New to Homeschooling-Q's??

[joliebebe]

Hey,
Im new to this area of mothering, I spend time mostly in the parenting and nutrition forums :-)
We have three lovely boys, the eldest is nearly 5.

I have a few questions that I hope some of you knowledgeable homeschooling mamas might be able to share advice on.

I have read alot about delaying structured formal lessons until age 8-10 when the child has developed logical, consequential thinking, and that this is especially beneficial for boys. Anyone with boys who has done this, or any advice in general on homeschooling boys?

Also Im trying to get a picture of what life overall with homeschooling children is like... is your house always messy? are there days when you are not in the mood and want to stay in bed, what do you do at times like that? how does preparing healthy meals fit in-do the kids help? how much time is actually spent 'schooling' or is everything you do considered learning-like counting out cups of flour while cooking or recognising letters and numbers while out and about etc?

My husband also has concerns that I will burn out being around the children 24/7. How do you all manage to have a little time for yourself but also stay present for your children?

Also speaking of husbands, mine has several sceptical concerns-anyone else deal with a sceptic husband and how did you turn him around?

[cappuccinosmom]

I have three boys. We have not really delayed formal instruction (my oldest two started with a curric. at 5).

However, I don't do a full school day and we don't do a lot of sit-down work. The kindergarten curric we use (Calvert), we can easily finish up one lesson per day with about 15 minutes on bookwork. Stories can be read at other times, arts, games and music activities can be spread through the day or done in an alternative way. And if a kid wants to do his reading hanging upside down from the chair, I let him.

I would say everything we do is considered schooling. We live with my highly-intellectual family, so that helps. They're getting a great literary education as my dad reads classics to them every evening. We make regular trips to the zoo. We learn about seed germination and plant growth both by reading and by planting little gardens. I use their lesson themes and build onto them with conversations and sometimes field trips.

Overall, the time spent at the kitchen table doing work can be up to 3 hours but usually is less. Ds who is 7 will be starting online classes this fall which will be 3.5 hours every day. My house is tidy because clutter gives me serious anxiety, so tidying is a priority, and the kids are expected to help. We eat very simply, and I haven't had a problem fitting cooking in. The children play independently in the afternoon, and I can keep one ear open and supervise while throwing a few pots of food on the stove. They have a daily rest time that's about an hour, and that is when I do stuff for me (mainly exercise). Some days I need that rest time more than they do. Some days I'm a good mom, some days not so much.

Sceptic husbands: My husband was convinced when he met a university professor and a highschool teacher who had chosen to homeschool their kids. He figured if highly intelligent and well-educated people saw something in homeschooling, there must be something to it. I also pointed out that institutional schools would resist our oldest moving ahead academically, because while he can do the work, his maturity isn't advanced and he'd *never* test at the kind of level they'd want to see for grade skipping.

[mom2ponygirl]

Originally Posted by joliebebe

I have read alot about delaying structured formal lessons until age 8-10 when the child has developed logical, consequential thinking, and that this is especially beneficial for boys. Anyone with boys who has done this, or any advice in general on homeschooling boys?

Sorry, I only have girl experience. However, I think rather than have a set age in mind, it may be better to just let your child let you know when they are ready. A combination of exploring their interests and introducing topics and skills you think they are interested in will steer you in the right direction. If they aren't ready for what you introduce, no biggie - just set it aside and you can try again later. I think tons can be learned with little kids by playing games, living life, and reading.

Originally Posted by joliebebe

Also Im trying to get a picture of what life overall with homeschooling children is like... is your house always messy? are there days when you are not in the mood and want to stay in bed, what do you do at times like that? how does preparing healthy meals fit in-do the kids help? how much time is actually spent 'schooling' or is everything you do considered learning-like counting out cups of flour while cooking or recognising letters and numbers while out and about etc?

Everyone's homeschooling looks different. With little kids - yes your house will be messy! I think it is a great idea to have kids help with healthy meals whether you homeschool or not. Some days you won't be in the mood and you set up playdates for the kids and chat with a friend, or you go to the park and play, etc.

Originally Posted by joliebebe

My husband also has concerns that I will burn out being around the children 24/7. How do you all manage to have a little time for yourself but also stay present for your children?

