how did your kids with ASD behave as 6-12-month-olds? Esp your mildly-ASD girls.
Vivi's almost-13-year-old half-sister (via me, a super successful, wonderful open adoption situation) is profoundly gifted and also has ASD, as well as some other learning difficulties like agraphia. M was an incredibly placid baby- she literally never cried unless something was wrong, was alert and engaged, and was a bright, sweet little girl, though was openly "shy."
We describe V as being an "easy" baby, but, honestly, we don't know a lot of babies. She's easy to us, anyhow. Since birth, she's been a funny mix of super-calm and hyper-intense. These days, there's a lot less calm and a LOT more intense.
Lately I've been a little concerned about her. After doing some reading, I'm a bit more concerned. She makes eye contact and really enjoys patty-cake and itsy-bitsy spider, but isn't cuddly at all. We cosleep and breastfeed, and while she resists being held closely, she does like to sleep/eat with a hand gently resting on either DH or me, or both. She finds a lot of things funny, and smiles freely at DH and me, almost never at others, and laughs seldom. She responds to questions- "Where are the puppies?" and she looks until she sees them. "What does a monkey say?" and she pauses, smiles, flaps her arms and says "ha-ha-ha-ha". (That is super cute.)
Her eye contact level has definitely decreased since 6 months (which spurred my recent flurry of research). She appears to have Moebius mouth- image 1- 5 months, image 2- 7 months, image 3- 2ish weeks. After reading this, I realized that she didn't (and still doesn't) roll over as the research says an NT child should- here's video from one of her first roll-overs. She started babbling a little late, not really til 7 months, and now still mostly relies on consonants, though we think she says a few weird words appropriately, like "anana" for banana at mealtimes, and "sgeegee" for spaghetti. Maybe not, though. She doesn't say "mamama" unless she's wailing, and says "dadada" maybe once a day.
She crawls fine as far as I can see, and has been pulling to stand since the day she learned how to cross-crawl at 6.25 months. She seems pretty coordinated, but will stand leaning on things for very long amounts of time- if I'd let her, she would have stood and watched They Might Be Giants "Here Comes Science" for 30+ minutes without sitting or falling from the time she could stand.
We did the tilt test tonight a few times, and she failed each time.
Her father and I would likely be coded with mild ASD if we were kids now; as it stands we both function reasonably well in general society, but still struggle with social stuff (me moreso than him, frankly). M's birthfather is very similar as well.
So, knowing that there may well be a genetic component of some sort, and seeing what are some questionable (though probably zebra-in-a-herd-of-horses stuff) developmental things, do you see any similarities between V and your kiddos' baby time? Is it worth bringing up at her 9 month well-baby?
I guess my only major concern is that because she's so alert and engaging (and female) that if she is on the spectrum, it won't get caught until her childhood years. We plan on homeschooling regardless, so I guess I also think early intervention, if needed, really needs to be initiated by us.
Thank you so much for your insights.