6yo & 21mo... NOTHING GETS DONE!

[heatherdeg]

Oy... SOMEone must have answers for me. Mods--this is specific to homeschooling objectives which is why I posted here, but I'm likely to X-post in parenting.

So, we don't do a ton of academics, but my son IS interested in math and actually enjoys the Saxon lessons. And they're short, but we go through 3 in a sitting... Plus, he reads way ahead of his age (4th grade) but to ensure he's slowing down enough for comprehension, we need to do a lot of reading together. And then there's trips out of the house--which are a NIGHTMARE. My dd won't sit in a stroller, won't tolerate a backback carrier and doesn't nap. When she does nap, it's for 30 minutes total and usually in the car.

How on earth am I supposed to get anything done with and for my son? He's really starting to feel it now and I feel awful for him. We just relocated halfway across the country, not that I had any family or anything to help back home. But it's getting to the point where dh has suggested daycare 3 days/week for dd so that ds gets the time he needs with me. Especially since it's been a REALLY rough year and we're in "healing" mode--and ds is clearly the most affected by all of it.

I don't know what to do. What do you guys do? What do you suggest?

[rockportmama]

!

This won't help, but we do our schoolwork during the baby's nap. She's 20 months, but she naps for longer than 1/2 an hour and does it at home. Granted, I have to nurse her down, but it's well worth the time.

So, solutions for when to do schoolwork. Hm. Perhaps she could go to bed before him and do your lessons then? Maybe hubby could give her a bath and you and DS could sneak in a lesson? Maybe lessons could happen on weekends when hubby or neighbors could watch Baby? Just throwing out random ideas to help you brainstorm something that could work for y'all.

As for leaving the house, I have no idea. We're currently a one car family. You could invite people over, but you have to have a way to meet them, first. Could you find a church (Unitarians welcome people of all beliefs!)? Are there any homeschool groups around you? Would hubby stay home with Baby a few hours on the weekend so you and DS could hit the library/museum/park? Then get numbers of moms whose kids your DS gets along with!

What time of day will DD sleep in the car? Does it need to be moving? Could you do a half-hour roadschooling parked in the driveway?

Are there any neighbors who could help? Teenage girls who could come play with Baby in the living room while you and DS do school in the kitchen?

And when all else fails, I have been known to put Baby Girl in front of a video to give DS the time he needs with me.

Good luck & let us know what you come up with!
-rockport-

[yllek]

I truly, truly feel for you. I am so btdt. My little one is turning 3 this month, but this past year, any attempt to hs ds5 was met with utter chaos and destruction.

Some things that helped me:

A wading pool. Under the wading pool, I would lay out a large sheet. In the wading pool, there would be a special bin full of beans. I would hide special little toys and goodies in the beans. Yes, there would be a mess. I learned that the five minutes of cleanup would often buy me about twenty distraction-free minutes to homeschool.


The bathtub or sink. Keep special toys, bubbles, bath paints, etc. reserved for homeschool time.

Outside homeschool. Dd2 could run around while ds and I did a bit of hs.

Starting any kind of "lesson" with a special "lesson" just for dd. Often, her worst behavior stemmed from just wanting to be included in what must seem a like special time between ds and me. So, I learned to start many lessons with songs and dancing, a special story for her, playdough/sensory time, etc. and to direct most of my attention to her, while making clear that everyone was doing "homeschool" at this time.

[briansmama]

Originally Posted by heatherdeg

Oy... SOMEone must have answers for me. Mods--this is specific to homeschooling objectives which is why I posted here, but I'm likely to X-post in parenting.

So, we don't do a ton of academics, but my son IS interested in math and actually enjoys the Saxon lessons. And they're short, but we go through 3 in a sitting... Plus, he reads way ahead of his age (4th grade) but to ensure he's slowing down enough for comprehension, we need to do a lot of reading together. And then there's trips out of the house--which are a NIGHTMARE. My dd won't sit in a stroller, won't tolerate a backback carrier and doesn't nap. When she does nap, it's for 30 minutes total and usually in the car.

How on earth am I supposed to get anything done with and for my son? He's really starting to feel it now and I feel awful for him. We just relocated halfway across the country, not that I had any family or anything to help back home. But it's getting to the point where dh has suggested daycare 3 days/week for dd so that ds gets the time he needs with me. Especially since it's been a REALLY rough year and we're in "healing" mode--and ds is clearly the most affected by all of it.

I don't know what to do. What do you guys do? What do you suggest?

Try to remember that this phase will pass- toddlerhood is exhausting and difficult, and probably your needs are not being met so I'm sure it's hard to feel like you're meeting your ds needs as well.

I also wanted to point out that after a rough year, healing at home with you is probably the best place on earth for your ds right now, even if you find you're struggling to meet all of his needs. He is likely getting so much out of simply being with you and healing more that he could in a large, busy classroom.

I'd suggest unschooling this year and/or being very gentle on yourself.

HTH!

[zjande]

I homeschool my son who's going into 7th grade, plus I have a 4 yr old pre-Ker, a 2.5 yr old and a 9 month old. I think you've gotten great advice so far on ways to entertain little sister for awhile so you can focus on your ds. Does your dd enjoy being carried around? Like, can you just wander back & forth across the room with her on your hip while your ds reads aloud to you or while you read to him? I do that sometimes. Often, I just homeschool my oldest over the dull roar of my youngers. I've also done some schooling with my 7th grader while sitting in the bathroom while the youngers are in the tub. Most of the time though, I just find something fun for the 2 & 4 yr olds to do, as others have mentioned, hold the baby, & school with my oldest son in spurts. My 2 & 4 yos love crafts especially. I can set them up with paints & get a good 20-30mins in with my ds sometimes.

It will get easier as time goes by. Your ds will slowly be able to do his schoolwork more independently, & your dd will become more & more interested in sit-down schooly things herself.

Personally I wouldn't put my dd in day care if I were you. You're lucky to get to be home with your kids, & they are lucky to get to be with mom. I think your dd would be happiest at home with mama. Perhaps your dh is suggesting that because he's reacting to your voicing your frustrations? Maybe he's just trying to be helpful, come up with a solution? I find my dh does that. As a woman, sometimes I just talk a lot. And I need to "vent". My dh isn't a "venter", so when he hears me voicing a frustration he thinks I'm asking him to help me when more often than not, I'm just "venting" a frustration.

You can totally homeschool with littles underfoot! Just think, the Duggars have been doing it for 20some years! LOL