My lovely boy, our fourth and last baby, Kustav, was born on Monday, April 18th. He is healthy, 4330g (9lb8oz) at birth, and everybody is smitten with him! It was a wonderful, unmedicated birth, thanks to wonderful midwives, and I am so grateful for that. Now to vent...
I am once again overwhelmed with grief because of the breastfeeding. You would think the fourth time I would be emotionally prepared, but I can't keep back the tears, and I hate that! Nobody else seems to understand the grief -- but I know that here I will find women who understand.
My breasts feel slightly heavier & firmer, but little to nothing seems to come out. Could it be there is no let-down?
I have been throwing every herb at it that I could find out about, but at this point I'm even having a hard time getting him to latch properly, so he's not getting at what little is there. I'm also struggling with the SNS this time, which I used for all 3 of my kids -- I'm not sure why, but he HATES the feeling of the tube in his mouth. As a result, feeding is taking up all of our time, and I'm full of guilt that I am neglecting the other three children. I just don't have the freedom to devote myself to feeding that I did before. He is also somewhat jaundiced, and not pooping (formula is constipating him), so I am under pressure to get more down him, and more frequently. I did get him out into the sun a few times yesterday, and it seems a bit better today. However, the jaundice also makes him sleepy, which doesn't help!
I have only found the time and energy to pump twice, and pumped almost nothing. Once it was 2ml, once it was 5ml (total both sides). I just broke down when I saw that.
I know that post-partum hormones are also playing a part in this, but I'm starting to resent being told, "It's just your hormones..." by well-meaning loved ones!
My husband is off work for only one more week, so I'm trying not even to think about how I'll manage then!
So, apart from needing a sympathetic ear, I wanted to ask advice from you experienced and smart mamas -
1) did you find pumping helped? Should I dedicate myself to a rigorous pumping schedule to see if that increases my supply?
2) How long does goat's rue usually take to kick in? I'm taking all kinds of herbs together -- so I'm not sure which, if any, might help. Is there any advice about which ones to try, or how to alternate or combine them, etc??
3) I realize it's only 6 days right now, but how long did it take some of you to see an increase in supply? Mine is so minimal I don't even know how to measure - I try to get as much of it directly into the baby as I can, so obviously I can't measure that, but I don't near more than a few swallows on each side, and I never feel a let-down (but I never really did).
4) did you develop a regimen/routine with feeding/pumping/herbs? What worked well for you? I feel completely disorganized, which isn't helping the feelings of being overwhelmed....
thanks for listening, and any advice is welcome!