Feelin Like a Spiritual Blob

[Tashakittie]

Hey Spiritual Ones,

As the title says, thats how I'm feeling. I feel really stuck, and just need to vent. I'm generally a very grateful, happy, positive person, but right now, I don't know why, I just feel like a rock in a pool of mud. DH and I are struggling- like so many others. I try to be grateful and look at all the amazingness we are blessed with, but right now, I feel like the Universe is sending me no answers, not returning my calls, completely ignoring me!!! Our kids are the most amazing things to ever happen to us- all we want is to provide them with everything they need for a safe, secure, lovely life. I just want some- I don't even know- closure? support? a way out? a free ticket to security? Karmically, I also feel like we deserve so much more. Maybe that's where I'm wrong- in feeling like we deserve anything. Maybe that thought process interferes with my abundance?

[Sierra]

Does it help to know that you are, in a sense, a spiritual blob made up of atoms from the universe, including 13 billion year old hydrogen...made up of stardust and remnants of a time long before us?

I suspect it probably doesn't, cuz if you are like me...well, when I am in a funk, nothing anybody says ever really helps, and I just have to wait it out.

I don't know about the abundance thing. I don't subscribe to abundance theology, but if you think your thought process in interfering with your abundance, I guess the logical thing to do would be change your thought process. Have you tried rearranging the furniture?

Oops...its late and I guess my head is not on straight. I came back to edit because I re-read your post and saw you just wanted to vent. Vent away! I know the feeling well. And it is really, really tough to be strapped!

[kierae]

I completely understand this feeling. I stepped away from local groups because of the clickiness. I felt free for many years but the past couple years have left me searching for community.

[Tashakittie]

The hardest part of needing community is having children. I am, by nature, a loner and a homebody. My ds's are not, by any means. I felt fine, w/o community before children, but now, it really feels essential. Most family has come to terms with our Pagan hippie ways, and do not try to force mainstream crap down our throats anymore. I've been spending as much time with local family as possible- my parents, my parents-in-law, and it really helps. I try to ignore the negatives, and really appreciate the positives. The few friends who "get" us are wonderful. It is so important that our children are surrounded with genuine, awesome people.
The furniture has been rearranged somewhat; we have a very small, rectangular townhouse, so there isn't a whole lot that can be done. I've begun feng shuing the house, and trying to bring positive intentions to every space.