Also speaking of husbands, mine has several sceptical concerns-anyone else deal with a sceptic husband and how did you turn him around?

Carving out time for yourself is important whether your kids go to school or not. It is a matter of balance that works out over time and adjusts all the time. Sports, community classes, co-ops, scouting, 4H, etc. can provide activities where you can leave your kids and you can have a breather.

Ask your husband to provide you with research that suggests homeschooling is detrimental. ;-)

[briansmama]

Originally Posted by joliebebe

I have read alot about delaying structured formal lessons until age 8-10 when the child has developed logical, consequential thinking, and that this is especially beneficial for boys. Anyone with boys who has done this, or any advice in general on homeschooling boys?

We're homeschooling our 2 boys, and this is one of our major reasons for doing so- my boys LOVE learning, but also get plenty of physical activity and play to encourage that. Then we hit the library and/or read together. No textbooks, worksheets or tests.

Also Im trying to get a picture of what life overall with homeschooling children is like... is your house always messy? are there days when you are not in the mood and want to stay in bed, what do you do at times like that? how does preparing healthy meals fit in-do the kids help? how much time is actually spent 'schooling' or is everything you do considered learning-like counting out cups of flour while cooking or recognising letters and numbers while out and about etc?

Well, I'm a neat freak, so no my house is not messy. My boys have learned that before we move on to the next fun activity, playdate, or park, they need to pick up their mess. As for staying in bed, I figure this is my job and can only call in sick (have dh stay home from work to care for our boys) if it's a real emergency. If they were in school, I'd still have to get out of bed and get them ready, drop them off after packing lunches, and pick them up a few hours later and helpw ith homework, so I'd likely not get much time in bed anyways. Yes, my boys help prepare their meals- they love it. They also help make dinner/lunch menu plans and pick out ingredients at the market. We do not spend any time doing formal seatwork, but we read, play games, creat art, and work on some type of learning project nearly every weekday. It's so much fun!

My husband also has concerns that I will burn out being around the children 24/7. How do you all manage to have a little time for yourself but also stay present for your children?
We belong to a great gym with a wonderful kids' program- gym time, outdoor play, lego tables, dress up, stories, etc. I go to yoga 3xs per week and get in cardio/sauna as well. I find the 8-10 hours to myself (including weekend workouts) is perfect for me, I do not have any desire or need to send the kids to school to have 30+ hours to myself. Just enough. We consider the price a homeschool expense that we are willing to pay for to stay healthy and sane. It costs far less than private school or even preschool.

Also speaking of husbands, mine has several sceptical concerns-anyone else deal with a sceptic husband and how did you turn him around?

Yep, mine was really nervous at first, but didn't push me to send our 1st ds to preschool when the time came, so I never did, and just ended up never sending him anywhere. Now after a few years and another child who isn't going to preschool, DH is a big advocate for homeschooling. He loves how our homeschool group celebrates their art by holding art shows and concludes the year with a family bonfire instead of a stuffy auditorium graduation. He also sees how much our kids are learning and really loves that we visit the library every week (sometimes 2 libraries). He has no concerns at all anymore.

HTH! Good luck!

[Dakota's Mom]

We started "schooling" when my son was five years old. We spent about 15 to 30 minutes per day that first year on "school work". But we did all kinds of learning activities. We baked a lot of bread that year and learned about measuring and counting (cups of flour) and how the ingredients all come together to make a yummy loaf of bread, We also did lots of field trips. He did well on all of his work except reading. I didn't push him at all. He is just now beginning to have an interest in reading. Last year, for second grade, we spent about an hour and a half to two hours per day on school work. But if we didn't feel like doing work that day or if we had something more exciting to do, we didn't do school work. This year, he is in third grade. We are adding handwriting without tears, all about spelling, and piano so I expect "school" will take 2 to 3 hours each day. We are doing Time4Learning on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. All About Spelling and Piano on Tuesday and Thursday. We will do Handwriting Without Tears and Read Alouds everyday. It's a lot more structure than we have had in the past. But I think he is ready for more structure now that he is 8. He is really interested in learning to read now. So we are going to work hard on that.

