Frugal & Meaningful Holiday Challenge?

[proudmamanow]

Hi all!
We will be celebrating Christmas at our home again this year (in the past we have often travelled a looooong way to see family). I am thrilled
but also a bit stressed....last year's Christmas at Home cost us somewhere in the neighbourhood of $1500.

I really really really really want to do Christmas differently this year: more simple, more frugal, more meaningful. I want to teach my girls that it is about more than just getting gifts, but also about giving to others, sharing and spending special time with people we love. I want to build some new traditions for our little family.

My ideas so far:

-An advent calendar where we do one special thing together each day, rather than giving candies, stickers, dollar store toys as we have done in the past.

-One special family gift rather than lots of expensive items for everyone.

-Making cookies & taking them around to all our neighbours (this is becoming a tradition for us).

-volunteering at a special Gingerbread House fundraiser for my favourite local charity that provides free doula services to new moms in need.


But I would like lots more ideas! And I could really really use some support.

Challenges for me:
-Not spending tons of $$$$$$ on expensive fancy food and justifying it because it's the holidays
-Not blowing our budget because I am anxious the girls won't have enough to open on Christmas morning. I have a very bad history of doing this...it's like there's some script in my head that starts up and says 'you must buy! buy! buy! or you are a bad parent!'



I know, I know it's only August and some of you are thinking I'm crazy But I LOVE the Holidays and I want them to be frugally meaningfully fantastic, so I figure planning early is a good thing!

Anyone want to join me? (or maybe I should start this thread in October, lol!)

[confustication]

Oh, I will absolutely join in!

I'm actually getting pretty good at this, though I want to plan more in advance this year.

I love Christmas at home, and I think we're going to do a 'real' tree this year. Of course, to do that- I think we're going to go cut one down. Yay- tree and day trip all in one for a $5 permit from the BLM. Top with hot cocoa and cookies and that sounds like a perfect holiday kickoff to me!

Meals- I *do* get 'special' food for the holidays, but it's not awful in terms of expense. A turkey goes a LONG way when you use the leftovers wisely- same with a ham or roast beef. We try to do those things over the holidays, and use the leftovers in dishes throughout the surrounding weeks (we have a big chest freezer for storage.)

Gifts- I try to do one 'big' homemade gift for each child. All three are getting Waldorf-style dolls this year... I need to start sewing soon. The boys will probably get some more blocks and maybe a play kitchen this year- all homemade. My oldest will take more consideration as she'll be nine and the leap from little kid to big kid is hard!

[tinybutterfly]

I LOVED this book! I didn't put everything in it into practice, but used it as a loose guide. I've been working on making our holidays less cluttered and stressful for several years now.

http://www.billmckibben.com/hundred-dollar-holiday.html

One thing my kids really enjoy, even as old as they are, is a family night with fun board games during the holiday season. Add whatever fun food you all like ( popcorn and hot chocolate, pizza, Chinese takeout, eggnog and cookies...) and it's a party.

Last year we did a combo of the three gifts like the Three Wisemen and the Victorian Christmas thing...Something you want, something you need, something to wear, something to read...

I think I left out the something to wear.

It worked out really well.

I still get special food, but have pared ( tried to anyway) the menu way down. Less stress for sure. I don't do a turkey AND a ham anymore.

Good luck.

I am going to sub and see what ideas everyone else has.

[ChristyMarie]

Wow, that does seem like a lot to spend.

Can you concentrate on experiences more than things? Can you add in volunteer work or other charity donations?

We do minimal gifts and sponsor families. The shopping for the families has become our best tradition.

[delightedbutterfly]

We do Christmas at home. In fact we throw a huge party Christmas eve which is supposed to be potluck style but I make more than enough food anyways and the what others bring is bonus. And we end up getting A LOT of people who come between 5 and 11 ish. I try and make the cheap easy foods (dips and salads) and when guests ask what they can bring I ask for their "special" meat/seafood/dessert dishes. I can usually get the potluck food and Christmas dinner food for around $150 in a very high cost of living area.

