Awkward things your kids say to others - Page 4

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by KaylaBeanie

Well, not my kid (the 6 year old I nanny for), but it's classic...

G: I saw the weirdest video on youtube! It was a lady with huge boobies squirting milk in a man's mouth!

(his mom interjects, saying "Oh honey I'm sure she was just feeding her baby," trying to make the situation somehow less awkward)

G: NO MOM! It was a BIG man, not a baby!

At which point mom turns to you and says, "well then, G's not allowed to play on the computer alone any more." and you say "yep, got it."

[loraxc]

DD, to supermarket checker: Why is your hair that color?
Supermarket checker: That's just the way God made it!
DD (very matter-of-fact): There is no God.

(We are agnostic/atheist, but have explained religion and God very nonjudgmentally and open-mindedly, I swear. DD apparently reached her own conclusion, though.)

[annettemarie]

Originally Posted by loraxc

DD, to supermarket checker: Why is your hair that color?
Supermarket checker: That's just the way God made it!
DD (very matter-of-fact): There is no God.

(We are agnostic/atheist, but have explained religion and God very nonjudgmentally and open-mindedly, I swear. DD apparently reached her own conclusion, though.)

Oh my gosh, I would probably die laughing.

[tarajean56]

I have a few:

DD (2) saw DH peeing, and she said, "Daddy, your penis has a hat on it!"

After I had trimmed up down below a little bit, DS (3) said in a public restroom, "Mom! Why did you give your butt a hair cut?!"

We went out to lunch with some of our friends, who have young children about the same age as ours. DS went into a whole discussion with his little friend (loudy) about why she should choose white milk instead of the chocolate milk she had, and that it is not healthy for her to drink it. He even went into how eating too much sugar will "suppress her immune system." All through lunch he was so concerned that she was chugging down the chocolate milk, and he kept talking about it to all of us. Akward! We aren't even super-strict about food either!

[nainai0585]

Originally Posted by loraxc

DD, to supermarket checker: Why is your hair that color?
Supermarket checker: That's just the way God made it!
DD (very matter-of-fact): There is no God.

(We are agnostic/atheist, but have explained religion and God very nonjudgmentally and open-mindedly, I swear. DD apparently reached her own conclusion, though.)

that just made my day. Man to be a fly on the wall to see the cashier's expression

[BunnySlippers]

Originally Posted by tarajean56

After I had trimmed up down below a little bit, DS (3) said in a public restroom, "Mom! Why did you give your butt a hair cut?!"
!

After walking in on me trimming with scissors (in my private bathroom), dd says all sincerely and worried "mama, do you hate your vulva?"

I think public bathroom embarassments are the best! Little kids are so open about thier thoughts.

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by tarajean56

I have a few:

DD (2) saw DH peeing, and she said, "Daddy, your penis has a hat on it!"

After I had trimmed up down below a little bit, DS (3) said in a public restroom, "Mom! Why did you give your butt a hair cut?!"

We went out to lunch with some of our friends, who have young children about the same age as ours. DS went into a whole discussion with his little friend (loudy) about why she should choose white milk instead of the chocolate milk she had, and that it is not healthy for her to drink it. He even went into how eating too much sugar will "suppress her immune system." All through lunch he was so concerned that she was chugging down the chocolate milk, and he kept talking about it to all of us. Akward! We aren't even super-strict about food either!

? I'm not clear if he continued even though you talked to him about it or if you didn't try to stop him.

[KaylaBeanie]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

At which point mom turns to you and says, "well then, G's not allowed to play on the computer alone any more." and you say "yep, got it."

Haha, I wasn't watching him when he saw the video, it was the weekend and his mom was in the bathroom getting ready and he somehow wandered away from Justin Beiber. I stick with funny animal videos if we do any youtube.

I just have to add, I reread these all and I'm loving most of them in that painfully awkward yet funny way

[Bluegoat]

Originally Posted by Maiasaura

You know, though-- I knew someone once, a white American person who was married to, and had children with, a person from central America. They'd lived down there for some time before moving back to the US. I was told that Hispanic people are white, that "Hispanic" is not a race. I was pretty sure it wasn't a race, but maybe there is someone here who can clarify that and tell me if that's correct or not?
Aren't Hispanic peoples' origins in white people mixing with native (central) American peoples? Hmmm...

The idea of race is to some extent man made, but the term Hispanic does not actually refer to a race at all. A Hispanic person could be Caucasian, or Black, or Native American, or Asian, or any combination. Usually the term Hispanic means from a Spanish speaking nation, and in South America, there are lots of different racial and ethnic groups who are Hispanic culturally. You could, for example, find a Jewish, white person from Brazil who would be Hispanic.

That being said, people use the term in a lot of ways that aren't technically correct, so you have to figure out what people mean sometimes.

[ihugtrees]

Originally Posted by loraxc

DD, to supermarket checker: Why is your hair that color?
Supermarket checker: That's just the way God made it!
DD (very matter-of-fact): There is no God.