Were you at home with your children up until this point. If so, why should it be any different now. In fact, now that they are older it should be easier to be with them all the time. You will have more time for yourself now that they are better able to take care of themselves.
Kathi

[SundayCrepes]

Have you explored unschooling? It's the idea of following your child's lead. This is what we do. Plus we do a lot of strewing--providing the kids with materials and activities that we think they will like. I like the www.sonlight.com books. I buy the ones that sound good (used. check out www.allbookstores.com) If I'm not certain, I check them out from the library. My son loves all the science books but isn't big on social studies. I still get them since he may change his mine or my daughter might like them. There's a secular sonlight group on yahoo. Google them.

[Grace and Granola]

We are brand new to homeschooling too, so I don't have a ton of advice. But I did want to say something about the timing and boys. I have two boys, ages 3 and almost 5. My first son was ready to learn to read at age 3. He had the interest, aptitude and attention span. I followed his lead all the way. However, my 2nd son is a completely different story. I cannot sit with him for more than a couple minutes to "work on" anything! He is just as bright as his brother, but he has a different temperament and where his brother was super interested in reading, ds2 is very into learning about mechanical things and how things work.

All that said, boy or not, the best thing is to observe your child, offer opportunities for different experiences and see what they're interested in. Obviously at some point they will need to learn how to read and add, but I am trying not to force anything or discourage anything.

[joliebebe]

Thanks for all the great advice so far!

Were you at home with your children up until this point. If so, why should it be any different now.

Yes I have been home with them until just recently when my son did a term at kindy, just after my 3rd baby was born. I guess thats what I figure, if Ive always been home with them, and LIKE being home with them, then why shouldnt it continue like that. This is what I tell my husband when he says that I will burnout homeschooling, because Ive only ever taken care of them myself.

Have you explored unschooling? It's the idea of following your child's lead.

I really like what I have read about unschooling. I think as a style it may suit our family better than a more structured 'school at home' kind of mood. My eldest boy is very spirited and energetic. His enthusiasm is contagious and I can see us doing quite well with a style along those lines.

We already do alot of activities together like library trips and lots of reading stories together. We discuss things we have read and questions they might have. We do gardening together and talk about seeds growing and different kinds of plants etc. The boys will help me when I bake and chop vegetables for dinner etc. We paint and make play dough. Recently they have liked listening to childrens stories and songs on cd, while doing an activity like coloring. I mean we could go on like this forever, its great. But what about the learning that needs sit down time and work books...?
I also have a 5 month old, how do you care for your baby while keeping the others occupied or learning?

[SundayCrepes]

Originally Posted by joliebebe

But what about the learning that needs sit down time and work books...?
I also have a 5 month old, how do you care for your baby while keeping the others occupied or learning?

Can't think of any learning that NEEDS sit down time and especially not workbooks. These articles may answer your questions:

Math:
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...r-own-learning

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...ath-in-schools

Reading:
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...hemselves-read

Sudsbury School:
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...sudbury-valley

I recently got into the www.sonlight.com books. Their philosophy is that you can sit a child at a desk with a textbook and very little learning will happen or you can cuddle a child on mom or dad's lap on the couch and read an award winning book and lots of learning will happen. My 4.5 year old loves the book on fulcrums/levers and pullies as well as life under the sea and "what people do all day." (amongst others.) Lots of learning is going on there with nothing more formal than me reading to him. They are a religious group so I exclude their religious stuff. I also joined a secular sonlight users group. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Sonlig...guid=156716553 They've given me some great links to evolution books.

[skueppers]

My husband and I spent a lot of time talking about homeschooling, but neither of us was entirely convinced.

What convinced ME was going to a panel discussion where homeschooling parents with various philosophies talked about their experiences and answered questions.

What convinced my husband was going to a panel discussion where homeschooled teenagers talked about their experiences and answered questions.

So perhaps one of those ideas would work for your husband!

[joliebebe]

Thats a great idea Sonja, I will look around to see what we have in our area.
Dh was homeschooled himself but had a very bad experience but I guess the proof will be in the pudding if the kids are happy and learning.