our weekends are actually busier because we have church and we do all of our errands since during the week I don't have a car. I keep our eating schedule pretty much the same, which helps ground us. On Saturdays, we have breakfast and then dd plays while dh and I shower, do odds and ends, have lunch, go out somewhere (park, pool, whatever), get ready for church, go to church, come home and get ready for bed. On Sundays, dh buys groceries after breakfast, we have lunch, and then we go out. It isn't always smooth for us either--sometimes I need to switch groceries to Saturday and that makes for a hectic day. If it is any consolation, weekends are a pain for us, too. Usually we do pretty well, but sometimes not so much. I just try and keep our eating and bedtime routines as close as possible because I'm not sure what else to do.

[Mom2Camryn397]

Same here. We try to keep a rhythm but i have also noticed that it really is ok to have a different rhythm when daddy is around and the kids seem to understand that. Things like meals are consistent but other activities are a bit more random. This weekend we are planning to go to the zoo which means lots of time in the car and naps on the go. We know they will be crazy that evening but we think it's worth it in this case. We do often stay close to home and maintains naps for them but i have found that results in us doing nothing, ot doing chores all day, and i just need to get out and enjoy the beautiful weather for the short time that we have it (Chicago). Now, I do agree that i would have a problem with my husband sitting in front of the tv all day though. Maybe you can compromise and "reserve" a time for him to tech tv while you care for the kids or during quiet time. Of course, that only really works if you have a DVR but still it's worth exploring. As much as my husband used to love the TV, he also lewrned to recognize that it's not necessarily a good thing to veg out for hours on end. Can you plan some fun activities with him and the kids? Dh took camryn to her swimming lessons every saturday morning and he really loved that time, he also handles her nap on weekends and takes her fishing every so often, among other things, while i care for the baby. These are all things he loves to do with her. You can also plan a movie night which we sometimes do on sundays and usually watch mary poppins, a favorite in our house and a really "waldorf-friendly" movie if there is such a thing

[Tashakittie]

so interesting to see this is on the brain for other waldorf-inspired, sahm mamas. i try to keep rhythm only in the sense of meals. dh is not a morning eater, me and the kids are. so we get up, read a couple books, and get busy w/ making and eating breakfast. if it were up to dh, he'd forget all about breakfast, and dawdle away b/c he's so thrilled to be able to chill at home. so, after breakfast we tend to go outside, tend to our garden, play some, get the dog out. eventually, lunch, maybe naps, and then we do whatever. dh is very inclined to having the tv on 100% of the time- its how he was raised, and he sees no problem w/ the kids doing the same. we can argue till eternity, but it is not something he'll compromise about. a blessing in having to cut back on our spending, we got rid of cable. i was over joyed, and he really is not affected by it at all. if i have music on, he forgets about putting on dvds, too. also, planning out activities i know he'll love is great too- beach, park, hanging w/ the family, going to home depot, planting something major... try diverting him, and grounding your rhythm with the things that need to get done; like meals. we are pretty laid back, and our rhythm even through the week needs some work- i just have huge issues being too rigid. hth!!!

[crowcaw]

We have a pretty structured weekend -- we have the same Sat and Sun breakfast every week, Sat mornings are mellow long walk with the dog, putter about the house, garden, Sat is smorgasbord lunch (clean out the leftovers from the week), Sat afternoon is an outing -- bike riding, beach, zoo, museum,... -- but only a couple hours. Dh cooks dinner Sat. Sun morning is real cleaning day -- as opposed to my just keeping the house livable through the week -- where dh and I clean after breakfast and girls "help" or otherwise entertain themselves. Sun afternoon/dinner is at the grandparents. It's not always always like that, but mostly like that. There are some weekends where dh or I feel like we need some time for ourselves and go off and do something on our own Sat afternoon, but then the other takes dds on an outing. And of course there are the birthday parties or other events that make it so that we have a little variety. Luckily dh and I are on the same page about tv, so it doesn't come on on weekends either.

It's not like we were trying to set a routine though. It kind of just developed and seems to be working to make relaxing weekends for now. Without the routine dh in particular was always a little stressed about "so what are we going to do now?" He's not a good hanger-outer and would sit in front of the computer or be glued to his blackberry all day if we didn't have a routine.

[zoebird]

our weekend rhythm looks like this:

rise, make bed, toilet, make breakfast, clean up after breakfast

skype with family for about 1-2 hrs (DS will typically go back and forth between skype and free playing on his own. he also likes to give performances on his various instruments throughout the conversations).

get cleaned up and dressed for that day (if we are not going out anywhere, we stay in PJs and have a "pyjama day")

once dressed, do our tidy time before setting up for the next activity

prep to go out and do what we were going to do (eg, pack a change for the kiddo, pack a lunch and snack, and gather shopping bags if that's our errand, or whatever else--such as packing food to share if we are going to a party, etc)

wrap the kid and head out for our activity--this also usually includes time for DS to play either at a playground or at an open space

head home for dinner time, have dinner, clean up after dinner

DS has his bath, then toilet, then PJs, then snuggles down to bed.

DH and I hang out and read, watch a movie, or hang out online.

some weekends, I work, so DH does this rhythm pretty much on his own. because we talk to my family on Sat Am instead of Mon am as before, i will likely work on sunday instead of saturday morning, and DH can manage the rhythm with his family on skype. i'll typically return home by 12 or 2, which is when we are ready to go out for the afternoon.

we find it helpful to have concerted, planned "PJ" days, but since we don't have TV, it's never a TV day. we find it really relaxing to have a day where we can just hang out, read books, be on the internet, do some art work, and do some cooking and talking and just laying around. DS even enjoys it--he loves to cuddle and be read to, he plays on his own, etc etc. so, it works out nicely. It's also a day that he sleeps a fair bit, for reasons we don't really know since he gets plenty of sleep, but nevertheless, there it is. it's like his catch-up day.

And as for now, our new rhythm during the week is as follows:

M: waldorf crafting group am (ds and me); writing (DH); 4 hrs of work for me in the afternoons
T: dusting/vacuuming and fermenting day, ordering food, i go into work early (my long day from 11-7), 4 hrs of work for me in the afternoons
W: Bathroom, DH writing morning outside of the house; 4 hrs of work for me in the afternoons
R: waldorf play group (ds and me); writing DH, 4 hrs of work for me in the afternoons
F: kitchen, DH writing morning outside of the house, 4 hrs of work for me in the afternoons
Sa: skype my family
Su: skype ILs

so, that's our current process.

[organic.mama]

crowcaw - Our weekends sound identical to yours! That is exactly waht I was going to post. On days that we are out of our rhythm (usually for family events) DH is always asking "whats the plan now...I need to figure out our day". For the most part everything revolves around sleeping and eating at the same time every day. Our Sunday mornings are typically spent at the farmers market, then home for lunch & nap time, and DH and I spend the rest of our afternoon alternating between the kids and major house work.

About the television... DH and I decided when I first got pregnant that we did not want to kids exposed to TV, we didn't even want it on in the background when they are not "actively watching" so we moved the TV into our bedroom. DS is 19 months now and we just talked about how we have no real need for television, so we sold it and bought a new set of blocks! (totally of topic, but we also ditched our microwave and I am so proud of myself for it!!)