And as for gifts I try and keep the gifts to family members around $20. I might spend a bit more or less (I am a deal shopper) but my goal is $20 each.

My husband I usually spend $150ish and him the same on me. Both our DD's only get 4 gifts and a stocking from us. And of those four gifts one is from Santa. Between the two it is usually about $150.

And the four gifts are as follows "Something they WANT, something they NEED, something to WEAR and something to READ." (although sometimes I will replace WEAR with PLAY WITH depending on the year.)

So I spend between 600-800 total and try and keep it LOW cost and low stress.

Christmas day is JUST us at home. Our families kick up a stink as does my husband. But he always comments after how happy he is that we stayed at home and took the day slow (we used to cram three Christmas' into the one day) and family will either bring/send their gifts early or we have a family "open house" on boxing day. We eat the potluck leftovers and the family that wants to see the girls open gifts bring them then. And it spreads out the gifts and overwhelmingness...
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[Ruthiegirl]

I love our Christmases! We spend lots of time at home, with family, with our friends. We do spend a good deal of money, but this is the time of year I restock a lot of things we have been living without. So, new clothes, books, homeschooling supplies, art supplies, etc.



What really helps keep things mellow for us....


We try not to travel too much -- we see the local dance studio's production of The Nutcracker (so sweet and the whole cast is local kids), we go to our local town's holiday parade, we walk around the neighborhood to see everyone's lights...love it all and we spend a lot less time on the road dealing with hectic traffic.


I limit sugar! We bake cookies once. No more.


We get new building toys -- Legos, Kinex, tinker toys...lovely toys that keep kids busy and content.


We get outside every day. Every. day. And we play hard, take walks, run and bike as long as possible, play in the snow if we are lucky enough to get some.


We have dry holidays. DH's brother is in recovery, so no wine, no beer. I was bummed the first year, but then realized that I felt soooooo much better at the holidays when I wasn't drinking. Not that I drink a lot, but you know how it goes...a few glasses of wine, a few too many cookies, some rich food ...it all adds up to feeling crummy. Also, much cheaper.


I get a lot of exercise during this time of year -- I run a lot, participate in a lot of spinning classes, do the local Jingle Bell run, we even show up for the Polar Bear Plunge. It really helps with the winter/holiday blues and shopping fever.


I am really looking forward to Christmas this year.

[ChristyMarie]

Originally Posted by Ruthiegirl

I limit sugar! We bake cookies once. No more.

Last year I let DS (3) make the cookies pretty much on his own.

Inedible cookies = much less sugar! I may have to do that again this year.

[IntuitiveJamie]

Ruthiegir- I love what you said about getting a lot of exercise during the holidays. I know that last year I was looking great and had lost some weight before the holidays and over a couple of months during, I gained it all back and it's been a struggle ever since. I don't think I have ever heard of someone say they exercise a lot or more during the holidays. I think that sounds like a perfect way to keep away holiday blues and weight. I'll keep that in mind. I think I typically fall into the rich foods and treats and alcohol rut of the holidays like many.

Sometimes it's just takes someone else to say the most simple thing and it's like the brightest lightbulb goes off. LOL

[Ruthiegirl]

I didn't really address the frugal aspect though. We live an extraordinarily frugal lifestyle. The holiday is our time to have a little extra. I am careful about how I spend my money -- we buy local, we buy supplies we really need, we buy clothing that we will wear throughout the year.

I budget $1000 for gifts, tree, postage for cards, extra food. For us, it has been a good amount to spend.

[Ruthiegirl]

Originally Posted by IntuitiveJamie

Ruthiegir- I love what you said about getting a lot of exercise during the holidays. I know that last year I was looking great and had lost some weight before the holidays and over a couple of months during, I gained it all back and it's been a struggle ever since. I don't think I have ever heard of someone say they exercise a lot or more during the holidays. I think that sounds like a perfect way to keep away holiday blues and weight. I'll keep that in mind. I think I typically fall into the rich foods and treats and alcohol rut of the holidays like many.