(We are agnostic/atheist, but have explained religion and God very nonjudgmentally and open-mindedly, I swear. DD apparently reached her own conclusion, though.)

ROFL!!!!

My 15 month old is talking a LOT but most people don't understand her words yet. I'm slightly embarrassed by the way she tells everyone no, wagging her finger in their face like they are naughty. I think my DH did that to her 2 or 3 times, jokingly, but I feel like people must think we are awful to her! Also, when she drops things or bumps her head or something, she'll say, "Ohhhhh, sh*t. Ohhhhhh, noes." or "Uh oh, ohhh sh*t..." At least she says a lot of 'please' & 'thank you's to make up for the potty mouth!

[kimmypoo]

We were at a friend's house and my 2 yo picked up her toy phone the other day and pretended to be daddy talking to his friend:
"Hi Steven"
"Doing Steven?" (as in what are you doing?)
"Oh bullsh*t"
Thanks for teaching her that, DH.

[blizzard_babe]

DS (2 y/o) said to a visiting friend the other day...

"I want to play with my penis. Gonna go in my bedroom."

We've been working on him not just whipping it out and playing with it. Guess the next step is working on not announcing to friends that he's GOING to whip it out and play with it.

Friend thought it was pretty great, though. "I'm glad that you're not like yelling at him for playing with it." So... .

[Juvysen]

Originally Posted by blizzard_babe

DS (2 y/o) said to a visiting friend the other day...

"I want to play with my penis. Gonna go in my bedroom."

We've been working on him not just whipping it out and playing with it. Guess the next step is working on not announcing to friends that he's GOING to whip it out and play with it.

Friend thought it was pretty great, though. "I'm glad that you're not like yelling at him for playing with it." So... .

We had our family reunion a couple weeks ago. Obviously, tons of people, lots of stuff going on... well, at one point I hear DD upstairs screaming HYSTERICALLY. I rushed up, of course, expecting something horrible to have happened. Well, turns out she had been on the potty and had pooped, and had been calling for Dh or I to come and wipe her bottom for who knows how long. Of course with all the festivities we hadn't heard her, and she hadn't told us she was going. So I had to have a long discussion about how she either needs to warn us she's going when there's lots of stuff going on, so we know to listen for her/check on her, or she needs to suck it up and wipe herself (she says she's too worried about not doing a good job ). Anyway, so now, pretty much *ANYTIME* there's a group of us, DD comes in to the middle of the group and announces "I have to go POO POO!" to fits of laughter from the adults. How is it that they always have the worst timing on bowel movements, anyway?

[Maiasaura]

Originally Posted by Bluegoat

The idea of race is to some extent man made, but the term Hispanic does not actually refer to a race at all. A Hispanic person could be Caucasian, or Black, or Native American, or Asian, or any combination. Usually the term Hispanic means from a Spanish speaking nation, and in South America, there are lots of different racial and ethnic groups who are Hispanic culturally. You could, for example, find a Jewish, white person from Brazil who would be Hispanic.

That being said, people use the term in a lot of ways that aren't technically correct, so you have to figure out what people mean sometimes.

Well, I know what you mean. That makes sense. But I guess I'm confused because on all applications (like, for employment) in the section where it says "race", Hispanic is one of the choices. If it's not a race, why is it a race? Kwim?

Tried to mulit-quote but that button wasn't working

[eepster]

Originally Posted by Maiasaura

Well, I know what you mean. That makes sense. But I guess I'm confused because on all applications (like, for employment) in the section where it says "race", Hispanic is one of the choices. If it's not a race, why is it a race? Kwim?

On a employment/school/etc application, they just want to keep a record of whether or not there is a pattern of discrimination, so they just need to know if the applicant belongs a group that might be a target of discrimination. It's easier and less confusing to put "race" on the application than to put "traditionally marginalized groups."

[Maiasaura]

Originally Posted by eepster

It's easier and less confusing to put "race" on the application than to put "traditionally marginalized groups."

Sorry, that just struck me funny

[VBMama]

Originally Posted by aprons_and_acorns

When DS was three/four this happened at the dentist:

Dentist (taking off the full-length bib and helping DS out of the chair): Well, you did such a great job of letting me look at your teeth.

Hygenist: Yes, he sat so nicely for me too and opened so wide. I wish all kids were as good at this as you are.

DS: Oh, well, knowing that I had to sit still I was just playing with my penis the whole time.

OMG. That is the.funniest.thing I have read here in a long time. We must have similar ds's - I can totally see my oldest saying something like that at that age, right down to the earnest tone of sharing a good tip and getting hurt if we laughed. I snorted so hard from laughing I think I hurt my throat...

Hmm, my own most recent one was when dh & I were buying new phones. Dd announces she needs to go potty and I ask the young hip salesguy if they have a restroom. Nope. Okay, I head down to the next store to take care of her business and when we get back she is absolutely insistent on telling the salesguy that she pooped. I'm not sure if he was more embarrassed or I was.