Do I have to stop co-sleeping??

[kdescalzi]

Mamas,

I have trudged along sleepily for 14 mos with dd sleeping on my boob and now I have decided that I have to stop this. My body is so sore, and I am physically,mentally, and emotionally exhausted. I finally got her to fall asleep at bedtime with daddy. That means no nursing, however, once she wakes she needs the nipple in her mouth. She continues to wake every 45mins-2hours needing to re-latch. I have noticed that she does not eat at night...there is never any swallowing or let downs. She simply needs to suck all night long. I need this to change. How can I stop this?? Everyone keeps telling me she has to get out of our bed! I do not want to kick her out into her own room yet. I love co-sleeping but I want to sleep beside her, not attatched to her. Is this even possible?

[Devaskyla]

I normally hate the things, but maybe a pacifier would help?

[kdescalzi]

She definately needs a paci but will not take one. I started trying different kinds at about 1mo old and continued until she was about 8mos old...no dice. I think that ship has unfortunately sailed.

[kdescalzi]

Anybody else have any tips or advice. I am getting sucked into some sort of sleep training by my family and friends. Please tell me there is a way to keep sleeping with my babe!!

[onyxravnos]

did you try slipping in the paci while she was already asleep?

also sometimes my 3yr old does this and i just pull away - he wakes up and crys for nursing - i tell him 'just a minute i'm adjusting - he falls back to sleep while waiting for me to make my imaginary adjustments.

[lovepiggie]

Have you seen those pacifier buddies? It's a soft toy/blankie that you can attach your pacifier to..
http://www.lebabyshop.com/wubbanub-p...y-giraffe.html
Something like that! I think there are many other kinds...

Maybe if you were to snuggle with the toy yourself while your baby is nursing to sleep, then slip her the pacifier once he is asleep...She could then cuddle the toy, which is soft and warm and now smells like mama, and still get the sucking satisfaction from the pacifier!

[transylvania_mom]

I would definitely try to stop this habit. This is how my ds got his cavities. Our solution was him co-sleeping with dh for a while.

[titania8]

Have you tried the "pantley pull off" from the no cry sleep solution? She has a toddler/preschooler version of that book too. Yes, some consider it to be sleep training, but it sounds like you are ready for a change. Your library might have it.

I can't imagine a 14 starting to use a paci, seems entirely too old to be fooled by that! I hope you are able to get some relief.

[jojomamma]

There may be some reasons why your DS is having trouble sleeping for long stretches. I may not just be a bad habit. My son was having trouble sleeping between 6 and 10 mos. But he used to sleep better so I started trying to figure out what was going on. Here is what I learned…

Some women’s milk is fattier than others and therefore might be more satisfying for longer stretches of sleep. I decided this was part of our problem because when I pumped and the milk settled, there is only a think line of fat on top and the rest was very clear. Do you have a pump to see how much hind milk you produce? I corrected this by increased calories and fat in my diet. I now make sure I eat egg yolks, butter, olive oil, and cod liver oil often and I use only whole milk dairy. Homemade chicken stock also does wonders for enriching my milk supply and it is so easy. The fat content in my milk is now much higher. BF’ing moms cannot eat a low fat diet. Infants need fat and cholesterol for proper brain development and will keep trying to nurse if they are not getting enough. I am so glad I figured this out now.

I also know that mineral deficiencies can lead to sleep problems especially when babies are teething. If minerals are deficient it can cause a lot of night waking. I started giving my son the homeopathic Calc. Phos.(this is in the Hyland’s teething tablets too). You can buy this for only $7 or $8. Native Remedies has a more expensive homeopathic combo that will probably work too, but I haven’t tried it. Within two days of giving him the Calc. Phos., my son was sleeping four hour stretches at night and only getting up once or twice. So now I am concentrating on improving my mineral intake and he has been sleeping great for the past two months.

The only other thing I changed was to make sure that I nurse him on both sides when he wakes up at night so he gets filled up again. If I let him fall back to sleep after only one side, he will “snack” all night and wake up every two hours. It’s worth the extra 5 or 10 minutes to sit up and feed him well and then we lie down and continue to nurse lying down until he falls asleep. And sometimes he will just roll away from me and fall asleep on his own now.

I hope some of this works for you too!

[Katie T]

I totally understand how you are feeling! I have a little one who is just over 2yo and she thinks she has to be attached to the breast the whole night as well. What I do and am successful some times and not others is to let her nurse till she is back asleep and then pull the nipple out of her mouth as I carefully roll away. Sometimes she wakes and I have to try again when she nurses back to sleep and sometimes she will fuss for a second and go back to sleep. Learning this saved my sanity though!

She also just nurses for comfort, she will swallow at times but it is often just a binkie suck that she is doing. She also was one to refuse the paci and although she did take her thumb for 14 months or so self weaned off of it.

Good luck, I hope you find something that works so you don't have to stop cosleeping.