Sometimes it's just takes someone else to say the most simple thing and it's like the brightest lightbulb goes off. LOL

Yeah, weight is always the big motivator for me -- I really dislike starting the new year with extra weight. It feels lousy and I kick myself for having last year's cookies hanging around my middle -- feels like I am bringing old, bad habits into my shiny, brand-new year.

I started working more a few years ago and I thought I was being really selfish and self-important. Like it was all about me, me, me and I should have been doing more for others during the holiday season. But I do a lot for others all. the. time. Seriously, I feel like I work for others all year round and this is my one time to really spend some time doing what I want to do.

And really, there is nothing like a good hard sweat when I am feeling the winter chill deep in my bones. Perks me up, keeps me from getting too cranky.

[limette]

Have you read "Unplugging the Christmas Machine?" I love that book, it really helps narrow down your focus on the holidays.

[Pumpkin_Pie]

I am so trying to find ways to make Christmas meaningful, especially since I have no family to celebrate with other than DS. We have gone each year so far to cut down our tree with a good friend who is also a single mama and her son. We take turns taking pictures of each other playing in the snow, cutting down the tree and dragging it out of the tree lot. The pics always come out super cute, and it ends up taking all day to do it all and get it up inside the house.

This year, I want to do more decorating of our home. I have tons of Christmas lights that I want to string up everywhere. I also want to hunt for pine cones and acorns to make some more natural decorations to hang throughout our apartment too. I am vowing to have the computer on Pandora Christmas stations for all of December too. I tend to forget to play music so often, and I LOVE Christmas music.

As for gifts, I am going to try to not buy anything new for any of our gifts. I went through what I have so far and was extremely surprised to tally up that I have spent $50 on both of us so far. I get myself gifts throughout the year and wrap them up to put under the tree on Christmas morning so DS sees that Mama's get gifts too. There is noone to buy me gifts, so I do it myself and I always get exactly what I wish for!

I did buy a new purse on very cheap-o clearance, and I have also purchased a few crazy cheap photo gifts from ArtsCow, but other than that, all of the gifts are from yard sales, thrift stores, free piles or dumpster diving. I also have an easel that I bought at a yard sale two years ago for DS that has been sitting in the basement. I think that will be his "big" gift this year. He will be 4 next March, so I feel like he is the perfect age to come down to it all set up with paints and paper on Christmas morning. I can't wait!

All in all, I feel like I am nearly done with gifts for us and would really like to concentrate from now to Christmas on making a few hand made things. I really feel like I am doing extremely well so far, but will be watching this thread pretty closely to pick up some more ideas!

[CariOfOz]

Originally Posted by proudmamanow

Hi all!
We will be celebrating Christmas at our home again this year (in the past we have often travelled a looooong way to see family). I am thrilled
but also a bit stressed....last year's Christmas at Home cost us somewhere in the neighbourhood of $1500.

Um yeah.. I think we hit about that amount last year too.. it was insane

But I would like lots more ideas! And I could really really use some support.

Challenges for me:
-Not spending tons of $$$$$$ on expensive fancy food and justifying it because it's the holidays
-Not blowing our budget because I am anxious the girls won't have enough to open on Christmas morning. I have a very bad history of doing this...it's like there's some script in my head that starts up and says 'you must buy! buy! buy! or you are a bad parent!'


Anyone want to join me? (or maybe I should start this thread in October, lol!)

NO August is perfect Having a good plan in place is the way to go I think. I'm defininitely on board with ya YES to the bolded bit... that nailed us big last year, to the tune of about 400bucks extra spending

I'm aiming to halve what we spent last year... I'd go lower, but I've also added a teenager to the household (my 17yo son has moved to live with us for a year or two )

GIFTS: I've decided that everyone is getting a board game or card game, which will give us a lot of fun evenings to follow! Things like pictionary, monopoly junior, cluedo and such are such good fun. Then I think everyone will get a book, new jammies and one special gift of their own.

Plus stockings ... those were my momma's favourite part of christmas and I inherited her love of finding just the perfect bits to fill them with.

