Biting at Daycare and Home

[intunement]

I have recently started a small home daycare and have one 2 year old of my own. I enrolled twins (boy and a girl) and have found the little girl to hit and bite daily. She mostly targets her brother, although she has hit other children as well. Her parents seem to really care and want the best for both kids, but tell me they don't know what to do with her. I don't know what to do either. My son went through a hitting stage, and we just taught him gentle touch through repetition and example. It took a few months to work. I'm concerned both from a mother's perspective (that my son will pick up hitting again and biting as well or be mistreated) but also from a provider's perspective that there is a certain liability that I have for the other children enrolled. I would love to know what other parents would do to help deter biting and what parents would expect of a daycare owner in regard to having a biter. While I love her and her brother, they are relatively high maintenance compared to the other kids - fighting, crying, acting out, and I'm not sure if I should be considering telling the parents that I cannot accommodate their children. I would hate to do that, but I'm really not sure if I can ensure the quality of care for the other kids.

[kibba]

When I worked in a daycare we focused more on the victim. Did a firm "No biting" "biting hurts" and pointed out the hurt child "look X is crying, biting hurts" and then that was it and focused on the victim. We also tried to keep the biter close so that we could try and stop it before it started. Like if we had story time, the biter was sat right next to one of the teachers. Maybe you could have a specific toy that he can bite. "If you need to bite, you can bite X(a teether?)"

I know moms get so angry when their child gets bit...but it's very common in a daycare type setting to have a child that bites.

good luck..!

[intunement]

Biting

Those are some good suggestions. Thanks. I like the idea of giving her something else to bite, although I'm not sure if she will go for it. Proximity is also a good tool, though hasn't always worked. There are times when I can't possibly be with them (such as going to the bathroom or stepping into the kitchen to get their food, or when we are doing an activity and the other kids need a turn, etc.) On Friday, I had my mother helping. We were reading a book and the little girl and her brother sat down on my lap. They were happy and wiggling a little as two year olds do. Then he made a very slight fussing sound and got up from my lap and I saw that there was a bite mark on his arm! It hadn't broken the skin. I hadn't noticed her bite him or show any warning signs that she would. Grandma had been sitting across from us, watching us, and she had not seen it happen either. Thinking back, the little girl might have leaned toward him for a split second, but it was hardly noticeable.