Activities: Christmas is a little different for us.. we live in the subtropics and that is HIGH summer So we might often head to our cousins for Christmas lunch and a swim in the pool with the family. I always said Christmas day would ALWAYS be at home with just us... but somehow this tradition has won me over!

Day after Christmas might just be an early morning trip to the beach complete with a picnic/bbq breakfast.

FOOD: We do the Christmas eve dinner at our house, it's not cheap, but the in laws usually go in with us. We have a seafood platter with prawns, lobster, crab and smoked salmon along with pasta/potato/green salads and rolls

We do not do a big roast meal, as it's hotter than hades! The children & I make dessert, which is usually a pavlova (I cheat & buy the shell premade and just whip the cream and do the fruit ourselves) and we bake cookies, but that's usually it for sweets.

Christmas breakfast is pancakes, and bacon cooked on the bbq with champagne (and sparkling grape juice for the kiddies).

Thanks for this OP, I'm going to start a little list now of gift ideas and such

[Callimom]

I love Christmas.

Some of the things we do:

We organize a craft sale with our homeschool friends that takes place in late November. The kids make their items and then sell and/or trade their home made goodies with each other. It's a chance for them to do their Christmas shopping in a way. I cover about 1/2 of the cost of their supplies and then they get $20 each from the profits of the sales for buying gifts. The rest of the money goes to charity and or buying gifts for children who might otherwise not get anything.

We have an elf who comes to our house for the month of December. He visits and brings the kids early Christmas presents - things like tickets to a play, craft supplies, a gingerbread house kit...all the things that might otherwise cost me money become a part of their Christmas gift. He also brings post cards and crazy letters about what is happening at the North Pole. It's actually an amazing thing how deeply attached my kids are to this idea.
It's also been great at facilitating certain traditions as well. Dugood (that's his name) comes back after Christmas to collect the Santa Sacks (fabric gift bags) and leave a new Christmas ornament for our tree next year.
He also comes and collects the toys the kids leave out to pass on to other kids.

We take part in a carrolling night - open house with our neighbours.

But probably our very favourite tradition is a solstice walk we do with good friends. We walk a favourite trail in the woods and then gather at a clearing for a story, shared snack, hot apple cider, and sparklers. And then we sing our way out of the woods playing bells.

We try to do handmade gifts for family and friends and for the kids. Santa brings the stocking and one "big" gift per kid plus a group gift.

hth
Karen

[Turquesa]

I am sooooo subbing! Thanks for starting this thread!

[lolar2]

When you talk about spending money on gifts, is that just for the immediate family or does it include extended family?

Also, does it include "gifts" that are things like a new toothbrush, that you have to get anyway but they go under the tree since it's December?

What kinds of fancy food do you tend to spend a lot on?

[holidaymama]

Thank you for starting this! I began one of these a couple of years ago and it is SO fun to see what everyone is doing to be festive but frugal!

I am so envious of those of you who get to spend Christmas in your homes. We are 1000 miles away from our families, so we have to drive that length every Christmas...one of these years, I am going to refuse to go and make them come here if they want to spend Christmas with us, but we have a wedding the weekend before Christmas this year up north, and my grandpa is 86, so we will be going again!

However, we do lots of fun things getting ready. Since my parents usually come here for Thanksgiving, we decorate the day after. Last year was our first year with a real tree and we will do that again...Lowes had them on sale for Black Friday, and it was the most fresh and BEAUTIFUL tree! It lasted until we left the week before Christmas and was still beautiful when we came home without being watered for two weeks!

I will be reading this carefully in an effort to save money. My BIL wants to start just doing gifts for the little ones, and I like that idea because between by two BIL and SIL, I probably spend close to $300.

My budget is usually $1000...high for some and low for others. It works for us, and we save for it. However, we still have to look for all the deals and budget, budget, budget!

We have elves as well. Cinnamon and Peppermint...they came last year and our two boys loved them. We will continue that tradition again this year.

[Amys1st]

Its August and I have already bought Xmas gifts for December! I start buying as early as June so I can spread the spending out and not have to pay it off in the New year. I saw something on Amazon that both dds would love but really its for dd2. It was on sale, but spendy so I bought it and had it shipped to dh's office this week. But will be paid off well before Labor Day!

DD1 wants an ipod. She is hitting that age where she still gets some little girl stuff, but is starting to move into big girl stuff if you get my point. She uses mine all the time. I will be on the watch for a cheap one on craigslist or a cousin etc wanting to upgrade. She already has an ipod alarm clock that is her boom box with my ipod so a smaller space one should work fine.

Both girls want to do a build a bear visit. I dont care for that, but a couple of giftcards from santa and something to do that week they are off school. Since its a gift they both want, it will be fun.

Plus they both are in to American Girls. I will start buying a few bits n pieces here and there starting in Sept. They both play it so its worth the extra money since it stay nice as well.

Add also, some clay, a few craft supplies to replace and a pair of pjs or two plus what my parents etc buy, they will have plenty.

DH and I normally exchange, not in our love language. We also opted out of buying for extended family years ago and more people followed as the years went on. We normally write a large check for a local charity plus sponsor two children dds' ages.

[caiesmommy]

I'm in! We have a VERY VERY low budget for the holidays. We usually do everyones gifts including the kids and charity for less then 400 dollars and thats a good year

We buy all extended family and friends gifts(prob 40 people) but mostly the gifts are homemade preserves from our garden, things I knit, sew, and things ds(almost 4) makes.

This year I've started stockpiling and shopping already. I got dh's cousins 2 kids art sets one of cars and one of littlest pet shop for 3 bucks a piece. I usually spend 10 bucks between them. So I've saved 4 bucks already. I'll sew a nice reusuable tote with some fabric I have and they are done!

I'm REALLY lucky b/c FIL was a woodshop teacher! YAY! Last year santa brought ds a wooden tool box full of wooden tools, a tape measure and a paintbrush and dd a push duck that head bobs. Then I rounded it out with 10 bucks worth of art supplies for ds and a $5 cellphione for dd...SANTA SPENT 15 bucks last year

[Tradd]

I'm single, so obviously what I spend is a bit different, but here are some things I do/ideas I've gotten from friends:

I'm Orthodox and our Christmas Fast (Advent) begins Nov. 15th. I try to get as much done before then as possible, which is usually gift buying for my 5 yo goddaughter, her 2 younger sibs, a gift for their parents, and small gifts for another friend or two. For my goddaughter and her sibs, I get St. Nicholas Day (Dec. 6th) gifts, as well as for Christmas. I try to keep the kid gifts to things like books or good kiddie music (Sandra Boynton) and once a DVD. For the kids' parents, I will get a bag of good coffee or a small ($10) Starbucks gift card for a date night (they LOVE Starbucks!). I also try to get my cards addressed and such (just awaiting Christmas stamps) before the fast begins.

I do some banana bread (small loaves) as gifts. I find lots of people don't have time to bake, and also, if they don't like the bread themselves, they can always serve it to guests, etc. I plan to make a bit more this year than I did last year. This works good as a gift to those in my department (only 5 others).

Other than that, I focus on the spiritual aspect of the holiday season. You can do whatever fits in with your spiritual path. I have a devotional I use though the Christmas fast, go to special services, etc.

I also like to focus on giving to others. I will give through the Holiday Helper here on MDC. Last year, I was one of the volunteers, but I don't have any extra time to do it this year. I give extra to our local food pantry, and also coordinate a toy drive at my parish (through a regional denominational group) for kids in foster care.

Friends will take their kids who are old enough to understand (maybe 4 & up?) grocery shopping with them for the food pantry or a Christmas food basket, or for a gift through an angel tree.

Even with it being just me, I've found it's nice having certain dates to do things. Like Christmas music comes out the day after T'giving, or I decorate on St. Nicholas Day (Dec. 6), bake the weekend before Christmas (depending on which day of the week Christmas is), that sort of thing.

Things like driving around a bit (usually just diverting a bit from a usual route) looking at lights, or going to a holiday music concert, etc., are frugal things to do.